Jesus wasn’t talking about the grief that follows the loss of a loved one, which might surprise many greeting card companies! Though it is true that the Lord is close to the broken-hearted, here Jesus is talking about what follows being “poor in Spirit.” It is the ability to recognize sin in your life and truly repent. True repentance goes beyond asking for forgiveness to mourning breaking the heart of God and longing for reconciliation with Him. As Bernard of Clairvaux put it: “God is a shy Lover, and when He sees us in the arms of another, He backs away.” When we grieve the loss of fellowship with Him, repent of our sin with a true U-Turn, we also experience true reconciliation.
And that brings joy!
So though it doesn’t sound fun to truly mourn our sin, true mourning for sin causes His Spirit to rise in us like the rising sun dispels the darkness. When I truly mourned my sin of manipulation and did a U-Turn, all of my relationships, including my relationship with my sweet Jesus improved and God flooded my heart with light. Indeed, I was and am comforted.
Colin Smith explains that because of the depravity of our hearts, we are often blind to our sin, so we must ask God to open our eyes. The psalmist says:
So one thing we will do this week is to look at some key passages that can illumine sin, and ask:
Is there a warning here I should heed?
We also can gain insight by asking those we trust to tell us what we cannot see.
Colin Smith asked his wife if she would point out a flaw or sin of his he might not see.
She hesitated, and then said, “Can I name two?”
They both laughed. (A good marriage!)
I asked my daughter Annie the same question, and she told me I grieve more over eating habits than other things — and I know that is true. I know it is important to take care of my body, but much vanity is mixed into that — and I often care more about the sin of bad eating than the sin of unkind thoughts. So I am concentrating on crying out to help for my thought life, which matters so much to God.
Indeed, if we are poor in Spirit, we are willing to ask such a question of someone we trust.
So our second and challenging assignment will be to ask that question and be willing to respond, for Proverbs tells us:
Sunday:
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
Monday: Godly Sorrow
Colin Smith says the reason we repeat the same sin is because we don’t know how to repent with hope — instead we just condemn ourselves, as Judas did. Believing that a true U-Turn will lead to joy will give us strength. Allen Redpath said “God has not promised to forgive one sin of which you are not willing to repent.” The degree to which we believe God will meet us with love and joy is what will give momentum to our repentance.
4. Meditate on 2 Corinthians 7:8-11
A. Why, according to verses 8-9, does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused?
B. What, according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow?
C. Challenge question: Give an example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer. (And try to use different illustrations than your sisters have already used!)
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control?
E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see?
5. Share a time when true repentance led to comfort from the Lord.
Tuesday: How To Truly Mourn Sin
6. Colin Smith says to think about a sin in your life and go through these steps:
A. How, if you had truly repented of this sin long ago and turned from it, might your life be different? More fruitful?
B. What kind of pain has this sin brought to yourself? To others?
C. How has it grieved God?
7. What would a true U-Turn look like, and what measures might you take to strengthen the turn?
8. Look at the sins in Proverbs 6:16-19 and ask the Lord to show you if any are true in your life.
Wednesday: Overcoming the Deception of “Enjoyable” Sins
Whether it is lust, gluttony, gossip — it is hard to give it up. But indeed, we are being deceived, for the pleasure is momentary and then it turns around to cut us to pieces. Proverbs sheds light on this.
9. What do we lose by persisting in an “enjoyable sin” according to Proverbs 1:22-33? Find everything you can.
10, What will godly wisdom save you from according to Proverbs 2:12-22?
11. Idolatry is always involved, as you are choosing to meet your needs your way instead of God’s ways. How can you speak to your soul about how God can truly meet this need you are trying to meet through rebellion?
12. Action Assignment: Ask someone you love and trust to tell you about a sin they see in your life. Report back.
Thursday-Friday: Message from Colin Smith
13. Listen to the above and share your notes and comments.
14. Is there a way the Spirit of God spoke to your heart through this? If so, how?
Saturday:
15. What is your take-a-way for the week and why?
84 comments
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
I sooo need this and am already thinking of asking my husband.
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
Asking for forgiveness is easy..I don’t need to process what the cost really is-how it grieved God. It is like putting a bandaid over a small cut, the bandaid falls off and the cut is oozing and infected. Those cuts would do better out in the open where they can heal. Mourning is the opposite. I don’t quickly cover it up and hide from God. I process that sin before God bringing it into the light and not only am I healing my relationship with God but with others as Dee mentioned in this post.
Also, merely asking for forgiveness might be like a double whammy of grief for God. Not only is my sin putting a rock in the stream of intimacy but on top of that I am grieving God deeper because I can’t trust His love for me as I processing my sin and letting Him take my scales off. Heck what is worse is I am denying the Gospel-His sacrifice for me.
So good and so like Rebecca!
He said it is worry.. and that came right away after I asked. SO true..he is right.
🙂
Sunday
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
Those who mourn “is talking about the ability to recognize sin in your life and truly repent.” “True repentance goes beyond asking for forgiveness to mourning breaking the heart of God and longing for reconciliation with Him.” I read this and think how far and long will God back away as Bernard Clairvaux said? I know there are many times I ask for forgiveness and feel that I have repented only to do it again! Was I truly not repentant or mourning my sin? I really struggle with this as it is my hearts desire to have a right relationship with the Lord. I don’t want to justify or excuse my actions of falling back into that sin in saying “I’m only human.”
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
I think mourning a sin is coming to the realization that what you’ve done has broken God’s heart and asking for forgiveness can be so flippant…just a motion we go through to make ourselves feel better, so we think. Or even asking for forgiveness just because we got caught with our hands in the cookie jar. It’s a matter of our heart, our motive and how we get there baffles me at times. I see more and more why the first Beatitude is first.
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
I am just so thankful from where God has brought us since Hurricane Florence in September. Basically a new house on the inside, able to get all the trees removed that could pose a threat in the future, getting the outside of our house painted and my husband and son putting on new shutters around the windows yesterday. A definite reminder of God’s faithfulness pulling us up and through in His amazing way!
Wonderful to hear of all the restoration and good work by husband and son too!
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
This stands out: “True repentance goes beyond asking for forgiveness to mourning breaking the heart of God and longing for reconciliation with Him.” This sentence helps me understand what sin is & does to God and my relationship with Him. It also makes me long for Him more. It takes the focus off me, my shame or trying to fix things myself and points me toward Him, the One who provided and provides reconciliation.
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
Asking for forgiveness is a good thing (I guess it depends on what all goes with it) but without mourning a sin, I’m likely to do the same thing over and over. Plus, mourning points me to Jesus. He’s the one who not only forgives but draws me to Himself and provides strength to overcome sinful patterns of thought and behavior.
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
I’ve spied God in my life almost constantly during the past week, partly because my emotions have been pretty close to the surface — and that’s when I feel desperate enough to regularly look for His work in my life. I realized this morning that I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach in a specific situation (alot and very regularly). I ignore it unless it’s enhanced by being sick or tired. This morning, I wasn’t sick or tired but I was faced with a slightly new/different situation. After feeling this physical feeling of anxiety (or ??) for a few hours, I realized how much God has blessed me, having His hand on a very slow house-fixing & moving process so that I still am in familiar situations with people I trust who point me to Him.
“Mourning points me to Jesus” so good.
Good processing too after anxiety….
1. What stood out? My need to ask my husband and possibly my daughter what sin they see in my life that I’m blind to. I don’t have as much joy and intimacy with God as I used to. This would be a good place to start searching for why.
2. The difference between asking forgiveness and mourning a sin. Two things come to mind. The first is the saying “it’s easier to ask forgiveness than to ask for permission”, in other words I know I shouldn’t but I’m going to anyway. The second is having heard a parent say they went to discipline a child and the child’s confession consisted of ‘I’m sorry you caught me’. That isn’t repentance. It is wanting to avoid the consequences. Not feeling the full weight of what we did, which is what mourning our sin does.
3. I went to Spanish club yesterday, and a woman I haven’t seen in some time was there. She welcomed me warmly, and for this student who struggles so to learn Spanish, it was a big encouragement.
Dee, what you said about “we don’t know how to repent with hope” is so true. How do I know when I’ve felt bad enough? How do I not have it in the back of my mind that I know He’s going to forgive me anyway?
4.a. Paul did not regret the sorrow he caused because it led the Corinthians to godly repentance.
b. The difference between godly sorrow and worldly sorrow in vs 10. Godly sorrow brings repentance while worldly sorrow brings death.
c. Examples of both in the Bible. Jonah 3:6-9, the Ninevites from the king on down covered themselves with sackcloth, fasted, and repented. This passage ends with the king saying “God may yet relent and with compassion turn from His fierce anger so that we will not perish.” The king knew enough of God to truly repent hope for life while well aware that the other alternative was death.
d. Godly sorrow is not damage control. It brings us to a place where God can put a new spirit inside us, Ezk 18:31. Damage control seeks to mitigate the consequences, to lesson the offense somehow. Damage control is willing to lie to achieve it’s goal. Godly sorrow admits freely all wrong done.
e. Godly sorrow produces earnestness, eagerness to be cleared, readiness to see justice done, as well as alarm, longing and concern.
Love the illustrations from Jonah!
I lost my raft in a storm and was feeling sorry for myself that I cannot keep boats, piers, rafts…and that verse from Jonah came to mind about him being more concerned about losing the shade of that vine than of souls lost….
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
Ouch…this is scary territory; asking someone about my sin?
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
I guess asking forgiveness would mean the other person gives grace to me by forgiving me for what I have done. Mourning a sin is more about me struggling with the sin and realizing the pain I have caused others including God (depending on what exactly the sin happens to be).
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
Yesterday my husband and I had a brief reprieve from the toddlers (can’t really call them babies anymore), and dove into the Atlantic Ocean, which was extremely rough. We jumped the waves and swam together for about 30 minutes. I had so much fun and felt like I was a teenager! It was sweet.
Love your God Hunt!
I love the idea of your sweet reprieve. We live only 40 minutes from Lake Michigan, but only get there 1-2 times/year. My husband never goes. Maybe I can get him to sometime this summer. We could use a sweet reprieve as well 🙂
I say “Do it!”
4. Meditate on 2 Corinthians 7:8-11
A. Why, according to verses 8-9, does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused?
Because it led them to repentance.
B. What, according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow?
godly sorry is sorrow over sin that stifles our intimacy with God – it is God focused. Worldly sorrow is self focused and can lead to physical death because of stress filling us with worry and anger which can make us sick. It definitely leads to spiritual death because it is focused on self-pity, worrying about what others think, a lot of shame, and guilt-unbelief.
C. Challenge question: Give an example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer. (And try to use different illustrations than your sisters have already used!)
Godly: The woman who was a sinner and came to Jesus weeping at his feet, wiping his feet with her hair and then breaking her most expensive alabaster jar of perfume rubbing it on his feet. Worldly: Abel’s sacrifice pleased God but Cain’s sacrifice didn’t so he responded with anger instead of asking God to show him why-his heart condition-and then repent and turn, he became angry and let sin in and it kept growing.
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control?
godly sorrow is an abandonment of self before God -a true desire to be restored to God and others. The proof is in what comes after-the fruit- for there will be growth and beauty. Damage control is an attempt to quickly be-rid oneself of guilt, consequences, and to make it go away fast as to not endure any pain. There is no growth or sense of godly joy in this person in the end.
E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see? His comfort-His joy and the growing desire for His joy-that peace and contentedness when we are clean. There is also the fruit of other-ness. We long to be around our brothers and sisters more and are free to love and serve others and care about the things God cares about.
Great illustrations, Rebecca!
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
Psalm 119:105-There is an Amy Grant song titled, ‘Thy Word’ that was sung at my wedding. God’s Word does light our path and expose sin. We can trust Him to lead us.
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
To me, mourning a sin means you feel sick inside about what you’ve done and want to receive forgiveness to mend what’s been broken.
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
We were blessed to take our 90 year old friend from church, home last night. We are on the schedule for August to bring him to church. He loves the Lord and we are blessed to know him. I see the Lord working in relationships in my family and friends.
Love that Thy Word was sung at your wedding!
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin? I have thought a lot about this in the past few years as I have struggled in this area…I see 3 levels or depths to my awareness of or sorrow for my sin. In the first…I might offer a simple apology (and in some cases that would be ok). But often a simple “Sorry” is like poring gasoline on the fire! If I have sinned repeatedly in the same area for example, an apology alone offers nothing. Then there is asking someone for their forgiveness which goes deeper in acknowledging I have committed a wrongdoing and need to be forgiven to have fellowship restored. But it is only when I am struck by the full force of the depth and significance of my own sin that I am moved to cry out in godly sorrow and ask the Lord to change me and create in me a clean heart.
I like this description of the levels of seeking forgiveness. My eleven year old recently gave me opportunity to discuss this with her when she commented that she may be required to apologize, but she didn’t have to mean it.
Hi Chris…I used to say the same thing as a child…and honestly still do sometimes as an adult…I’ve just learned to dress it up a bit now! Only the Holy Spirit can bring conviction and a desire for repentance in my heart. Lord, may I pray for this conviction daily so I can keep a pure heart before You. Amen
Hi Lucy! Yes, I have to admit I’m sure I do the same. The self-righteous attitude creeps up in me if I do not keep guard of my heart. Knowing I struggle with this helps me to turn to the Lord for help- but boy, must this struggle never get easier??
Umm, This kinda bugs me: “Allen Redpath said ‘God has not promised to forgive one sin of which you are not willing to repent.'” I grew up, often terrified, believing that I had to “become a Christian” everytime I heard a hellfire and brimstone sermon or something that really pulled out the guilt feeling. I’m not sure of the original context of this statement though. While I agree with the importance of repentance, I also believe that unforgiven sin is enough to keep me from eternity with Him. Someone this statement causes me to think of my own inadequacy at repentance that God’s mercy and forgiveness. I have to believe that in Christ alone, my sins are forgiven rather than that I’m not repenting “right” or that one sin …. (feels kinda hopeless vs “repentance with hope”)
???Clarification of above???
4. Meditate on 2 Corinthians 7:8-11
A. Why, according to verses 8-9, does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused? because sorrow (to the extreme) forces people to rely on God rather than themselves (oops! That was based on 2 Cor 1:8-9 but I needed the reminder 🙂 !!). The correct chapter: godly grief leads to repentance
B. What, according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow? godly sorrow –> repentance –> salvation without regret; worldly sorrow –> death
C. Challenge question: Give an example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer. (And try to use different illustrations than your sisters have already used!)David & Bathsheba: first, he was more sorry he got caught and tried to “fix it” — and was not in good shape. Godly sorrow lead to repentance. After Nathan confronted him about his sin, David repented.David described both in Psalm 32: (What is standing out to me right now about the passage below is God’s involvement in David’s life when he wasn’t acknowledging his sin; i.e., God’s hand was heavy upon him.)
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control? It requires acknowledging the truth about God’s holiness and one’s own sinfulness — Godly sorrow is healing. Damage control leads to death, spiritually, emotionally, physically.E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? earnestness (ok, I guess I get this) and also “eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing,what zeal, what punishment!” (???? The little commentary blurb in ESV Study Bible says “zeal for godliness” — but Paul uses a lot of words to say “zeal for godliness” and I don’t understand all those words in this context ????)
Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see? that the passage (especially after discussing mourning) is a whole lot easier to understand than 2 Cor 7:11 🙂 COMFORT!
Correction: “SomeHOW this statement causes me to think more of my own inadequacy at repentance thaN God’s mercy and forgiveness.” I used wonder “what if I die before I have time (or remembered) to confess a sin.” The statement I mentioned earlier sorta brings back that memory. (probably more typos in there, too)
Like that you are making us think about Redpath’s comment!
Renee, I don’t understand what you mean by this: “I also believe that unforgiven sin is enough to keep me from eternity with Him.” This kind of sounds like what I was taught when I was a Catholic, that if I die with unconfessed/unforgiven sin, then I won’t make it to heaven (hell or purgatory depending on if it’s venial or mortal sin). Do you mean an unbeliever who dies with unforgiven sin, or a believer who has not confessed and received forgiveness for a sin?
Susan, I’m glad you asked because dying with unconfessed sin is NOT what I mean, although that used to scare me way back when. I mean, in general, that unforgiven sin keeps us from the presence of God because He is holy. As believers, we are forgiven because of HIM. That’s why I disagree with Redpath’s statement. It sounds like he is saying that if I don’t repent “right,” I am not forgiven. Yet forgiveness is necessary to be in the presence of a Holy God. That is, I NEED to be forgiven based on what Jesus has done, rather than by having my forgiveness fluctuate based on my own behavior. My salvation DEPENDS on His forgiveness (and I AM forgiven!). If I have to worry that I may have forgotten to repent of something or didn’t repent in the right way and therefore am not forgiven, I could just as well give up now because I most likely will forget to repent of something. I don’t like the idea of conditional forgiveness that depends on my perfection (ain’t gonna happen!).Make sense? Hopefully, this isn’t even more confusing than what I wrote before!!! (because I’m not sure that I’m expressing myself clearly and I do have the ability to talk in circles). Oh, and I also believe that unconfessed sin (and lack of repentance) hurts our fellowship/relationship with God.
Thank you for clarifying, Renee!
Monday
4. Meditate on 2 Corinthians 7:8-11
A. Why, according to verses 8-9 does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused?
Because the pain of what Paul said in the letter caused them to repent and change their ways. It caused a sorrow that God wants His people to have, so they weren’t harmed by Paul in any way.
B. What according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow?
The kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation…there’s no regret for that kind of sorrow.
Worldly sorrow, lacks repentance and results in spiritual death.
C. Challenge question: Give an example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer. (And try to use different illustrations then your sisters have already used !)
Worldly sorrow…when Saul disobeyed the Lord and didn’t completely slaughter the Amalekite nation including all animals. In 1 Samuel 15:13 Samuel finally found Saul who greeted him cheerfully saying “I have carried out the Lord’s command.” To which Samuel responded “then what is all the bleating of sheep and goats and lowing of cattle I hear?” Saul gives one excuse after the other. Samuel does tell Saul that obedience is better than sacrifice… Saul does ask for forgiveness but still blames his disobedience on the people.
Godly sorrow…when Peter heard the crow three times and remembered what Jesus said, he went out and wept bitterly. Matthew 26:74-75
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control?
Godly sorrow will bring about a change. Damage control just puts a bandaid on it.
E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see?
Earnestness, concern to clear yourselves, indignation, alarm, longing to see Paul, zeal and readiness to punish wrong. Showing you have done everything necessary to make things right.
This fruit produced happiness and comfort.
5. Share a time when true repentance led to comfort from the Lord.
Treating a person unkindly and feeling just sick to my stomach for what I’d said. Not only did I ask God for forgiveness but I knew I needed to that ask that person for forgiveness and let them know how sorry I was. It really did bring comfort and relief.
I love the example of Saul…that has long been a favorite passage…what is this bleating of sheep I hear in my ears! God is so good to put stories in Scripture that reveal our own nature in maybe a bit of a lighthearted way that makes it easier to see😊
Love your tender heart, Sharon!
A. Why, according to verses 8-9, does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused?
It turned the people around.
B. What, according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow?
Godly sorrow has a true repentance about it.
C. Challenge question: Give an example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer. (And try to use different illustrations than your sisters have already used!)
I hope I am not coming up with the same things as others; I haven’t peeked!
Godly sorrow:
“When Judas, who had betrayed him, realized that Jesus had been condemned to die, he was filled with remorse. So he took the thirty pieces of silver back to the leading priests and the elders. “I have sinned,” he declared, “for I have betrayed an innocent man.” “What do we care?” they retorted. “That’s your problem.” Then Judas threw the silver coins down in the Temple and went out and hanged himself.”
Matthew 27:3-5 NLT
https://www.bible.com/116/mat.27.3-5.nlt
Worldly (I don’t really think this is a good example, but it was hard to find one):
“But there was a certain man named Ananias who, with his wife, Sapphira, sold some property. He brought part of the money to the apostles, claiming it was the full amount. With his wife’s consent, he kept the rest. Then Peter said, “Ananias, why have you let Satan fill your heart? You lied to the Holy Spirit, and you kept some of the money for yourself. The property was yours to sell or not sell, as you wished. And after selling it, the money was also yours to give away. How could you do a thing like this? You weren’t lying to us but to God!” As soon as Ananias heard these words, he fell to the floor and died. Everyone who heard about it was terrified. Then some young men got up, wrapped him in a sheet, and took him out and buried him. About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. Peter asked her, “Was this the price you and your husband received for your land?” “Yes,” she replied, “that was the price.” And Peter said, “How could the two of you even think of conspiring to test the Spirit of the Lord like this? The young men who buried your husband are just outside the door, and they will carry you out, too.” Instantly, she fell to the floor and died. When the young men came in and saw that she was dead, they carried her out and buried her beside her husband.”
Acts of the Apostles 5:1-10 NLT
https://www.bible.com/116/act.5.1-10.nlt
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control?
Hmm…I think you are “wracked” with remorse. It doesn’t cease in a min, hour, or day. It haunts you over and over again.
E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see?
Godly sorrow produces an earnestness to make things right, to be in the hands of God again, to do good. It produces a readiness to punish wrong.
Matthew 5:4 says that God will comfort those who mourn. I believe when we truly repent and are sorrowful for our sin God will comfort us.
A. Why, according to verses 8-9, does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused.
The people were grieved to repentance.
B. What, according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow?
repentance/death
C. Challenge question: Give an example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer. (And try to use different illustrations than your sisters have already used!)
When David’s child with Bathsheba was ill, David wept with sorrow and prayed for the child to live. No doubt he wept also over his sin and sought forgiveness and healing for the child. Everyone was amazed that after the child had died David could stop grieving. To David, the matter was finished. He had repented and the child had been taken to be with the Lord. The people were sorry for earthly reasons, but David understood the Lord.
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control?
Godly sorrow causes us to make a complete U-turn-we stop sinning and receive the joy and restored relationships. Damage control is like when my daughter says sorry without really meaning it-for the moment it’s okay , but the offense will happen again.
E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see?
We are eager to repent when experiencing godly sorrow, because we know it will bring comfort.
5. Share a time when true repentance led to comfort from the Lord.
This is such a joy to share. Just last night we had some sweet restoration between my husband and our 16 year old son. I believe I shared about their strained relationship and also about confronting my husband with his foolish behavior (from our study on the fool). God truly worked in an amazing way, as my husband was able to address some things with our son in a very calm manner leaning on scripture and his faith and even using his own faults as an example of what not to do. It was a very surreal moment that I will never forget. If I could share all the details, you would be truly amazed. Know this: a Christian can act like a fool, but will receive correction. And we who are involved in the life of someone behaving this way have a responsibility to prayerfully intervene. I’m convinced that so much could have been prevented in the way of damaged relationships and yet there is so much to gain from seeing one we love turn from their sin in true repentance. And yes, the comfort is so sweet 🙂
So glad to hear of some restoration taking place between your husband and son…God is good!
Chris — how wonderful!
6. Colin Smith says to think about a sin in your life and go through these steps:
A. How, if you had truly repented of this sin long ago and turned from it, might your life be different? More fruitful?
Well, unfortunately I am having trouble thinking of just one sin…they are all flooding my mind right about now 😩.
I suppose that when I was a young woman, I tried too hard to have a boyfriend; I was haughty. I should have just let the chips fall as they may. That wasn’t a time when God was in my life at all. Who knows where I would be now? Maybe single still and no children or grandkids to drive me crazy?! Maybe a beautiful dancer, dancing with the American Ballet Theater or something? That all doesn’t sound so bad to me right now! I would be FREE, lol. Oh well, back to reality…thanks for the quick mind vacation Dee! Or, maybe if I had let things be as they were I would have a different kind of relationship with my spouse; less difficult?
B. What kind of pain has this sin brought to yourself? To others?
I guess I wonder if my husband truly loves me (Fiddler on the Roof). Our marriage has always been hard; the children suffer.
C. How has it grieved God?
since I really wasn’t in touch with Him back then, He probably was sad about that. Also, that I wouldn’t trust in His choice for me.
7. What would a true U-Turn look like, and what measures might you take to strengthen the turn?
I don’t see that I can turn the past around now. I am not interested in divorcing my husband or anything like that. I am not haughty now. Not sure what to do now?
Laura — you are doing so much right. Since growth is organic, abiding in Him is key, and you are. I see you pursuing Him and that, hopefully, will bear fruit that will enhance your marriage. I pray for that. And for you to know how to love your husband despite wondering if he loves you. So hard!
Sunday:
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
The picture of the prodigal son and his father. Expressions of real mourning and a Father’s persevering love. That could be me and God.
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
Asking for forgiveness can just be lip service but mourning a sin is surgery of the heart.
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
Met up with my BFF after a year. Lots of prayers, quiet or deep conversations, and prayer walk, enjoying 2 meals together and going to church where we were very blessed! Am in a conference right now helping with New Teachers Institute for MO-will read comments and here and be blessed.
Sweet, Bing!
5. A time true repentance led to comfort from the Lord…. My boss had asked me about an incident and I said I didn’t remember it, which I didn’t at the time. But later on it came back to me, but I did nothing about it for months. Until God convicted me of lying, in essence. It was really hard to go back and confess (repent), but once I did I had a new freedom and even a bounce in my step.
6. Colin Smith asking us to think about a sin in my life.
a. If you had truly repented of this sin long ago and turned from it, might your life be different? More fruitful?
I know that I would have more energy and joy, so I presume I would also be more fruitful.
b. What kind of pain has this sin brought you? Others?
It is a deep pain, and discouragement, and sorrow over the consequences. For others, I can only answer from the viewpoint of watching others in their sin. There is a deep sadness, sorrow over what they are missing and how they have spread hurt around to innocent parties. Over time it becomes a – not expectation – but not a surprise, either. We’ll even say that…’I shouldn’t be surprised ‘, yet we hope for better.
c. How has it grieved God?
I know, or at least believe, theologically, that even one sin is enough for Christ to have to die for me. I generally choose not to think of that. It is too heavy for me.
7. A true u-turn looks like a radical change. It looks like the thought of going back to the sin causes a deep revulsion and refusal. I should force myself to think more of how God feels about it, and let that change me. Too often I think, like some famous queen that it is God’s business to forgive, and then I don’t let the seriousness of it sink in.
I sense you are talking about poor eating habits, for I identify with that and it worsens with my revolving door of summer guests. I pray for both of us that we will turn to God for satisfaction. This Momentum study is making me think!
9. What do we lose by persisting in an “enjoyable sin” according to Proverbs 1:22-33? Find everything you can.
We lose life with God. We choke on our own living. We are destroyed by ourselves.
10, What will godly wisdom save you from according to Proverbs 2:12-22?
It will save you from evil people and the immoral woman.
11. Idolatry is always involved, as you are choosing to meet your needs your way instead of God’s ways. How can you speak to your soul about how God can truly meet this need you are trying to meet through rebellion?
So, since I am no longer a harlot, I will address the sin of food. I am comforted by food, and I need to speak to my soul saying that God will comfort me instead of food.
6. Colin Smith says to think about a sin in your life and go through these steps:
A. How, if you had truly repented of this sin long ago and turned from it, might your life be different? More fruitful? I would be free from letting concerning thoughts linger too long, and my affections wouldn’t be misplaced but rather more and more on God overflowing to other people.
B. What kind of pain has this sin brought to yourself? To others?
It affects my body but also my soul becomes downcast. It affects others because I seem distant and not interested in what they are saying for I am too caught up in myself.
C. How has it grieved God?
This is hard! I am telling Him in my worry that being in this place is better than being with Him for my idols are better balms than Him. I am telling my fiercely loving and fiercely HOLY lover of my soul that being in the arms of another is better..ouch. That is awful! Ugh I hate my sin.
7. What would a true U-Turn look like, and what measures might you take to strengthen the turn?
I am taking that U-Turn now. It started with agreeing with God that this is an issue in my life and then trusting Him with it remembering He IS better, sooooo much better for His Joy is SO much deeper-longer lasting and better than an idol’s light comfort via food or something else which is followed by deeper pain.
I love the second half of this question because strengthening the turn is SO important. So the measures I am taking are to continue to spend time with Him in His Word in the mornings and meditating on scripture and when the red flag of worry appears, and believe me I know the symptoms, to remember the pain it causes vs. the experience of Joy of Him and turn immediately instead of letting it simmer and grow..so this is a daily and when I see it pouring out my affections on God via desiring Him more and that isn’t hard.
8. Look at the sins in Proverbs 6:16-19 and ask the Lord to show you if any are true in your life.
Am doing that now.
Read this from Rebecca please:
m taking that U-Turn now. It started with agreeing with God that this is an issue in my life and then trusting Him with it remembering He IS better, sooooo much better for His Joy is SO much deeper-longer lasting and better than an idol’s light comfort via food or something else which is followed by deeper pain.
I love the second half of this question because strengthening the turn is SO important. So the measures I am taking are to continue to spend time with Him in His Word in the mornings and meditating on scripture and when the red flag of worry appears, and believe me I know the symptoms, to remember the pain it causes vs. the experience of Joy of Him and turn immediately instead of letting it simmer and grow..so this is a daily and when I see it pouring out my affections on God via desiring Him more and that isn’t hard.
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Oh Rebecca, you are such an encouragement.
6. Colin Smith says to think about a sin in your life and go through these steps:
A. How, if you had truly repented of this sin long ago and turned from it, might your life be different? More fruitful? Im thinking of relationships in our family that could be healthy if I had been able to forgive. Perhaps I could have influenced these people for the kingdom but instead I made a poor example of a Christian.
B. What kind of pain has this sin brought to yourself? To others? The hurt of broken relationships has extended from myself to my children. They feel the same as I do towards my mother. I’m not sure if she would open her heart to the Lord, or be a different person, but I know my sin has had an impact on the whole family.
C. How has it grieved God? I’m sure the Lord is sad about this.
7. What would a true U-Turn look like, and what measures might you take to strengthen the turn? I have apologized to my mom for my unforgiveness. The years have caused much damage. The next step is to re-establish the relationship. It’s so hard. Praying for her should help. I find it easier to work on a relationship with my step-dad. Distance is a factor.
8. Look at the sins in Proverbs 6:16-19 and ask the Lord to show you if any are true in your life.
I need to think about this as related to today. I know in the past I knew my mom was hurt if we didn’t show up for family get togethers or if my step-mom took on a more prominent role in my life and I know in my heart I was glad she was hurt the way I hurt from the divorce. It wasn’t right.
So…today I call my mom to see how she is (we haven’t talked since May) and see if she wants to get together. I find out her schedule is pretty busy with doctor appointments and camping. Then she brings up my daughter’s wedding in October. I’m very hurt when she says how torn she is about whether to go on a special camping trip riding horses with her friends or come to my daughter’s wedding. She feels that since she hardly sees us maybe she won’t be missed anyway. I just want to cry inside. I feel just as rejected as when she divorced my dad. I also feel like it’s partially my fault because I’ve pushed her away for years by neglecting family get togethers in my hurt/anger over the divorce. I have apologized for this, but our relationship is far from repaired. I don’t know how to keep this from being a black cloud over my daughter’s wedding. Please pray I can handle this in a Christ-like way. My first response was definitely hurt and anger though I tried not to let it come through too much.
The Lord provided for a complete U-turn in my relationship with my mom. Part of making that happen when you aren’t sure how is just taking the next right step. After our talk this afternoon, I knew I needed to speak the truth to her about how I felt. We both were able to share and say hard things to each other that have needed to be said for years. After each sharing our side of hurt from the past and the results in our relationship today, I was able to talk to her about God’s sovereignty and the joy we can have in a relationship with Him and knowing we have an eternal future. She doesn’t understand it all, but seeds are planted. I’m okay if she goes riding instead of to the wedding. But I’m praying she can find joy in Christ one day when she can’t ride anymore.
I’ve been praying for years for this moment. Thank you, Lord.
What hard steps! Praying for ongoing reconciliation today, not only between you, your Mom and your children, but also between your Mom and the Lord!
Thank you, Lucy. Especially, between my mom and the Lord. I was able to speak to my daughter’s, step-mom and one of my sons at lunch today and share everything. Praising God that they are all believers and can see how prayer is so important for my mom and that restoration of our relationship with her will be a process and aided much by her own growth in faith. I can’t even explain how many times I’ve tried to have this conversation and it’s never been as fruitful and complete as this. Praise God.
Wow Chris! Such hard stuff. I can certainly see why you would be upset with your mom for not attending your daughter’s wedding! Can’t she go riding and hanging with friends anytime? This is a once in a life time event and of course she would be missed (by someone). How does your daughter feel about it? I’m glad you got to share with her and that you feel it was productive. I hope what is best for all happens. At least the door is open now. I know you have pain from the divorce, and she probably has pain that she caused you that pain, don’t you think? She may not admit that though. I will pray for you all.
Thank you for the prayers, Laura. Yes, my mom has so much pain. I asked her if she didn’t think she would ride horses in heaven. Lol. Seriously, though, she doesn’t have the eternal hope of a believer. She says she’s had many talks with God about, ‘Why her family?’ There was a car accident before the divorce where my dad received a closed head injury. He was lucky to survive. That created a situation she couldn’t handle. Who could without a church family and the Lord for support? She can’t forgive the drunk driver and can’t understand the Lord allowing it. At the time, I was 14 and I couldn’t understand all that went into her decision, and I couldn’t respect her when her boyfriend moved in almost right after my dad moved back home with his parents, without any discussion.
Riding horses has become her only joy in life. She gets depressed every winter because she can’t ride. She is 75 and very anxious about her ‘last’ ride. Apparently, when she can’t ride anymore she will lose her only joy in life. She has an MRI Tuesday, for a shoulder injury. She’s afraid surgery will be required and that this could be her last season to ride.
Of course, my daughter feels hurt. Her first reaction is to hurt back by not sending her an invitation. My children are believers, so they do understand how sad it is that my mom doesn’t have the eternal joy that we do. We will be praying for her to find that and trying not to act out in our flesh, but be controlled by the Spirit.
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
I guess I too have seen that phrase, “Blessed are those who mourn….” on sympathy cards expressing words of comfort. So it is helpful to have it explained here that Jesus is talking about mourning over our sin, and I am seeing how this is the “second step” after being poor in spirit. I also like the quote about God being a “shy lover” who backs away when He sees us in the arms of another.
2. What do you think is the difference between asking for forgiveness and mourning a sin?
I think I see the difference, but this raises some questions. Mary, in her post, asked, “How do I know when I’ve felt bad enough?” It seems to imply a condition on our being forgiven: that we must truly mourn a sin. How do we define that, or how do we know if we have truly mourned enough? 1 John 1:9 is oft quoted in church, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins…” I can see how this could become almost “rote”, like a check mark. I also think of the story Jesus told about the younger son, and his coming to his senses and his prepared speech to his father; it didn’t sound like he was truly mourning how he’d broken his father’s heart when he left, and all the years he was away, yet the father cuts him off in the middle of his speech and throws his arms around him. I sin every day in some way; sometimes I get angry and say (to myself) a cuss word; I know I need to say I am sorry to God about that, but boy, I am going to be an even more melancholy-type person than I already am if I am supposed to be mourning over every sin.
3. How have you spied God in your life in the last 24 hours?
Yesterday was rather emotional and sad; it was my last day at my current job (job was eliminated due to restructuring). It was just me and Beth in our little office at the hospital. Beth surprised me with a box on my desk and a really sweet card. There used to be a bakery called Crest Bakery in the area where my mom grew up; she worked there when she was 16. She loved their peach cups, and I grew up with them, too, and I always loved them too. I had brought some to work when we’d had a little party or something and had shared the stories with Beth….the bakery closed a few months ago and I was sad! Occasionally I would get peach cups for my mom when she was alive, and always on her birthday. Anyway, the original family who owned Crest has their own bakery, and when I opened that box – inside were peach cups! From Pallotta’s Bakery! My mom used to talk about the Pallotta family because she remembered them as the original owners of Crest. And these peach cups were just the same as they must have the original recipes. It was such a thoughtful thing for Beth to do. I was just feeling so down yesterday, thinking not only of the loss of the job I enjoy, but also the weekly interaction with Beth and my other coworkers. I know we’ll keep in touch and get together sometimes, but it’s not the same as seeing each other two or three days every week. Her thoughtfulness was so personal and so kind, and means so much to me as I can’t even talk to my own husband about how I feel because he acts like he doesn’t really care and he’s too busy with his own job to listen anyway.
Good question from Mary. I guess I feel that we should begin to see a change — and even though we fall, we continue to persist. But it is a good question.
Susan, I love how your sweet friend was able to celebrate your friendship and soothe your loss. I’ve experienced that sad feeling of not being able to share something like that with my husband as well. How nice that you have your friend AND you have Christ. I once learned from a friend that we must not expect anyone other than Christ to meet all our needs. It’s been a recent growth in me to trust and develop my relationship with the Lord in that way and not expect my husband to be everything. For a time I allowed hurt and unforgiveness to build up in our relationship over some of these expectations I had. I’m so glad to be free of that and be able to release my husband from what was unreasonable. We have just been through a time where he was neglecting our relationship, however, now that he is refocused I still need to leave room for him to be human. This year being our 30th anniversary, I’m amazed at how our relationship is still evolving and a challenge at times. Seems like we should have it all figured out, but the Lord still has lessons for us 🙂 Some of our toughest challenges have been in the last 5 years!
Thank you for this, Simmchris….my husband and I will also celebrate our 30th anniversary this year. It’s been a difficult road for us, too. And I HAVE allowed hurt and unforgiveness to build up. I know he cannot meet all of my needs, yet he is so often impatient, critical, and I am finding myself moving into that feeling of indifference towards him. We seem to live parallel lives. Thank you for pointing me to Christ.
Susan, I would also challenge you to call your husband out on his wrong behavior. Of course in a humble, Christ-like manner. I made the mistake of letting my husband’s behavior slide for too long. He also can be critical and impatient. In my husband, the root of this was selfishness. There’s no reason we can’t or shouldn’t hold our husbands accountable for their behavior and their part in our relationship as husband and wife. I asked my husband to find a person he could use as an accountability partner because he had isolated himself and was trusting in his own wisdom and not looking to the Lord in some areas. To my surprise, he did and his behavior has been so sweet. He has truly turned away from the sin he was living in 🙂 Praying for you.
We too are celebrating our 30th anniversary this year! It has been a very long, hard road. I like what you say about your husband not filling all your needs but how now you know God can and your husband can be set free from those.
Welcome Mara!
Hahaha! It’s me Dee….Laura – dancer. I think it autocorrected my entry; sorry you had to approve!
Susan I am sorry about the job loss. I know how changes in our lives affect us in the moment. I am praying for your new job, especially for it to be the right fit for you. That was so kind and thoughtful of Beth! My husbands family grew up with a local bakery (Dixie Lee) and it has changed hands over the years. His family will lament at times how the Lady fingers just aren’t what they used to be, and the strudel isn’t the same. My family didn’t really have that experience. Thinking of you today and wishing you well.
“Dixie Lee” and the lady fingers and strudel…yes, we like our pastries, don’t we?
Hugs to you, Susan. What a friend Beth is to you at this time of your job loss.
4. Meditate on 2 Corinthians 7:8-11
A. Why, according to verses 8-9, does Paul not regret the sorrow his letter caused?
Paul says he is happy because their sorrow led them to repentance.
B. What, according to verse 10, is the difference between godly and worldly sorrow?
Godly sorrow brings repentance which leads to salvation and dispels regret. Worldly sorrow brings death.
C. Challenge question: Give and example of both godly and worldly sorrow from the Scriptures and support your answer.
Godly: Psalm 51, in which David comes clean with God about his sin regarding Bathsheba and her husband Uriah. He appeals to God’s mercy and gives no excuses for his sin. Worldly: Psalm 32:3-4, which talks about when David kept silent about his sin and experienced mental, emotional, and physical anguish and suffering.
D. How is godly sorrow different than damage control?
I think damage control is wanting to get things back to normal as quickly as possible and to avoid painful consequences. In truth, I am only really thinking about myself when doing damage control, because I don’t want to feel pain. Godly sorrow is bringing God into the equation, coming clean, asking for forgiveness, yet understanding that all of the painful consequences may not be removed, ever. It’s understanding that my sin isn’t just against another person, but against God, too.
E. What kind of fruit, according to verse 11, does godly sorrow produce? Compare this to Matthew 5:4. What do you see?
The fruit of godly sorrow is earnestness, eagerness to be rid of sin, indignation, alarm, longing, concern, readiness for justice. Paul refers to some “matter” that the Corinthians were eager to prove themselves innocent. It sounds as if they didn’t want to continue in their ways, whatever they were doing, but wanted to have their names cleared of all wrongdoing. They cared; perhaps not only for their own reputations, but for the sake of the gospel. Matthew 5:4 says that those who mourn (or repent and go in the opposite direction, like the Corinthians) will be comforted. Maybe the being comforted means that you get a fresh start in your new direction. The opposite is when you let sin and the guilt and shame it produces overwhelm you and stop you in your tracks. Whatever the Corinthians were doing wrong, they could have just given up, said what’s the use, we can’t change, we’re losers and we’ll never amount to any use in God’s kingdom, and that would be that. Paul’s letter, while it made them feel hurt initially, lit a fire under them that made them want to change.
Love this from Susan:
Whatever the Corinthians were doing wrong, they could have just given up, said what’s the use, we can’t change, we’re losers and we’ll never amount to any use in God’s kingdom, and that would be that. Paul’s letter, while it made them feel hurt initially, lit a fire under them that made them want to change.
Susan, your comment about Godly sorrow is bringing God into the equation, coming clean, asking for forgiveness, yet understanding that all of the painful consequences may not be removed, ever…took me back to a time I was attending a forgiveness retreat and I was grappling with unforgiveness against someone who had caused great harm to a member of my family. I kept crying out to the Lord to make it as if that had never happened, and His response surprised me when He said “I can’t do that!” But then He whispered to my heart that He would redeem this event and bring much fruit from it if it was surrendered to Him, and that this redemption would be even better…what an encouragement that was to me while knowing that the painful consequences of that harm would still remain!
Tuesday
6. Colin Smith says to think about a sin in your life and go through the steps:
A. How, if you were truly repented of this sin long ago and turned from it, might your life be different? More fruitful?
I have a sin in my life from long ago that I waddled in too long and if I had known at the time how much I was breaking my dear Lord’s heart, I would of repented from it much sooner. I was more worried about having fun, not getting caught and hurting my parents, but at the time was unaware of how much it was hurting me and my relationship with the Lord. My life would be different in so many ways (won’t go into all the details) but one way, is all the time I missed out on in developing a relationship and drawing closer to the Lord that could of produced more fruit in my life. I have been very saddened by that and at times have had difficulty forgiving myself, but I know He has forgiven me!
B. What kind of pain has this and brought to yourself? To others?
I think I answered what kind of pain it brought to me in the above response. My father and I were very close and I know it brought him pain…as I knew it would.
C. How has it grieved God?
Greatly! When you read how grieved God was with the Israelites playing the harlot, it gives some perspective of how He grieves our sin!
7. What would a U-turn look like, and what measures might you take to strengthen the turn?
I think of being in a car and coming upon a flooded road. The wise thing to do is a u-turn. The measures I would take is making sure I stay close to the Lord, daily be in His Word and in prayer so I will have the wisdom to know danger/temptation is ahead and do a u-turn.
8. Look at the sins in Proverbs 6:16-19 and asked the Lord to show you if any are true in your life.
A lying tongue…how easy it is (for me) to exaggerate a story. 🙁
9. What do we lose by persisting in an “enjoyable sin” according to Proverbs 1:22-33? Find everything you can.
The gift of knowing God’s thoughts and His teachings, His wisdom. We will lack knowledge and when calamity befalls us, God will not rescue us.
10, What will godly wisdom save you from according to Proverbs 2:12-22?
It will save you from the ways of wicked men and from the seductive woman. The wicked will be torn from the land of God’s promise.
11. Idolatry is always involved, as you are choosing to meet your needs your way instead of God’s ways. How can you speak to your soul about how God can truly meet this need you are trying to meet through rebellion?
I have been holding back at work as far as doing my job with a servant’s heart. I need to do my job to the best of my ability regardless of whether I feel taken advantage of or not. I need to stop justifying my slacking by comparing it to someone else’s. Although I feel like I am enabling lazy people when I work harder than they do or I see people taking extended breaks without consequence, I need to trust God to handle the situations (control). Even if nothing ever happens to the lazier people I need to accept that and not think that I am better than them (pride).
12. Action Assignment: Ask someone you love and trust to tell you about a sin they see in your life. Report back. I asked my husband and he just kind of chuckled and said nothing. I know he is kindhearted and doesn’t like to rock the boat. I don’t have any close Christian friends so I guess I’m kind of stuck.
I laughed at your husband’s reaction!
9. What do we lose by persisting in an “enjoyable sin” according to Proverbs 1:22-33? Find everything you can. knowledge, his spirit, his words, comfort during terror or storms, His counsel/wisdom, security
10, What will godly wisdom save you from according to Proverbs 2:12-22? being ambushed, swallowed alive; evil, bloodshed, loss of life, being “simple”
11. Idolatry is always involved, as you are choosing to meet your needs your way instead of God’s ways. How can you speak to your soul about how God can truly meet this need you are trying to meet through rebellion? I could use these verses to remind myself of the damage resulting from “enjoyable sin.” More importantly, I can look to Him, respond to His love for me, His holiness. I can allow Him to saturate me.
8. Prov 6:16-19 are any of these true of me? I’d have to say that in thought if not in deed I’ve been guilty of all these. A sad commentary on someone who loves the Lord and has walked with Him for decades. But, I can also report that the frequency and severity of my offenses has lessened over the years.
9. What do we lose when we sin? God’s heart poured out to me. He would make His thoughts known to me. I would live in safety. I wouldn’t have fear of harm. I miss out on His advice. I lose the benefits of His rebuke. Calamity can overtake me. Distress and troubles can overwhelm me. God is not obligated to answer me when I call. He will not be found when searched for. I will experience the consequences of my sin. I will die and be destroyed.
10. Godly wisdom saves me from the ways of wicked men, from perverse words, walking in darkness, losing the light, no longer experiencing the delight of doing right, crooked paths, deviousness, adultery, ignoring the covenants made before God, from death, being cut off from the land, and being torn from my place.
11. Mary, this is such foolishness you are pursuing. God offers you so much! More than you can comprehend or hold onto. And you are willing, like Esau, to throw it away for food. Meditate on Him and His benefits. Think on His character and promises. Remember His word and the examples He gives. Throw yourself on Him.
12. I asked my husband and he said what he sees is selfishness. As I had been praying since Sunday about this week’s lesson, that is the answer God was giving me as well. I’ve learned here that I can’t root out selfishness on my own, but I can crowd it out with thoughts of God and of what He wants. So, please, Lord Jesus, help me do that starting right this moment.
Mary B. #12..You are on the right track!! Love how you are starting with HIM. 🙂
9. What do we lose by persisting in an “enjoyable sin” according to Proverbs 1:22-33? Find everything you can.
a. Ultimate loss: We lose God’s lifesaving buoy (His wisdom) via refusing to repent and listen which puts us in the wilderness and puts a huge rock in the stream of intimacy.
b. Disaster will strike and sweep over me like a whirlwind and calamity will overtake me like a storm.
c. Distress and trouble will overwhelm me
d, The consequences will be natural consequences based on my sin for it will come back and cut me to pieces. (eating the fruit of my ways).
10, What will godly wisdom save you from according to Proverbs 2:12-22?
a. The ways of wicked men and the perverse words of wicked men, and the adulterous woman. (their god is their belly for their affection is firmly placed in the things of this world.)
c. Being cut off as the wicked will be.
11. Idolatry is always involved, as you are choosing to meet your needs your way instead of God’s ways. How can you speak to your soul about how God can truly meet this need you are trying to meet through rebellion?
It helps me to tell myself the truth. For example: You are restless right now, who are you bowing down to? God says When your affections are disordered you become anxious and start delighting in other things to calm your heart. You have experienced how your idols cut you to pieces so turn now-repent and trust God. He fiercely loves it when you go to Him and confess and turn. Trust Him in the pain of turning like you have before-He is such a balm and will walk through it with me. When your affections are on God your restlessness ends and He is your peace. Remember what a delight it is to be in his arms. SO trust Him in the turning, delight in Him and in His Love, and wait.
Y9ur soul talk is such a good model.
I love this.
11. Idolatry is always involved, as you are choosing to meet your needs your way instead of God’s ways. How can you speak to your soul about how God can truly meet this need you are trying to meet through rebellion?
The Lord has been slowly working in my heart, clearing up some longstanding conflicts within my heart in what a godly response would look like in a current struggle I am in. My heart idols are those of the approval of men and being in control…and the circumstances which have come to bear down so forcefully right now have left those of no value…surprise! But, God has begun to reveal His response to this circumstance, He is not hovering over my loved one, wringing His hands in worry and attempting to control things. Rather, He is the shy lover (and I can be as well), withdrawing to a distance…allowing Himself to be pushed away…but never removing His love. When and if this person “comes to their senses” He will be there ready to offer His love and forgiveness. And oh my soul, I can do the same when I let go of my idols. Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear!
13. Listen to the above and share your notes and comments.
~ There is a form of Christianity today that boils down to agreeing with a certain set of beliefs ~ that lacks genuine repentance. It is a form of faith that leaves us decisively unchanged. We need to return to repenting as we believe and believing as we repent.
~ We need to rediscover the blessing of spiritual repentance and mourning over our sins.
~ Spiritual mourning is a heartfelt sorrow over particular sins arising from humility and infused with hope that leads you to forsake these sins at the cross.
Six points about spiritual mourning:
1. It relates to particular sins, always has a clear focus. It is mourning over a named sin. (You cannot address a general sense of failure and inadequacy. That is a dead end.) Name a sin clearly without excuse or evasion. Ask someone to name one sin you need to see. (I asked my daughter two days ago and am awaiting her reply. She is a perceptive young woman. )
2. Involves heartfelt sorrow over a particular sin and what it has cost. What it has cost me, what it has cost others and what it has cost Jesus.
3. Arises from humility. Go back to the first wrung in the ladder (poor in spirit). Deeply ingrained sinful habits require consistent return to being poor in spirit.
4. It is infused with hope. The holy spirit never leaves a person in despair. (And acknowledging sin, especially habitual, long history of a certain sin, can be overwhelming to the point of despair.)
5. Happens at the cross. The cross will strengthen my resolve to be done with this sin. (The cross is the only safe place to ultimately bare my sin and leave it.)
6. Will lead you to forsake sins. Alan Redpath said, “God is not willing to forgive one sin that you are not willing to forsake.”
~ Isaiah says, “The redeemer would come to comfort all who mourn. To bestow on them beauty instead of ashes. The oil of gladness instead of mourning. A garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”
~ God will wipe away every tear.
In further reflection of Colin Smith’s admonition to name specific sins, I find I lack the courage and sometimes cannot find the words to name and own that sin. That is where I have at times found that there can be great value in reading and amen-ing others’ prayers. The Valley of Vision – A collection of Puritan Prayers- has helped me, at times, to bring form to this nameless and general sense of failure and inadequacy and guilt.
This article by Andrew Peterson speaks to this:
https://rabbitroom.com/2017/11/every-moment-holy-new-liturgies-for-daily-life/
Small excerpt from the above article:
(referring to a book of prayers by Scottish theologian John Baillie, given to Andrew Peterson by friends)
….lead me gently but firmly into prayers I would not have otherwise thought to pray.
In them I am confronted by my own darkness – not just of obvious sins, but of the sins that lurk beneath them –
As well as the light of God’s great mercy, as the revenant of that Scottish saint takes me by the hand and leads me
through the thorny hedges of godly shame and repentance, into the wide golden fields of gratitude for God’s mercy in Christ.
Thanks so for the Peterson article!
13. Listen to the above and share your notes and comments.
Repentance is not just a cycle of sinning, admitting sin, asking forgiveness, and then saying “I’m sorry.” It needs to be a complete turning around of the behavior.
Spiritual mourning is 1) a sorrow over particular sins (named sins), 2) heartfelt sorrow (grows with understanding the cost; you are less than you could be without it) Jesus suffered for the sin you are mourning, 3) arises in humility (deeply ingrained. Go back to the beginning and step through the Beatitudes one at a time; poor in spirit. Use the momentum to remind yourself how to move forward), 4) infused with hope (no faith in your own failure. The Holy Spirit leads you to hope), 5) happens at the cross. (Gods demonstrates His love for us there), 6) leads you to forsake sin (you can’t continue to do the same sin over again. We need a serious intent to give the sin up).
When we mourn we are comforted.
13. Others have such good notes already, I’ll just share a few things I haven’t seen here.
He said that a faith that doesn’t change you is no faith at all. God’s people depart from sin.
Sinning affects others in that it robs them of who you could be.
Mourning leads to the cross and so strengthens the resolve to be done with that sin.
Allen Redpath’s quote – what I got from it is that it really isn’t repentance and mourning if in the background you’re telling yourself that you can go back to the sin. I don’t think our unconfessed sin – as believers- keeps us out of heaven, but it has all the other affects Colin talked about. We end up losing the most because of our sin. For unbelievers, those who don’t want God to tell them anything, I do think that keeps them out unless they change their minds and come in repentance to God. It isn’t so much that God keeps them out as that they never wanted to be in with Him.
14. When Colin said that the Holy Spirit always leads us to mourn but not to despair, God assured me that I don’t have to beat myself up over sin. I need to see it as He does, and hate the sin without hating myself. Then I can mourn as He intends, turn away from the sin, and live for Him.
15. My take away, one day early. I’m discovering that my selfishness works hand in hand with my lack of discipline with food. I’m learning to look at all of this differently. And I’m excited for where God is going to bring me as a result.
That is exciting, Mary. I am not sure exactly what caused my breakthrough with food, but that is what is needed, I know. It’s all about the heart.
Wow, Mary. This is ALL so good. Especially, the part about my sin robbing others of who I could have been. I wish I could have been forgiving towards my mother sooner. It’s really something how we learn from parental behavior. Not to excuse myself, but I must battle this learned behavior. I need to mourn this sin with a resolve to be done with it. I need to be a changed person. I’ve asked my kids to help me show a forgiving attitude towards my mom and apologized to them for setting a bad example all these years. I do still trust in God’s sovereignty and look for His purpose in the timing of this.