As we begin this exciting journey together in The New Year, I know God is able to change our hearts and set us free in areas where we have been bound.
Because of our depravity, we are bound in many areas. Last week, as a “preview,” I asked women to begin to pray about “one stone” instead of a whole quarry. Some of you have identified one, others are anxious, because you are not sure. Some of you have honestly said, “Will this really help?” Even though I pray and read my Bible, two hours later, I’m bound again.
It won’t be a quick fix, but we rest on the promise of God that He who began a good work in us will bring it to completion. If we cooperate with His Spirit instead of resisting Him, we will, indeed, experience more freedom, more joy, and more intimacy with Him. He is the one who remove stones, and gives us a new heart, so we must work with Him.
By the end of this week I am asking you to have identified one stone, at the very most two, that you would like to see taken from your heart. The other goal is to find an accountability partner.
The first baby step is seeing the stone God wants to remove. We are in a battle, and one of the enemy’s main devices is to keep us from seeing. If you do not see your sin, the enemy has already won. Many of us may see the surface sin, but I want you to look deeper, pondering the deep “idol” that is behind the sin, the stone in your heart. In Tim Keller’s book Counterfeit Gods, he identifies them as control, power, approval, and comfort.
For example, if you struggle with gluttony, your deep idol may be comfort; with rage, your deep idol may be control; with procrastination, it may be comfort; with contentment, it may be comfort or approval. In each case you think there is something other than God that can meet your deepest needs. This is not just a journey in having a stone removed, but a journey toward intimacy with God, so that you can discover that He, and He alone, can thrill your soul and satisfy your deepest longings.
I’ll share the rock I want removed. I often fail to give grace. I am judgmental. I find myself thinking and sometimes saying a “sideways” comment instead of simply speaking the truth in love. This is manipulation. This is not loving well, not loving as Jesus loved, and grieving the Spirit of God. It affects not only my relationship with these family members, but actually pushes away the God with whom I so long to be intimate. What is my root idol? CONTROL. I must give up “control” and turn them over to God. I long not only to refrain from hurtful comments, but to truly have a heart of grace toward them, seeing what is lovely in them instead of always the thing that is wrong. I am listing five reasons why I want that big rock of CONTROL taken from my heart. I am reading them over daily.
Idols seem to be good Gods, but they destroy you. It is never enough to let go of an idol, we must run to the one true God. We can do that with singing, with spending time in the Word, and using the Word as a springboard for prayer, and by allowing the Word to truly direct our days.
Take a question a day, or more if you like.
Let’s begin with a story, of a rock in the heart of Martha, and how the Messiah took it out. It can happen for each of us too. Her surface sin was anger, but her root sin was probably approval or control. But Martha the Manipulator met the Messiah — and as we go through her story in the next week, you will see a heart of flesh appear.
MARTHA THE MANIPULATOR (The root sins of control and approval)
(Sermon Resource: Jim Om on Redeemer.Com Sermon title: Models of Manipulation – worth every penny of the 2.50 MP3)
It’s a familiar story, but Jim Om gave me new insights. Go slowly, meditate, and allow His Spirit to speak to you.
Read Luke 10:38-40
1. Describe the setting in Luke 10:38-40, contrasting the two sisters. Find adjectives that describe each of them. Read carefully. Does the Vemeer painting to the left ring true — or how do you imagine the scene?
Vemeer pictures Jesus being alone, which I think was the situation because of the pronouns “he and him” in verse 38. If that was true, Martha’s anxiety seems particularly out of order. Chuck Swindoll said, “Martha, Martha, chips and dip would be fine.” But even if all the disciples were there, she is still out of line. Let’s look for the deep idol in her heart, and perhaps we will also see our own.
2. Jim Om says there are two signs of manipulation — and at least one is always present in manipulation. Here, in Martha’s words to Jesus, see if you can find:
A. Trying to use guilt:
B. Giving an order:
3. When we get anxious about something, it is often a red flag that our idol is operating. We are afraid we are not going to get what our idol promises. In Martha’s case, she really may have been thinking about her reputation as a hostess. This was an important guest and she wanted people to notice — so it could have been approval. Because manipulation is involved, it may also have been control. She thought she knew better than Jesus what was needed. What do you think was her deep idol? Do you identify in any way with longing for approval or control? If so, share.
4. When you you tend to get anxious? This will help you identify your idol.
Read Luke 10:41-42
5. When a name is spoken twice in Scripture, there is always passionate emotion. David said, “Absalom, Absalom — oh my son, would that I could have died instead of you. Jesus said, ” “Jerusalem, oh Jerusalem –would that I could have gathered you under my wings like a mother hen, but you would not listen.” And at the cross, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken me?” When Jesus says, “Martha, Martha,” he is intensely concerned about her just as he is intensely concerned about us when we run after our idols. To me, He would say,
“Dee, Dee — you are trying to control the situation — let go, and let me take care of this person.” What would he say to “Susan, Susan…Tracy, Tracy…Anne, Anne…Renee…Renee, etc.
Be still and listen.
Have you identified a deep idol that is behind your surface sin? If so, what would Jesus say to you?
6. What is the better thing Mary has chosen? (This is not a negative comment about serving, nor is it a separation of the sacred and the secular. It has to do with the heart and with the object of worship.)
7. It is never enough to allow a stone to be taken out, we must run to the real God, as Mary is doing, developing her love relationship with Jesus, “hanging” as The Message puts it, “on His every word.” How might you “practice His presence,” even as you are getting ready in the morning, driving to work, caring for children…
Next week we will start chipping at the stone you have identified. Have you found an accountability partner yet? Rebecca, Jess, and others have — let us pray and find someone!
180 comments
Hi Everyone, this is Rebecca’s friend Donna. I wanted to let you all know I am joining the study and am excited to see what God has in store for me as he removes my stony heart. The stone I am working on is disappointment and discouragement. I probably won’t be posting often as my job requires a great deal of International travel and I don’t always have the opportunity to go online, but I have committed to doing the study (I paste it into a Word doc and then answer all the questions) and sharing my thoughts with Rebecca to provide encouragement to each other. I will be praying for all of you during this study. Thank you Dee for providing this opportunity.
Welcome, welcome, Donna. So glad to have you with Rebecca. Jump in when you can — good to know you are supporting Rebecca. Two are better than one, because if one falls, the other can help him up! Thank you for joining us.
Welcome Donna!! Glad to have you praying and participating with us!
Thanks Dee and JES. Glad to be focused on this study, I’m sure it will be a blessing.
I just finished reading through the study questions..I am so looking forward to this study. 🙂
Me too Rebecca! This is soo exciting and challenging!
I, too, am so glad to be taking part in this study. Looking forward to the journey…
Hi Paige!! Welcome! 🙂
Hello Paige and welcome!
I will attempt to answer these questions the best I know how. However, let me first by beginning with the fact that I know that this study is God ordained and confirmed. Today, at Church the Holy Spirit came in such an amazing way that even after the benediction, the people stayed crying out to God and it was confirmed through one of His vessels, First Lady Louis, that God was breaking up the fallow ground of the members’ hearts. His presence was so overwhelming…it was amazing. And I hadn’t yet talked to Mrs. Louis about being accountable to me in this area!Also,Wednesday night before New Year’s, the Pastor begin to speak as the Spirit led him and he said that God wanted to give us new hearts!! What an amazing first Sunday…taking it one day at a time
Ok, on to the questions:
1.I believe the painting is a great picture of what took place that day because as the Scripture says it appears that Martha looks a little impatient as she’s standing near Jesus with her party platter, while Mary is calmly waiting for Him to teach more.
2. Guilt a. “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work?” (NLT)
Order b.”Tell her to come and help me.”(NLT)
3.I think her deep idol was approval because hospitality was a big deal in that culture and although Jesus entered the house alone, his disciples were still near to witness things. I can identify with the longing for approval in so many ways. If my children don’t look or perform perfectly, I worry about what people will say about me. When I had to move in with my Mom temporarily to take care of some debts, I worried about it getting out that I couldn’t take care of myself or my children and avoided people at all costs who might know. I fear not being approved by men because I know that I’m not the most gorgeous woman in the world (I am kinda cute,however. :-), so I have given myself to men who were not worthy, just to have them use me and leave me still. The list goes on and on, so yes, I can certainly identify!
4. When I tend to get anxious, I become tense and irritable and I believe this may indicate an idol of control and approval.
5. Jesus to me, “JES, JES, you are seeking approval and acceptance again. I have already approved and accepted you through my death and resurrection. I am more than enough. I will provide for you and fulfill your deepest longing for love if you just surrender. Trust me. You have my track record through my Word and your life experiences that I am completely trustworthy.”
6. Mary has chosen a teachable heart and a submissive will. She makes herself available to Christ first.
7. I could begin practicing His presence by speaking with Him in the morning before the day begins; singing to Him or listening to uplifting music on the way to work and school; I could read His Word with my girls and talk to them about him.
JES — what a wonderful honest thoughtful beginning. So glad you are with us. Sounds like the Lord is confirming this journey mightily in your life. That’s encouraging to hear.
Thank you Ms. Dee for allowing the Lord to use you to even begin this study! What a godsend you are! 🙂
Jes, you are so right!! This is so encouraging to hear, and a confirmation as to how I have seen God moving in Dee’s studies. Dee’s online studies have made a HUGE impact on my life. My husband even notices it.
God is also working in the new church we are attending..Especially in our sunday school class. He taught in 2 Kings 5:1-5 yesterday and it fit in with this study in regard to the importance of finding an accountability partner..God likes to speak to us in prayer, his word AND through other believers!! If we don’t reveal our pain or our stones to a friend how will they know how to pray for us? 🙂
Wow! Glad to hear how God has sent His confirming Word to you as well! How delightful! And you’re so right about revealing our stones to those we can trust who will provide us with wise, Bible instructed counsel and prayer, who can we turn to? James says that we are healed when we confess our faults to one another and pray fervently for one another. So ladies, remember me as I remember you! I believe this is going to be our year!
How amazing that this study is available to me now. I had relatives visiting for 2 weeks, and I noticed that I often found them irritating. When they don’t listen closely, and don’t “get it”, when they go on and on about a subject in too much detail…I’d noticed this with some of my friends and my husband, but now I noticed it with my beloved sister, too! That’s when I began to ask God: “Why am I like this? I don’t want to be cranky and irritable, judgemental, over nothing!” Now, I see it is my idol of control. I began praying for God to reveal my heart to me, today in church, during communion. And, here is an online discussion to help me discover what God wants to take out of my heart, that He may fill me with His love.
When I asked Jesus what He would say to me, He said:”Sandy, Sandy, you have time to listen to them, time to hear them; they won’t take anything away from you, because I’ve given you all you need. You won’t be overwhelmed by them.” How I love our Counselor and Father!
I don’t have an accountability partner yet. Not sure how to go about that…thank you for this study, to open and cleanse my heart for Him!
Welcome Sandy! I so identify with your thoughts and it thrills my soul to see God coming alongside and leading You here, confirming it through His Spirit.
Welcome Sandy!!! :0)
1. Mary: welcoming, patient, listening. Martha: distracted, impatient.
I feel that the painting describes the situation well. It’s how I’ve always imagined it.
2.A: Martha used guilt by asking if Jesus cares that Mary left her to make preparations alone.
2B: Martha gives an order by telling Jesus to tell Mary to help her.
3. I think both control and approval were behind Martha’s behavior. I understand the struggle with both because it has been important to me that people like me (approval) and have despaired when unable to control the situation of how I was perceived by them.
4. I become anxious when things feel chaotic (control) or when I fear displeasing people or especially God (approval) and when out of my comfort zone.
5. Comfort is behind my squandering time (which leads to not taking time with God.) I think He would say “Tracy, Tracy, just realize that I am your true comfort and sit with Me quietly for a while.”
6. Mary chose to put her heart at rest at the feet of Jesus.
7. I can take time with Him deliberately and invite Him in by prayer to all I do.
Tracy — you are a bright light in this group.
1. * Jesus walks through the town, Martha extends a hospitable spirit toward Him and invites Him over, As Martha prepares a feast for Him, Mary sits at His feet captivated with Him rather than helping Martha. Martha’s plans for a feast are hindered and she grows angry with Mary and Jesus.
Mary was distracted from cooking by Jesus and Martha was distracted from Jesus by her hospitality.
*Mary: Captivated, consumed by Jesus
*Martha: Angry, consumed by service
*Yes the painting does ring true..Mary sitting at Jesus feet looking at him in a relaxed sitting position where she has been there for a while and plans on staying there for a while and Mary over his shoulder standing up with bread in her hand confronting Him.
2. A. Trying to use guilt: “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone?”
B. Giving an order: “Then tell her to help me.”
3. YES, I do think approval and control are quite possibly the idols God is dredging to the surface this week..
4. Hmmm..Let me think..Wow..the only time I get super anxious is about three days before I sing at church…Long story so I won’t go into detail but this is another example of my idol being approval and control. And to think I thought I was closer to being more like ‘Mary’, not Martha.. ;P
I think we all have all of the idols, but some are more prominent in our hearts.
You are a blessing in this group, Rebecca — in many ways.
1. Describe the setting in Luke 10:38-40, contrasting the two sisters.
I noticed that Jesus entered the village where the sisters lived; He did not go to their house of His own accord but rather Martha invited Him.
Martha – welcoming, hospitable, eager to serve; I’m thinking she was
organized and prepared to be able to welcome unexpected
guests.
But verse 40 says “But Martha was distracted with all her
preparations (or much service)”. Distracted, she became
resentful of Mary not helping; it boiled over into anger.
I find it interesting that she directed her angry words to
Jesus and not Mary.
Mary – shows her heart of love toward Jesus by sitting at His feet,
listening to every word.
I like how Mary is pictured in the painting; totally relaxed, her head resting on her hand, totally focused on the Lord. She is a good listener, really listening to Him. Martha’s eyebrows are raised, her forehead wrinkled; probably a look of exasperation and impatience.
I note in the painting that even as Martha is confronting Jesus, and His head is turned toward Martha’s, Mary never takes her eyes off Jesus.
Paige has joined us. She put this comment on the last post just before I put this new post — I want you, my dear sisters, to see it so you can pray for her and welcome her. This is what she wrote:
Paige says:
January 2, 2011 at 8:04 pm (Edit)
1. How did you see God move in your heart and life this Christmas?
2. Meditate on Ezekiel 36:26
A. What promise does God give here?
God promises to give me a new heart and to put a new spirit within me. He will take my heart of stone and in its place give me a heart of flesh.
B. Who accomplishes this?
God alone can accomplish this.
C. Share one way God has changed you, chipping away the stone from your heart, in the last few years.
Last year, a week before Christmas, my husband left me. He moved out and filed for divorce on the same day without even giving separation a thought. I prayed and fasted asking the Lord to please intervene. I begged my husband to reconsider. There was no explanation except that he wanted a new life that did not include me or our two “teenage” children. I know that I could have easily let my heart turn to stone and refuse to feel anything because the pain was (and is) so great. But God has given me an even greater love for my husband than I had when we were still married. I am filled with compassion for him and I am believing that God will intervene and that my husband will come to salvation and return to us.
2. What are some possible stones that come to mind?
Possible stones would be showing more love to my children by not “demanding my own way” – I see that I can be very manipulative at times. Another stone would be to eat healthier and take better care of myself.
What stone is He leading you to tackle first? I feel like He is leading me to do both – show greater love to my children and take better care of myself.
I have a plan in place (with a group from our local house of prayer to start a detox diet tomorrow – we will meet weekly to hold each other accountable, etc.)
Spending more time in the Word and in God’s presence will be the starting place for loving more and being less selfish and controlling.
3. Who might you invite to join you in this journey? You are more apt to have success with an accountability partner. Again, ask Him, tell us before you ask her, and let us pray.
I will pray about who I might have join me on this journey.
Elizabeth has joined us as well — and what a lovely woman. Here is what she posted on the last post just before I put this post — so you can know and welcome her.
Elizabeth says:
January 2, 2011 at 8:39 pm (Edit)
Well, I am not sure if it’s too late to join in–I’m a newbie! These exercises have been challenging and convicting!
1. God moved in my heart and life this Christmas by breaking my heart for the needy and orphaned children in the world. I asked my husband and kids to not give me any presents, even stocking stuffers, and my husband joined me–on Christmas day we sat down with the kids and chose “gifts” from Samaritan’s purse to give to the needy (goats, etc…)
It felt like a gift He gave me to move in my heart this way because without the distractions, for the first time in my 33 years as a Christian, I felt more able to receive HIM this Christmas.
2. Meditate on Ezekiel 36:26
A. He promises to give me a NEW heart, of flesh, by first removing my heart of stone.
B. God alone.
C. I am increasingly aware of the way I place myself on the throne of my heart, guarding my idols of control and approval, and comfort. I hear the fear in me disguised as criticism at my family…fear of losing control.
The stone that keeps coming back to mind, I feel even ashamed of. It is the way I relate to my elementary aged daughter. We have always struggled, or rather I have. I do believe she is happy with our relationship and feels loved by me, but I struggle in my heart with feelings of irritation, frustration, and I know I do not show a patience and unconditional love that I long to give.
2. Jim Om says there are two signs of manipulation – and at least one
is always present in manipulation. Here, in Martha’s words to
Jesus, see if you can find:
A. Trying to use guilt: “Lord, do You not care that my sister has
left me to do all the serving alone?”
I see something behind this – I don’t want to read into the text what isn’t there, but it’s almost like I sense Martha is perhaps not only frustrated that she’s doing all the work, but also that Jesus is not paying any attention to her. Her needs are not being met.
I’ve been there and done that. If I’m in the kitchen, busy cooking and rushing about, and my husband and kids are sitting in the family room watching TV, I can get louder and louder, slam a few cupboard doors to get their attention. Like, I could use some help in here! But deeper than that is why aren’t they paying attention to me, don’t they see that I need help? They’re not considering me, they are oblivious to me! They’re not caring for me!
Maybe that’s why Martha didn’t confront Mary directly, like “Mary, could I speak to you in the kitchen for a moment? I need you to help me, I can’t get this done all by myself!”
But instead, Martha confronts Jesus, “Lord, don’t you care…” I get the feeling that behind her words is “don’t You care about me?”
B. Giving an order: “Then tell her to help me.”
Insightful.
Often we do think Jesus doesn’t care when He doesn’t do things the way we think He should. Yet, and Susan or others can answer this — why do we know He cares? (Martha didn’t have this knowledge yet.)
Because He went all the way to the Cross for me, and for Martha, for all of us; unconditional love despite our sin!
Welcome Paige and Elizabeth! It’s neat to see how God’s Spirit is working personal revival in women’s hearts all over the place!
AMEN SUSAN!!!!!! 🙂
Thank you, Susan.
3. This statement makes me ponder: “She (Martha) thought she knew better than Jesus what was needed.” I’m thinking her idols may well have been control and approval.
“And she had a sister called Mary, who moreover was listening to the Lord’s word, seated at His feet.” (v. 39)
I think that verse sums up what Jesus’ visit to their home was all about; it was about Him, the focus should have been on Him, and Mary realized that.
But Martha had her own plan, and was trying to orchestrate the events as she saw fit. Her idols had pushed God off the throne of her heart; in a way, she was serving herself more than the Lord.
Yes, I identify with having a deep longing for approval. Tracy hit the nail on the head with her saying that “it is important to me that people like me (approval) and have despaired when unable to control the situation of how I was perceived by them.”
When I sense the disapproval of others, it can sting and hurt so sharply as if someone slapped me in the face. How many times have I tried to do “damage control”, to repair my image by explaining myself, trying to put myself in a better light, even lying about my motives.
When I’m in “control-mode”, I find it hard to accept help. If it’s with housework, I find myself getting anxious that the person trying to help me isn’t doing it the way I want it done.
I think at the very root of approval, or control, and all idols of the heart, is PRIDE.
5. I need to pray more about this, but for me, it is my thought life that is behind my surface sins. As I was praying last week, about which stone, this verse came to mind, Proverbs 23:7, “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.”
What is in my mind, my thoughts, will work itself out in the person I am. I thought of how Jesus said that what a man puts in his body doesn’t make him unclean, but the uncleanness comes from the inside.
My outward behavior can be good, but all manner of ungodly thoughts can be going on inside.
I want to be on the inside what I appear to be on the outside. I think my stone is my thought-life.
Read Luke 10:38-40
1. Describe the setting in Luke 10:38-40, contrasting the two sisters. Find adjectives that describe each of them. Read carefully.
Jesus enters Mary and Martha’s home. Martha welcomed Him in. Mary sat at Jesus feet and heard what He had to say. Martha, distracted with much serving, complains to Jesus that Mary is not helping her and that He should make her help.
Martha: distracted with much serving
Mary: attentive to Jesus
Does the Vemeer painting to the left ring true — or how do you imagine the scene? I had always pictured a room full of people (the disciples), but in the reading it only says Martha welcomed Jesus into her home, so this painting is probably a good depiction.
2. Jim Om says there are two signs of manipulation — and at least one is always present in manipulation. Here, in Martha’s words to Jesus, see if you can find:
A. Trying to use guilt: Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?
B. Giving an order: therefore, tell her to help me.
3. When we get anxious about something, it is often a red flag that our idol is operating. We are afraid we are not going to get what our idol promises. In Martha’s case, she really may have been thinking about her reputation as a hostess. This was an important guest and she wanted people to notice — so it could have been approval. Because manipulation is involved, it may also have been control. She thought she knew better than Jesus what was needed. What do you think was her deep idol? I think her deep idol was both control and approval.
Do you identify in any way with longing for approval or control? If so, share.
A resounding YES would be my answer. One of my stones was actually “not demanding my own way” – which is manipulation and control – and I find that when I do demand my own way it is to get attention. Yikes, I always knew I identified more with Martha than with Mary, but never realized it was a manipulation and control issue. Just kind of felt sorry for myself because I was the one doing all the work while others could just “sit at Jesus feet”!
4. When do you tend to get anxious? This will help you identify your idol.
A lot of my current anxiety stems from being a single parent of two teenagers. I know they need their daddy and I worry over whether I am being a good example of Christ to them. It is impossible to be mother and father to them and my heart just breaks knowing how much they love, miss, and need their daddy. I feel anxious when I think about being alone after my children are both gone next year to college. I feel anxious over life itself and how depressed I am some days. I want to feel joy again – I am tired of crying. I want to BELIEVE and TRUST in God’s goodness.
Oh Paige — I’m so glad you are with us. You are a beautiful woman of God and your children are blessed to have you. Of course you are grieving, and you must. But may we also help you speak the truth to your soul, that Jesus loves, cares, and will be a husband to the “widow” and a father to the fatherless. I’m so glad you are here.
Thank you for the gentle reminder, Dee. I know the words well, I pray to experience Jesus as my greatest companion. I will say to my soul (my mind, will and emotions): Jesus truly loves me and is with me always. May I hear and obey His voice and speak the truth over and over to myself.
Thank you, Dee, for taking the time to minister to us.
3. i am a martha on so many levels, and from your comments Dee i am also a Dee:) my heart longs to let go of the need for controle that so often robs me of all joy, and to my great sadness, I rob the joy of those around me with my critical spirit!
5. my idol is control, not a good idol with 5 children, 3 teenagers! they are my reminder that I MUST smash this idol in a million pieces this year!!! I LONG for JOY this year!
6/7. 7 answers 6, she hung on his every word! how I long to hear him in the stillness (i need to turn off the TV and computer) and in the chaos (which is in heavy supply:) I wnat to remember that God is IN the chaos and can calm the storm inside even if not the one going on around me.
Satan is laughing, as i try to do this study the sweet blessings that I have sat down for lunch have asked so much of me that this STONE feels like a mountain…..
I can tell we are going to love having you on this blog, Cyndi!
I have five children too — and that’s a lot to control! 🙂
yes, we both have two from Asia, and one is an older adoption in the last 5 months. met you you Toledo and fell in love with you and your beautiful daughter and grandbaby:)
Oh you are that Cyndi! I loved meeting you. We have so much in common, I had to laugh when you told me of some of the struggles with your adoptive kids, because I SO REMEMBER. But you are handling it with grace and humor and faith, and that’s wonderful. SO VERY GLAD TO HAVE YOU HERE.
thanks Dee, so glad to have you as my mentor:)
One of the things I desire to do this year is to start praying through the Psalms..Dee first introduced it to me through this blog as well as some of the ladies here and I loved it..Here is my first offering to Jesus in relation to this study..I thought i would share it:
Psalm 18: 16-19
16..He sent from on high, He took me;
He drew me out of many waters.
LORD YOU ARE MAJESTIC, YET PERSONAL..LORD YOU HAVE HEARD MY CRY AND ARE PULLING ME OUT OF THESE STONY WATERS THAT ARE BINDING MY HEART, THE IDOLS THAT ARE SLOWLY DROWNING ME..YOU ARE MY HUSBAND, MY PROTECTOR WHO HAS COME TO RESCUE ME..
17 He delivered me from my strong enemy,
And from those who hated me, for they were too mighty for me.
LORD , YOU WILL DELIVER ME FROM THE BONDS OF THESE STONES THAT HATE ME..IN YOUR WAY, IN YOUR TIME.. I AM WEAK BUT YOU ARE STRONG..YOU ARE MY STRONG HUSBAND.. COME TO MY RESCUE JESUS..I PRAISE YOU LORD, MY DELIVERER!
18 They confronted me in the day of my calamity,
But the LORD was my stay.
JESUS YOU ARE MY STRENGTH..MY STRONGHOLD..MY SHIELD WHEN MY HEART IS WEAK AND THE BATTLE IS STRONG..
19 He brought me forth also into a broad place;
He rescued me, because He delighted in me.
LORD YOU ARE PULLING ME FROM THESE WATERS AND ARE PLACING MY FEET IN A BROAD PLACE..YOU WANT TO SAVE ME FROM MY IDOLS.. AND I KNOW YOU WILL MAKE MY FOOTSTEPS FIRM..LORD YOU ARE MY RESCUER!! LORD I CAN’T FATHOM THE DEPTH OF YOUR LOVE ..TO THINK YOU ACTUALLY DELIGHT IN ME EVEN THOUGH I HAVE THESE UGLY STONES?!?!..I AM SO UNWORTHY, YET YOU LOVE ME AND PURSUE ME AND DESIRE TO RESCUE ME..HOW CAN I RESIST SUCH A HUSBAND? HELP ME TO RUN TO YOU AND REST IN YOUR ARMS..hELP ME TO DELIGHT IN YOU..IN YOUR WORD, IN SONG, IN YOUR PRESENCE…
So good, Rebecca!
My dear friend Jean is going to be my accountability partner!
Dee, That is great!!!
How wonderful to come back after the New Year holiday and find many new women have joined us. Welcome to each of you Donna, Jes, Paige, Sandy, Elizabeth and Cindi. I enjoyed every post. Paige, I am praying for you. I plan to work on my word document and hope to post later in the week. Lord please guide our steps as we look to You for healing and lead us to friends that we can partner with.
Thank you for your prayers, Anne.
Oh my dear Lord, please help me to actually WANT my stone removed. In some ways I have become so comfortable with it, I am afraid to let go. When I am most anxious, it is always because something has come between me and my time. My idol is my schedule, my root sin–control, mixed with a lot of comfort–which is why I get uncomfortable just thinking about the stone being removed!
Lord, help my unbelief that somehow I actually have any control, and that my way is ever better than Your perfect plan for me.
Forgive me, forgive me for clinging so hard to my stones.
thank you for being so honest! I can so relate to your fear of letting go of control! I will pray for us to let go. im not sure what is worse, not wanting to get rid of the stones or wanting to get rid of them so bad and just not knowing how. can’t wait to go on this journey with you Elizabeth.
Love your honesty Elizabeth!
Cyndi, thank you. I read your initial post and was so encouraged. My heart does long to be free, I just so often find myself fighting for my “rights” to have an organized schedule, and to have my family adhere to it! I want to give my family, and my Lord, the gift of my release…and let go of my “princess plan” 😉
My day goes just fine until something interferes with what I hoped to accomplish, or my husband is late…but I also see my controlling towards my older child, wanting her to behave a certain way and not giving her the freedom, or the grace, to just be a child.
I don’t have an accountability partner, but here I would like to confess that I want to let Him carve out my stone of control.
Thank you all, what a beautiful fellowship I feel here!
Blessings!
Oh you speak heart! how I long to be FREE of this slave of control but the fear when the house is a mess or a child makes a bad choice is so hard!
God help us to trust you enough with our fear that we can give you our control!!! I want that stone thrown into the pit of hell where it belongs and a huge bolder of JOY to take its place! I want to laugh and play with my kids instead of harp on them to clean their rooms, do their chores, wear less mak-up and pull up thier pants etc.
more grace Lord, more grace!
with your help Jesus……only with the power of Holy Spirit will this happen. take over Spirit, break me where you need, but please, take over!
1. I would picture this scene a bit differently, maybe a video version, with Mary quietly sitting as shown and Martha scurrying back and forth to the kitchen, or even staying in the kitchen and working for long periods, only to come out and serve, maybe sweating from the work and hot kitchen, with a look of discontent on her face.
Mary: Peaceful, joyful, content, absorbed
Martha: Frantic, worried (that everything is perfect), frustrated, possibly angry, distracted, demanding.
2. A. Trying to use guilt: (amplified) Lord, is it nothing to You that my sister has left me to serve alone?
B. Giving an order: (NIV). Tell her to help me!
3. I think Martha’s deep idols was approval and control. Everything had to be perfect (to her standards) and she was unaware of what was really important – sitting at the feet of Jesus. She had an agenda and wanted Mary to do what she (Martha) thought was right. I think she may have also felt left out though, she had chosen her path (of serving and making sure everything was perfect) and then realized that Mary was enjoying the moment more. Perhaps she longed to be like Mary and didn’t know how.
I often long for approval and in the process try to control. My husband and I host a small group at our home with 3 other couples and I always cook dinner for the group. It is usually on a Saturday night after a long work week or a long trip. I get up in the morning, ready to tackle the cleaning, the laundry, the grocery shopping the cooking and then strive to be the perfect hostess. My husband on the other hand, has his own list of things he wants to do, such as working on the lawn and flower gardens, relaxing, enjoying himself so he can share the beauty of the flowers and lawn with our guests and be mentally prepared to lead the study. His agenda doesn’t usually match mine and I get frustrated and feel like what I am doing is most important and he should help me. I love to cook, just as he loves to garden but I view my cooking for the group as important and his gardening not important. I need to repent of this, and lower my expectations of him fulfilling my agenda. If I can’t do everything that I want to do perfectly, I should allow the guests to bring some of the food, or make a simple meal that doesn’t take hours of preparation. I have been learning to let go of my controlling spirit in this case and I realize that our friends come to see us and learn from our study, they don’t care if the house is perfectly cleaned or the meal is a gourmet meal or sandwiches.
4. I get anxious when I am over-tired or overworked, or when I realize there is not enough time to do everything that must be done (demands of work and travel combined with normal household tasks). I get behind on cleaning, laundry, organizing and then don’t take or find the time to do the most important things like studying God’s word, working out, etc. There are so many things that are left undone and as they pile up I get more anxious. Out of the three, my biggest idols are comfort and approval, although I didn’t realize how much I try to control.
5. I think Jesus would say to me, “Donna, Donna, you are anxious and troubled about many things; There is need of only one or but a few things (amplified version). Don’t neglect your time with me and let me give you the rest you need. Work on your relationship with me and you will find that some of the worries are not so important. Let me work on Tim’s heart, I don’t need your help, in fact, you are hindering the good work I want to do in him.”
6. I love the amplified version for vs 42 – Mary has chosen the good portion (that which is to her advantage), which shall not be taken away from her. Mary chose to spend time with Jesus, listening to his words and worshipping him — an eternal investment. Time spent with Jesus will change my heart and take away my anxiety. Time spent with Jesus will provide the comfort and approval that I long for. In the end, I won’t even remember the things that get me worried and upset now.
7. I can practice His presence by listening to Christian music while driving or working out, by listening to podcasts of great teaching while flying, reading the Bible and good Christian books, singing his praises and praying.
Excellent, honest — love the video — you could paint that because you’ve truly been there. Thank you, Donna.
I appreciate the honesty in saying, “I like my stone.” We do need to pray for God to give us a longing to have it removed.
Just to quickly clarify–I’m often too quick with words and can be confusing! I don’t like the sin in my heart at all, I daily feel the struggle of my spirit being willing but my flesh is so weak. What I meant by wanting to hold on to my stone is more the root of it, the control that I gravitate towards over and over! I DO want Him to transform me, I just have to admit I have been praying over my sin of control for SO many years!
Thank you all for your grace towards me!
Have you identified a deep idol that is behind your surface sin? If so, what would Jesus say to you?
*God has brought to mind this morning that I am bad at taking compliments..I even had a dear sister gently confront me with it a while ago. She said when she compliments me or when others do when I sing I am not good at accepting it and she is right. I guess I am telling you all so you can help me explore if this stems from my idol of approval or not. It has led to the point where I don’t have a strong desire to minister in song at church anymore..I can’t sift through why I am at this place right now, or what God is trying to teach me yet..
Rebecca I struggle with this too. I want approval (my stone) from others when I know I am already fully approved in Christ. Then when those that I want approval from compliment me I cannot receive it. What a mess I am! So can relate. I think there is a deep root of rejection that is working in me. Not sure. Praying for you in this. There is a balance for all of us.
6. What is the better thing Mary has chosen? (This is not a negative comment about serving, nor is it a separation of the sacred and the secular. It has to do with the heart and with the object of worship.)
* Patrick and I were talking about this last week..it isn’t about what we do..serving, working at a job, or ministering, etc..it is about the heart in whatever we do, it is doing it as unto the Lord..Mary was serving Jesus just by listening..She was loving Him, worshiping Him..The object of Martha’s worship were her idols of approval and control not Jesus, yet she was serving Him.
Could this be the answer to my question above? Hmmmm…How many things do we do at church in the name of service that are born out of a desire to serve our idol of approval, comfort, control…wow…ouch…Perhaps one of the red flags could be if while we are serving we start getting upset that so-in-so isn’t helping, or isn’t allowing me to serve where I feel most comfortable..or we begin to have a critical spirit toward the body at our church..When a critical spirit overrides a deep love for the body..those are red flags..
Rebecca,
Your post has answered something for me. Mary was serving Jesus by listening to Him. The object of Mary’s worship was Jesus.
One of the cross-ref. in my Bible for “For Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her” is Psalm 27:4:
“One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to meditate in His temple.” That was the desire of David’s heart, and it was Mary’s as well.
Then you said that although Martha was serving Jesus, the object of her worship was her own idols, or, herself.
That helps me with some of the things I’m wrestling with in identifying the deeper root problem behind my own sin.
I think my problem is the object of my worship is myself, alot of the time.
I feel like I’m peeling an onion, layer by layer, to get to the root; it’s painful, too, but so necessary.
Susan, WOW…I am right there with you sister..Every word you said. THANKS for Psalm 27..That brought a song to mind..There is a GREAT song for that passage..It is off of Waterdeep’s Enter the Worship Circle first circle CD.. This worship Cd has become one of my favorite ways to worship God.. What could be better than basking in the presence of the Lord..Certainly not baking bread and stressing out.. ;P
Here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlmYLUjvMRs
I am there with you ladies too! And I love Waterdeep, thanks for the song, Rebecca!
i just used that word picture with my dear husband, just when i think i have to be at the center of that onion i find that there are yet more layers of pride to allow Jesus to peel away!!! ugggggg
Rebecca, I think you have something here. Mary had a heart of worship toward the Lord. Martha could have had the same and expressed her worship in service. The fact that she did not is evidenced in her behavior.
5. Read Luke 10:41-42.
Reading this in a new way. I always thought that Jesus kind of admonished, not in a harsh way, Martha. But now I can hear the emotion and care and concern in His voice as He says, “Martha, Martha!”
I’ve been praying about what He would say to me.
Narrowing down my “stone” even further this morning (my thought-life)
is the stone of fantasizing and daydreaming, of just slipping away mentally. Another verse that came to mind this morning was Colossians 3:2; “(Susan), Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth.” I read this in the context of verses 1-10.
Verse 5 tells me I am dead to immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and greed; all of which amount to idolatry.
Perhaps Jesus would say to me, “Susan, Susan…stop running away from Me! I am here, in reality; this is where I will meet you.”
Elizabeth posted above, then clarified, about “liking her stone”.
I, too, don’t like my sin, but my stone has provided me comfort, relief from what I perceive as boredom, avoiding facing loneliness.
It will be a battle to give it up. But, I long to be free from this stone which is really a stronghold, a fortress, in my life.
1 Corinthians 10:4-5 tells me “For the weapons of our warfare are not physical (weapons of flesh and blood), but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds,
(Inasmuch as we) refute arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the (true) knowledge of God, and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ.”
I am hopeful this study will be one of those “mighty weapons of warfare”.
What is the deep idol behind this stone/sin?
It may well be comfort; instead of turning to the Lord to meet my needs and longings, I turn to daydreams and just letting my thoughts run wild. Approval – I can build myself up. I think it’s an unhealthy dose of “SELF” – self-absorption, self-centeredness, self-serving. Maybe it’s a battle of who is going to be Lord of my life – me, or God?
I am working on my questions and I’m up to #4 which has been THE question for the last week. What is my deep idol? I thought at first that I needed to work on being thankful. That seemed easy…but no. Easy is just the way I would go because my deep idol is comfort, unless God shows me otherwise. My friend Ruth has been going through trials since I have known her. For her whole life as far as I can tell, with God’s grace woven throughout. She accepts trials that I have thought were not her burdens to bear (because deep down I seek escape from mine). Now I see her as broken and poured out as a fragrant offering to the Lord. This, I think is how a life becomes beautiful.
The removal of this stone from my heart will be such a miraculous work of the Lord. It goes without saying that I’m scared (I’m always scared).
Now the question is where do I start. I have a sense it will be with food, not just in relation to me but to my family as well.
Be Thou my vision Oh Lord.
Anne
Praying you really know what God wants for you in this. All those directions you listed are great! There are so many things in me but I have to keep myself focused on just one for I will be so overwhelmed! So thankful for His grace and the cross.
1. Describe the setting in Luke 10:38-40, contrasting the two sisters. Find adjectives that describe each of them. Read carefully. Does the Vemeer painting to the left ring true — or how do you imagine the scene?
1. I would say yes, the Vemeer painting rings true. Martha was distracted by all the preparaions, Mary sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he had to say.
Vemeer pictures Jesus being alone, which I think was the situation because of the pronouns “he and him” in verse 38. If that was true, Martha’s anxiety seems particularly out of order. Chuck Swindoll said, “Martha, Martha, chips and dip would be fine.” But even if all the disciples were there, she is still out of line. Let’s look for the deep idol in her heart, and perhaps we will also see our own.
2. Jim Om says there are two signs of manipulation — and at least one is always present in manipulation. Here, in Martha’s words to Jesus, see if you can find:
A. Trying to use guilt: Martha was trying to use guilt in her words, “Lord, don’t you care?”
B. Giving an order: “Tell her to help me.”
3. When we get anxious about something, it is often a red flag that our idol is operating. We are afraid we are not going to get what our idol promises. In Martha’s case, she really may have been thinking about her reputation as a hostess. This was an important guest and she wanted people to notice — so it could have been approval. Because manipulation is involved, it may also have been control. She thought she knew better than Jesus what was needed. What do you think was her deep idol? Do you identify in any way with longing for approval or control? If so, share.
I think Martha’s deep idol may have been recognition, she may have wanted to be known as the best hostess, her service may have become about her, seeing it seemed a bit excessive especially if Jesus and Mary were the only ones there. She might have been looking for approval from Jesus about what a great servant she was!
The more I study this, the more I see even a bigger stone in me of approval. When I first remember this story, maybe as a teen, I related to Mary. I was not the over-achieving one, and I wanted to sit at Hi feet. But as I got older I became more and more like Martha, especially in relation to not just my Lord, but my family and freinds. And I ask why–I believe it is my insecurities and therefore deep desire for approval. When I read the scripture now, I ache for Martha because what I see in her is this heart that love Jesus but doesn’t feel like she alone has anything worthwhile to offer so she must DO something, be productive, be helpful, serving, etc…do the good works because surely just sitting at His feet, she just isn’t spiritual enough/good enough–does that make sense?
My 5 reasons for wanting this stone of approval (and still control!) removed:
1. It keeps me from sitting with Him and experiencing His love for me.
2. It keeps me so busy at home that my family gets a worn out wife/mom more often than a fun and peaceful one.
3. I base my self worth on what I’ve accomplished and remind my husband of “all I’ve done” when he would rather see His spirit of grace and love in me.
4. It leads to a critical spirit towards my family when they don’t do enough to help.
5. It grieves Him.
Elizabeth, I wonder if the expectations of our culture (and church) are what moved you from being like Mary to more like Martha.
Good question Anne!
Elizabeth, I too, had compassion on “Martha” after thinking about her. Your comments about her possible low self-esteem made me rethink about Martha’s possible motives. Thanks Elizabeth!
Love your list here of 5 things. With my struggle of approval I can see these in my own life as well. Glad to not be alone in this.
This morning after reading the blog again, I am struck with a thought of “the work still needs to get done!” I am not sure how to balance out what needs to be done with taking the time to sit at the feet of Jesus. Last night, after working out and having dinner, I decided to sit at the feet of Jesus for a while, but there were dishes to do, laundry to fold, more work (job) to accomplish on my computer… and it doesn’t just magically go away. It is hard to do both, and it is hard to see a family member sit and relax when help is really needed… Does this make sense?
Oh my, you just said what i feel EVER DAY how can i do all i need to do and still sit, i think the key is to give a little time to JUST SIT and the rest of the time to let our heart sit at his feet as we wash and clean and drive and serve! ITS MY HEART THAT HE WANTS honestly i can serve with a loving listening heart or i can bang counters and fuss……
I love that Cyndi, let our heart sit at the feet of Jesus while we work and serve!
I know my comments are “Martha” comments. But I just wonder if Martha was discouraged with the thought that if both sisters pulled together things could be done easily and quickly then they could both sit at the feet of Jesus together.
Donna, I know I definitely think that about some things — wish some people would do “their share” of the work…. but I also know there are some areas in which other people think that about me. I wonder if part of this is learning to appreciate people for who they are/gifts they have vs expecting everyone to contribute to my priorities. It’s good that our gifts and priorities differ or some stuff would never get done!
I also realize that I might prevent people from contributing because of perfectionism, especially when faced with deadlines: Lately I’ve found myself delegating less because I can do a few tasks better/quicker myself.
I agree, I need to learn to appreciate other’s priorities!! I am far from a perfectionist though, I tend to let things slide… I would love to have a “work together” situation though with all the chores (not just mine) so we then relax together :).
Oh, I let a lot slide 🙂 I tend to be “all or nothing.” Perfectionist or disaster! When I’m focused on some things, I ignore what’s falling apart around me. And if others do the same, but with different priorities, we could drive each other bonkers. So, this is helping me see the need to be gracious to those who annoy me, because I probably am annoying them even worse!
Oh Donna–I so relate! And maybe that’s what I meant by wanting to hold on to my stone–it feels GOOD to be so productive, and I know I serve my family well…but at night I lay there thinking I should have spent more time with Him, more time at rest…I was recently very sick and in the ER…after the whole several week ordeal, and I finally felt “normal’ again, my husband actually said he missed the way when I was sick I just rested with him on the couch and seemed so much more peaceful. Talk about convicting!
Elizabeth, Great example! Sometimes I miss the very hard times in my own life when I was forced to be still.
Anne, I agree with our culture having an influence on my thinking. When I was younger I saw Martha as a control-freak type and very annoying, but over the years I started to see the value in doing and serving–it just gets out of balance at times. I know Martha has an attitude of sin here, but I also have a little more compassion towards her than I used to. Maybe I’m being too easy on her, but I know I struggle to find the balance of serving and also “sitting at His feet”. But back to my root stone, I do like the praise I get for serving, that boost in my sense of approval is what keeps me stuck in the cycle….and as Donna somewhat said, it needs to be done, who else will do it? Maybe I’m rationalizing, but I feel better with a clean orderly house, and no one will do it but me, truly. It’s just a problem when it takes the place of my time with Him.
Elizabeth, I agree, I also have compassion for Martha. Perhaps we are just starting to have the compassion that Jesus had for her. I just wonder if she also struggled with understanding how to do both?
I’m appreciating the comments re: work needing to get done — and “if I’m not going to do it, who will?” I am buried in work right now and have been (very slowly) learning to assess what NEEDS to get done and what needs to get done by me. So much that I would like to get done is being neglected.
Dee, You laid everything out so clearly in the blog above. It’s so obvious to me (and most likely to others, too) that my biggest stone is control. One of the reasons I had been stuck is because I was focusing on the truck full of gravel related to control, rather than the boulder of control itself. And focusing on the gravel just led to a zillion more things on the to-do list. And more things on the to-do list takes me away from intimacy with Jesus. (I had been thinking of picking something like “get dressed by noon everyday” or maybe “get dressed some days.” Won’t get into why, for me, that’s more a reflection of control than comfort.)
Paige, good to see you back. I remember when you were around from the days I was more faithful in posting here. Fellowsojourner, thanks for your comment last week 🙂
A ton of thoughts rolling around in my brain; I’m glad I’m familiar with the story of Mary and Martha, because that clarifies A LOT. But I’d like to get into the Bible Study before babbling more! Maybe I’ll even get dressed 🙂
My thoughts is that this story is not about serving versus sitting with Jesus, but about idols of the heart. The last time we see Martha, in John 12, she is still serving, but her idol has been broken. It’s fascinating — just to whet your taste for where we will be in three weeks or so…
Wow. In 2 sentences you gave me a completely new perspective! I am so blessed by your wisdom Dee!
Tender teachable heart!
Cool 🙂
I can’t wait! That’s what I love about the Bible, the story continues to unfold and the understanding increases as you read… why do I let it sit unopened for long stretches when it is so wonderful to read? Thank you Dee.
Reading and meditating on Luke 10:38-42 may be about control and approval for Martha, and I find myself doing the very same thing, fusing about to make things perfect for the meal or the house when I have company, instead of just sitting and visiting and listening to others. But the work still has to get done and someone has to do it, so it puts you in a hard spot. I can identify with Martha.
But what I’m taking away from these verses in Luke is that I need to take the time for the Lord first and then the work will get done later. Perhaps if Martha sat and listened to Jesus teach with Mary first, the meal would of been taken care of somehow. After all he did perform miracles with food before!
Jesus says to Martha “One thing is needful, Mary has chosen the good portion, which shall not be taken away from her.” In other words, he is saying to her that the teaching of God is most needful and Mary has chosen that first, and that will not be taken from her…it will remain in her heart forever.
I see what you mean Joyce. Hearing the word of the Lord was more important for Mary than what they would eat. She was partaking of the Bread of Life. Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added unto you.
I am cut deeply by all of the times I have been critical of others. Even if they were wrong criticism was not the way to handle it, whether spoken or thought. I have also been on the receiving end at work lately and I see how destructive it is, as much for the giver as the receiver.
Have you identified a deep idol that is behind your surface sin? If so, what would Jesus say to you?
As I prayed and waited upon the Lord today regarding what He would say to me and asking for revelation concerning the deep idol(s) in my life, I was overwhelmed with how much of what I do ends up with wrong heart motivation. I may start out with good intentions and motives, but somewhere along the line I want to be noticed for what I am doing and I want what I am doing to fix my circumstances – I want to see the end and know that everything will be alright. This insight helps me see the deep idol(s) of control and acceptance engulfing my heart.
The Lord would say to me: “Paige, Paige – you are My beloved and you are covered in My righteousness. This, and only this, makes you acceptable to the Father. Nothing you do can make you loved or accepted anymore than you already are. My love for you is perfect love that casts out all fear and frees you to serve as worship to me – whether anyone else notices your service or not. I am sovereign and in full control of your life. Allow me to lead you as your good shepherd.”
That’s so good, Paige.
Love what the Lord would say to you Paige, and I know you are right.
I was reading in Luke, looking for adjectives about Mary and Martha — and read that Martha was “distracted.” Frequently, “distracted” is an accurate word to describe me. As I continued to read, verses 41 and 42 (“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one), the phrase “one thing” was so prominent.
Psalm 27:4 says, “One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.”
That’s what Mary was doing — gazing on the Lord’s beauty. It’s hard to gaze and be distracted at the same time.
I also thought of the song by Selah, One Thing I Know (so listened to it in iTunes on my computer). From the chorus,
“And if there’s one thing I know
It’s that you were never left alone
‘Cause you can always on Jesus’ name
And if there’s one thing I pray
It’s that Jesus helps you find a way
To make a change . . .”
I’m going to bed tonight thinking about “One Thing,” gazing on His beauty and seeking Him.
That’s good. I’ve been ministering in prisons and often find more life in the prison than out, and I think that is because everything else has been taken away, and if they find Jesus, they really center on Him.
I agree here Dee. I have had the privilege of serving women in prison as well. To see them worship just makes me cry. So pure and true. A love for Him that I sometimes let fall away. It is a blessing to have things taken away so we can truly behold Him not other worldly things.
7. It is never enough to allow a stone to be taken out, we must run to the real God, as Mary is doing, developing her love relationship with Jesus, “hanging” as The Message puts it, “on His every word.” How might you “practice His presence,” even as you are getting ready in the morning, driving to work, caring for children…
* There is power in His word…He is His word..It is living and active..For me, I need to review my memory verses and get back into memorizing new ones. This time I am going to pinpoint specific passages/verses that will help me as God chips away at this idol..
* Praying constantly..This is one area of my relationship with God that He has made stronger since I started doing Dee’s studies..I want that to continue.
* Singing to Him, maybe also with some of the verses I am memorizing or as I continue to experiment with writing songs..
* Praying for my boys as things pop up..being more aware of opportunities to be Jesus to them in instructing them as issues rise up among them. Seizing every ‘turmoil’ moment like when they fight as an opportunity to ask them questions to help them keep their eyes on Jesus rather than on their brothers issues..Finding verses for them to memorize that deal directly with their issues..
6. What is the better thing Mary has chosen? (This is not a negative comment about serving, nor is it a separation of the sacred and the secular. It has to do with the heart and the object of worship).
“But the Lord answered and said to her, Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; but only a few things are necessary, really only one, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.”
I believe the better thing Mary has chosen is to love the Lord with all her heart, with all her mind, with all her strength.
Thank you Dee, for your perspective, that this is not about service vs. sitting…. The discussion above in the blog was about how do we balance – it is obvious that we are to work, we all have work that must be done every day. But if our focus gets skewed so that that is what life becomes all about, we are missing the eternal perspective.
Mary kept her eyes on what would matter for all eternity; and I like how Jesus said what she chose to do “would not be taken away from her”; which to me, alludes to what Jesus said about our treasure, and how what is stored up for us in heaven will not be stolen, nor destroyed by moth or rust. And, for the rest of her earthly life, she also had a sweet memory that was never taken from her.
I think that Martha, too, could have chosen the better thing, too; had she not focused on her need for control, or approval, but rather perhaps baked her Lord a simple loaf of bread, as an expression of her love for Him.
7. How might you “practice His presence”…..
I think just reminding myself and believing His Word, which says that I am always in His presence – I never “go in and out” of His presence; He lives in me by His Spirit.
I like to pray to be more sensitive to the leadings of the Spirit, to hear God in the everyday things of life.
A cool memory I have is many years ago, being in the ER with chest pain, waiting in triage, and I was anxious and scared. I was sitting there with my eyes closed, saying the verse from Isaiah to myself, over and over, “For I am the Lord, Your God, Who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, do not be afraid; I Myself will help you.”
Suddenly I felt a big warm hand on top of my hand. I looked up and there was my dad; it was his hand on mine; yet, I felt the Lord reassure me that He was there; His hand was reaching out to me through my dad’s hand.
I love this story. How good of God. thanks for sharing it, Susan.
Susan, totally love this story..Love your heart and Loved what you said that you never go ‘in and out’ of his presence.
Your story touched my heart!
I like Jesus’ passion for Martha as Dee said when something is repeated twice it is passionate..In the midst of her idolic heart Jesus still had passion for her…He still pursued her..and he has passion for Mary too..I am just saying in this passage it stuck out to me that He didn’t give up or become angry or demeaning to Martha, instead He taught her with a loving passion..He has that kind of passion for each one of us..Even in the midst of our idolic hearts..
It cracks me up when I see Martha in myself..Thinking the better thing is to sit at the feet of my idol clinging to ‘every word’ it says….What my idol offers is chaff..It doesn’t last…My idol gives me trash..things that may bring temporary comfort, but will burn up in the end..Jesus gives me life..When He is the idol of my heart the treasures He gives are eternal, life giving..
Rebecca, thank you for the encouragement in reminding us that Jesus does not give up on us, but that He passionately runs after us!
6. What is the better thing Mary has chosen? (This is not a negative comment about serving, nor is it a separation of the sacred and the secular. It has to do with the heart and with the object of worship.)
Mary chose to sit at Jesus feet and hear what He had to say – waiting upon Him.
I find it interesting that Martha, blessed with the gift of hospitality, invites Jesus over and then becomes so caught up in the “details” that she ignores her guest. I can identify with this. I love to have people over and often get distracted with the meal, preparations, etc and don’t take time to sit and fellowship with those I have invited in to my home.
In Beth Moore’s devotional book, “To Live is Christ”, she talks about “Pharisees” and how the term was meant to represent genuine piety and deep devotion to God, but in Matthew 23 Jesus gives a rundown of what had become of them and the motivation of their hearts: they made demands of others that they themselves did not keep (v. 4), they made their religious actions into show to impress others (v. 5); they loved to be the center of attention (v. 6). I had never thought of myself in reading this before – until today – and I am so thankful that God is faithful to reveal these areas of weakness, sin and failure in me and that He doesn’t leave me here, but He cleanses me, forgives me, and helps me to live as I should – with genuine piety and deep devotion to Him!
I read this in Matt 23 and that really helped me to understand. Thank you for that!
6. What is the better thing Mary has chosen?
Mary treasured Him. She knew only He could fill the holes in her heart, He was better than her favorite foods, the best TV shows, better than a gleaming couter top and labeled boxes in an organized pantry…He is the One who is worthy.
I feel so convicted today, but it is good. I need to call my busy-ness and controlling nature, what it is, an idols that has kept me from daily time alone with Him lately. I manage to exercise without fail and keep everyone well fed, and the house tidy…but my quiet times have been squeezed short, if at all lately. Nothing can satisfy but Christ alone.
I found an old favorite quote I want to share that inspires me, hope it may encourage others too. It was in A Chance To Die (Elisabeth Elliot on Amy Carmichael) but the quote is from Bishop Moule:
“To be like Christ. To displace self from the inner throne, and to enthrone Him; to make not the slightest compromise with the smallest sin. We aim at nothing less than to walk with God all day long, to bide every hour in Christ and He and His words in us, to love God with all the heart and our neighbor as ourselves… It is possible to cast every care on Him daily, and to be at peace amidst pressure, to see the will of God in everything, to put away all bitterness and clamor and evil speaking, daily and hourly. It is possible by unreserved resort to divine power under divine conditions to become strongest through and through at our weakest point.”
Thank you so much for that quote, I love it and wish I could be that dedicated.
I didn’t get to edit in time, but what I mean is that I am realizing how much I have rationalized my SIN lately instead of calling it what it is. This study has really helped me to see the heart motive in what I am spending so much energy on, and how I have enthroned my Self..ugh! I am thankful for conviction though, and His grace, just humbled by how I have let my quiet times slide and have become so self righteous in my “works”…all the while missing what truly satisfies!
Okay well I am taking a stab at this and will read back the other comments before mine. Oh first I pray I will be able to keep up with this. I do think there is an idol of the need for approval in me. I want it worked out.
1-Two adjectives…
Mary – Listened as she sat
Martha – Distracted as she served
Cannot listen too well when dealing with distraction.
The painting- Jesus face is interesting to me. It almost looks like He is grieved somewhat by that response.
2-guilt -Lord, do you not care? I am doing this all alone.
Order -Make her help me.
3-her idol may have been both. Approval need and control need. Maybe perfectionism.
I can identify longing for approval. Facebook and twitter is where some of this happens. It is so stupid but it is hurtful when I see others ignoring me and hanging with others online…So dumb really cuz it is online. I just want to exult Christ that other stuff should not matter. God is using this stuff to work it out.
4-Choose Christ!
5- Angela, Angela do you not realize I delight in you and that is all that matters. Keep your focus on me not others…Follow Me!
6-Mary choose to sit at Jesus feet and listen…
7-Practicing His prescence…love that! Praying about accountability partner. 🙂