Last week we looked at how just as God ordained purity and passion for marriage, He also longs for a pure and passionate bride. This week we will consider how God ordained male and female for marriage and also covenant for marriage — and how these both also apply to our relationship with Him. (This first point is challenging, and I’d love comments to help me make it better, clearer, and stronger.)
WHAT CAUSED ADAM TO BREAK OUT
INTO SONG UPON SEEING EVE?

FINALLY, HERE WAS SOMEONE LIKE HIM.
BONE OF HIS BONE
FLESH OF HIS FLESH,
AND YET,
SO OTHER.
IN THE SAME WAY, WE ARE LIKE HIM.
AND YET, SO NOT LIKE HIM
THE SONG PUTS THIS POETICALLY.
HE IS LIKE AN APPLE TREE IN THE GARDEN THAT
PROVIDES SUSTENANCE AND SHELTER.
INDEED, HE IS THE TREE OF LIFE.
SHE IS LIKE A FLOWER THAT BRINGS
BEAUTY AND FRAGRANCE TO THE GARDEN
THIS IS, IN PART, THE MYSTERY OF MARRIAGE
THAT POINTS TO SOMETHING FAR MORE WONDERFUL.
Sunday:
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
Monday-Thursday Bible Study:
POINT ONE: Similarity yet Otherness

In The Mystery of Marriage, Mike Mason writes of this “mysterious, compelling combination of similarity and otherness:”
…Marriage is living with glory… It is living with a mystery that is fully visible, with a flesh-and-blood person who can be touched and held, questioned and probed and examined and even made love to, to our heart’s content, but who nevertheless proves to be utterly and impenetrably mysterious, infinitely contemplable.
As for me, I still haven’t gotten used to seeing my own wife naked. It’s almost as if her body is shining with a bright light, too bright to look at for very long. I cannot take my eyes off her – and yet I must. Too gaze too long or too curiously is, even with her, a breach of propriety, almost a crime. It is not like watching a flower or creeping up to spy on an animal in the wild. No, my wife’s body is brighter and more fascinating than a flower, shier than any animal, and more breathtaking than a thousand sunsets.
2. Mike Mason draws upon images from nature to describe his wife’s body, just as Solomon does. Take, for example, Song of Songs 4:5 and see imagine what he might be saying, though ever so discreetly.
3. Find a passage in The Song where the lovers are describing one another, and you can see them exalting in the difference between them.
4. Why do you think God ordained man and woman rather than two of the same gender for marriage? (Express this tactfully and winsomely as you might if dialoguing with someone who endorses same sex marriage.)
A strong argument can be made for the value of a child having both a mother and a father, for they bring different strengths to that child’s life. But what if there is an even deeper reason for God ordaining one man and one woman for marriage? What if it is a picture of His relationship with us? Comments?
5. Challenge question: What are some of the ways we, unlike the animals, are like God?
6. What are some of the ways that God is not like you — for which you are so thankful?
Last week a point Deanna made about how couples grow more and more like each other as they grow closer made me think of how the same is true of us as we behold Him, surrender to HIm, trust Him, and abide in Him. I’m in the prisons this week — seeing COMPLETELY transformed women. They are spending hours and hours each day with Jesus, and oh, what a difference it makes. (More next week!)
The Song sings of the bridegroom who is “the fairest of ten thousand,” mighty in strength, and fragrant with “myrrh,” the aroma of sacrifice. This is no ordinary bridegroom. This is our True Husband who can satisfy us in a way that no earthly husband, no matter how wonderful he might be, can. Marriage is a gift, but a transitory one, meant to point us to our True Husband.
He is like us, yet so mysteriously Other that we cannot help but wonder how, indeed, One so glorious could love us, could see us as we really are, could see us “naked,” and yet love us to the sky. Each of us has times when we wonder if it is really true that He, despite our constant failing, will always love us. To assuage our fears, He has made a covenant with us.
POINT 2: COVENANT
Recently in a discussion about sex in an evangelistic Bible study I facilitate, I was challenged: “Where in the Bible does it say there has to be a wedding? My partner and I have privately made promises to each other – we don’t need a piece of paper telling us we did.”
7. How would you answer this? Can you find an illustration in The Song of a wedding with witnesses?
8. What do you learn about how God views marriage covenants from Malachi 2:14?
The earthly covenant, sacred before God, points to a deeper covenant. God has made a covenant with His children, promising to love us for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, and in sickness and in health. Even when we fail Him, He will be true. He longs for us to love Him the same way, no matter how our circumstances fluctuate, but even when we do not, He will be true. We will flounder, and He knows that, but if we are truly His, no one can pluck us out of His hand.
When Martin Luther was endeavoring to recapture the gospel for his peers who had gone back to trying to earn favor with God, he took the verse “I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine” and talked about what happens in a wedding ceremony. Everything that belongs to the bride now belongs to the groom—and everything that belongs to the groom now belongs to the bride.
9. Challenge Question: So what do we, as the bride of Christ, give our Bridegroom? And what does He give us?
10. How sure is God’s covenant with us? Support with Scripture if you can?
11. Challenge Question: Hosea prophesied a change would one day come to God’s people in Hosea 2:19-23. Describe this and then, see if you can see this pictured in Song of Songs 6:3?
12. Last week one of you talked about the importance of how learning to trust your husband in the marriage bed was key to experiencing what God intended. In the same way, as we learn to trust God, we find a deeper surrender. Are you experiencing this?
Friday: Sermon
You will have two weeks again — but you may want to get started! If so, share comments.
James Hamilton Song of Songs 2
Saturday
13. What is your take-a-way and why?
127 comments
10. How sure is God’s covenant with us? Support with Scripture if you can
I searched several places or the word covenant, and found many. I’m not sure if the question is asking specifically for a wedding covenant, or not? I thought this was enlightening though…..I read a passage from Psalm 105:
“He remembers his covenant forever, the word that he commanded, for a thousand generations, the covenant that he made with Abraham, his sworn promise to Isaac, which he confirmed to Jacob as a statute, to Israel as an everlasting covenant, saying, “To you I will give the land of Canaan as your portion for an inheritance.” When they were few in number, of little account, and sojourners in it, wandering from nation to nation, from one kingdom to another people, he allowed no one to oppress them; he rebuked kings on their account, saying, “Touch not my anointed ones, do my prophets no harm!””
Psalm 105:8-15 ESV
And then ran across this one in 1 Chronicles:
“Remember his covenant forever, the word that he commanded, for a thousand generations, the covenant that he made with Abraham, his sworn promise to Isaac, which he confirmed to Jacob as a statute, to Israel as an everlasting covenant, saying, “To you I will give the land of Canaan, as your portion for an inheritance.” When you were few in number, of little account, and sojourners in it, wandering from nation to nation, from one kingdom to another people, he allowed no one to oppress them; he rebuked kings on their account, saying, “Touch not my anointed ones, do my prophets no harm!””
1 Chronicles 16:15-22 ESV
Nearly the same words! He loves us (the offspring) forever. We are His; it is sure.
11. Challenge Question: Hosea prophesied a change would one day come to God’s people in Hosea 2:19-23. Describe this and then, see if you can see this pictured in Song of Songs 6:3?
He describes being betrothed by God; in righteousness, love, justice, mercy, and faithfulness. He describes truly knowing the Lord, where heaven and earth will be as one; intertwined. In SOS 6:3, it describes the lovers as one also.
12. Last week one of you talked about the importance of how learning to trust your husband in the marriage bed was key to experiencing what God intended. In the same way, as we learn to trust God, we find a deeper surrender. Are you experiencing this?
Absolutely!! I no longer worry about too many things (I sometimes do slip and have to remind myself that He knows all and will take care of me). A recent example is a course that has been “re-assigned” to another teacher; one that I have worked really hard to develop for 13 years and enjoy teaching. I don’t understand why I am being taken out. It doesn’t seem fair, when I even decided to I pledge my masters degree to be able to teach it as a high school/college level (dual credit) course. The other instructor isn’t even earth/space certified as I am. It really hurts. I have decided to let God lead me in how I respond to this crisis in my work life. I wonder what interesting, new thing He may have in store for me? Will I be vindicated? I am curious to find out and will wait for His guidance.
not “pledge!” Stupid auto-correct!! It should say “…when I decided to complete my masters degree.”
Notes on sermon:
I do not have summary notes but did want to encourage those that have a hard time with poetry to listen. He does a very good job at explaining verse by verse what the symbolism means and how it fits in the whole picture of the Song.
2 things of interest stood out to me: The raisin cakes and apples spoken of in chapter 2:5 the raisin cakes were a known aphrodisiac in that time (often used improperly in pagan temples) and the apples are curious because she just described him as an apple tree.
Second – 2:4 – let his banner over me be love- we talked this week of the need for a public wedding. The banner is a public declaration to others.
Thought those were interesting. There were many other dots connected. The whole thing was good and I appreciate how he splices out translation and poetry to come to a conclusion about the story being told. I will listen again!
Jill — thanks for the encouragement to others to listen!
4. Why do you think God ordained man and woman rather than two of the same gender for marriage? (Express this tactfully and winsomely as you might if dialoguing with someone who endorses same sex marriage.)
I have been thinking about this quite a bit. I believe God designed man and woman to specifically fit together. He created Adam first, knowing that he was incomplete without Eve and once He determined “it was not good for man to be alone” He created Eve. He created their anatomy and persons to form a single unit for the purpose of loving each other and loving God.
I have been following quietly, as some of you know, I am in a quieter season–but He is carrying me and surrounding me with such love, from so many of you and I am thankful. So forgive this for being hard to understand and foggy! I honestly love this study so much that there is a tension in me of how to possibly describe with any degree of adequacy what I feel inside. I especially feel this in looking at #9, but wanted to try because it so touches my heart~
9. Challenge Question: So what do we, as the bride of Christ, give our Bridegroom? And what does He give us?
I enter in, I begin to walk the aisle, and I am broken, messy, like a vase that was shattered into pieces and then suffered many feeble attempts to be glued back together, wearing the marks of a botched job at self-healing. But I come, because where else can I go now? And because I know that I am welcome,– I have finally looked away from my self, I have lifted my head just enough, to see His face, His eyes upon me. There is no judgement. There is no condemning glare. There is light and love and –OH, there is a smile, of joy, of wanting me there, in His arms. And so I come, dirty, raw–and I know He sees Beauty, because I feel it. I am seen by Him. And He removes from my head this crown of thorns my sin has more than earned me, and He places instead, His crown. The Crown of righteousness, the Crown that calls me a Child of God. The Crown that gives me entrance in, forever. And on His own head, He wears not only my deserved crown of thorns, but that of all the world. He chooses it. He does it with love, in love, as He welcomes me. He chooses the Cross, for me, and with that Blood, He washes me, and then wraps me in His royal robe, and I AM HIS BRIDE.
Lizzy, this is so absolutely lovely and I am grateful for your answer- wish I could just copy it down(though I don’t know how!)
Thanks so much !
Lizzy – “But I come, because where else can I go now?” Amen. One of the themes of my life now! 🙂 What an exquisite post. Makes my heart sing!
Oh yes, Lizzy! Where else can we go?
10. How sure is God’s covenant with us? Support with Scripture if you can?
We have been reading Piper’s “A Momentary Marriage”. I think it is one of my favorites on marriage. These few quotes I think are relevant here:
“Christ will never leave his wife. Ever. There may be times of painful distance and tragic backsliding on our part. But Christ keeps his covenant forever.. He never forsakes her. He never abandons her. He never abuses her. He always loves her. He always takes her back when she wanders. He always is patient with her. He always cares for her and provides for her and protects her and, wonder of wonders, delights in her”
Some Scriptures on the assurance of God’s covenant that come to mind:
Hebrews 9:15 Therefore He is the mediator of a new covenant, so that those who are called may receive the promised eternal inheritance, since a death has occurred that redeems them from the transgressions committed under the first covenant.
Romans 8:32-39 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Lizzy, thank you for this life-giving Piper quote: “Christ will never leave his wife. Ever. There may be times of painful distance and tragic backsliding on our part. But Christ keeps his covenant forever.. He never forsakes her. He never abandons her. He never abuses her. He always loves her. He always takes her back when she wanders. He always is patient with her. He always cares for her and provides for her and protects her and, wonder of wonders, delights in her”