IF DAVID, A MAN AFTER GOD’S HEART,
COULD DECEIVE HIMSELF INTO ADULTERY AND MURDER,
THEN WE MUST NOT MINIMIZE THE DECEITFULNESS OF SIN.
THE ENEMY IS CLEVER AND DECEIVES THE BEST.
ANY ONE OF US IS CAPABLE OF BEING DECEIVED AND JUSTIFYING ANYTHING.
WHAT CAN PENETRATE THE DARKNESS OF OUR HEARTS?
NATHAN USED A STORY, A PICTURE, A PARABLE.
INSTEAD OF SIMPLY CONFRONTING DAVID WITH HIS SIN,
HE TOLD HIM A STORY ABOUT A POOR MAN WHO LOVED HIS ONE EWE LAMB.
NOT ONLY CAN WE LEARN FROM THIS HOW TO CONFRONT OTHERS,
BUT WE CAN GLEAN HOW TO USE THE PICTURES OF PROVERBS AND PARABLES
TO PENETRATE OUR OWN HEARTS,
BRINGING LIGHT TO OUR DARKNESS.
THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME WHEN I HEARD A SERMON ON
MARTHA THE MANIPULATER
IT WAS EASIER FOR ME TO SEE MARTHA’S IDOL OF CONTROL THAN MY OWN
BUT THEN I REALIZED, GOD WAS SAYING: THOU ART THE WOMAN!
GOD HAS CHANGED ME, A WOMAN IN THE LAST ACT OF HER LIFE,
AND HE DID IT THROUGH A STORY.
If you read Idol Lies, you know how He changed my relationship with my administrative assistants, and even with my children. In June my daughter Beth, her family, and her extended in-laws family came to my cottage for ten days. Beth is the daughter we adopted from Thailand, and had had such deprivation in her first twelve years, that she had much to overcome. What she had never had and needed so badly, was grace. Steve gave it to her, and I tried, but so often I failed. This vacation was different — she felt grace from me, and began to relax. As she began to relax, the whole atmosphere changed for both of us. (How sad that in the past she has not felt truly relaxed around me, her mother!) Perhaps my favorite day was near the end of the vacation when I took her to play pickleball with me at the Y while her in-laws watched the children. Though she just has one arm, had never played, and often fears criticism from me, she plunged in with all her heart. She was amazing on the court, spinning and driving that ball so that her opponents had trouble returning it. Everyone watching was cheering her on and asking, “Who is this one-armed girl?” Oh — what grace can unleash. I wish I had changed sooner, but I’m so thankful for the story of Martha that had the power to put light into the darkness of my heart.
LIKEWISE, IN THE BOOK, THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE:
The authors open with a true story of a man who was being unfaithful to his family and had decided to leave them to be with another woman. He’d taken fire in his bosom, like David, and was blind. No pleading, no arguments, and no tears could stop him. He had made up his mind.
But one day his daughter told him about a dream she had had. She, her mother, and her siblings had been hit broadside by a careless driver, and their injuries were catastrophic. She was lying on the road, bleeding, when she saw the man who hit them. She said, “It was you, Dad.”
Her word picture penetrated his heart. He repented, came home. He changed.
GOD USES PARABLES, IN PART, TO HELP US SEE WHAT OUR HEARTS ARE HIDING
FROM HIM, FROM OTHERS, AND FROM OURSELVES.
A STORY PENETRATES OUR DARKNESS WITH LIGHT.
This week we will look at the story of David and hear a great free Keller sermon, and then consider how to put the pictures of the proverbs we will study to work on our own hearts.
SUNDAY ICEBREAKER:
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
MONDAY — WEDNESDAY
Because the story of David and Bathsheba is so familiar, I’m going to come from a little different angle and also have you listen to Keller’s free sermon on it before we go onto the chapters in Proverbs that are filled with life-changing word pictures.
Though David had thousands of men in his armies, there were “thirty mighty men” who were close to him and did great deeds of valor for him. Uriah was among those mighty men.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11:15-19. How did they risk their lives for David?
Proverbs 6:27 paints this word picture:
Can a man carry fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burned?
Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched?
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom.
5. Apply the above word picture to your own heart. Where are you trying to walk on hot coals because you are so reluctant to let go of an idol? Identify the lie.
Listen to the following free sermon on David and Bathsheba.
David and Bathsheba – Timothy J. Keller
6. What comments or notes do you have concerning the above sermon?
Thursday-Friday: Proverbs Filled With Pictures
Last fall when we were studying marriage, we did look at some of the pictures in Proverbs concerning sexual intimacy — so as a review for those who were with us, and new material for our new sisters, please read the opening to that blog by clicking here and then sharing how one of the pictures penetrates your heart and why:
Sexual Intimacy as It Was Meant To Be
7. What picture penetrates your heart and why?
8. Read Proverbs 5 and find a picture that is meaningful to you and explain why.
9. Do the same with Proverbs 6.
10. And the same with Proverbs 7.
Saturday
11. What is your take-a-way and why?
151 comments
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
The Fruit in your life Dee since God awoke you through the story of Martha! Your flowers are in bloom-Your fragrance is beautiful. My heart melted to read of how your fragrance is blowing in your children’s lives and in Beths even more now. How they must be so encouraged in Him knowing only He can melt hearts and change them. I found myself, after reading your story, asking God to awaken me anew for I know there are dark places in my heart He hasn’t brought to the surface yet. I hope this study is going to be one you will get published. 🙂
Rebecca, I agree strongly with everything you said here!
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
“she plunged in with all her heart”. I felt the tears spring up when I read that phrase–picturing Beth–courageously, over-coming fear, because she was bathed in grace. There is much there for me–both in experiencing His grace for me (I too recently read Extravagant Grace by Duguid and am still processing!) But there is also much here for me as a parent, a wife, sister, daughter–the POWER of grace to heal. “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.” 1 John 4:18
Lizzy — I am reading that again too and still processing. It is so weighty. I think it is true that maturity is probably more related to dependence and intimacy than anything. What I am “processing,” and may not understand, is that sometimes she seems to say mature Christians don’t have more fruit or victory over sin, and sometimes she seems to say the other. But, I am still processing too. We can process together! I see Dawn MS is reading and processing too!
Rebecca, you are always my cheerleader. Yet I am seeing so much in me that is not lovely, yet it presses me into Him.
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
That we are capable of being deceived and justifying anything. It’s a slippery slope, it doesn’t happen all at once. We’re usually not aware that we are going down that road until we (hopefully) are made aware of it and turn back or until we hit rock bottom and wonder how we got there!
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
In Corrie ten Boom’s book The Hiding Place she tells about how after a speaking engagement she met a former Nazi guard who had savagely beaten her ill sister and he was tearfully telling her how thankful he was that she and God were so forgiving. She realized at that moment that she hadn’t forgiven him and didn’t want to forgive him. It was quite a long struggle for her before she was able to truly forgive him.
When my niece (who was like my daughter) was killed, my boss at first told me that I could take the rest of the week off and then had a supervisor call me after 2 days and tell me that I had to return to work the next day. Long story short it turned out to be 3 people in my dept. (people I had known for 10-20 years) who complained about how I was granted this last minute “vacation” time when they had been turned down in the past. I decided that I was never going to talk to these people again except when I absolutely had to for work purposes. It took me a year before I could finally talk to them without thinking of this incident, but Corrie’s story helped me put it in prospective. At least they weren’t the cause of my niece’s death. Just writing about it makes me wonder if I’ve truly forgiven them though, it’s making me kind of angry and I have to go back to work tomorrow:)
Dawn — great example from Corrie ten Boom.
Our little church went through a great study on forgiveness and it really helped me release hurt I’d had toward someone, to forgive from my heart and let it go. I realized afterward a bitter root was growing. I’d love to send it to you if you are interested. Write to me in comments@deebrestin.com if you are interested. The fact that you see these people all the time makes it so important not just for them but for you. I’m not saying that wasn’t a deep hurt, for it was.
Dee, I would be interested in the study on forgiveness that you offered to Dawn as well. Forgiveness is an issue we have to deal with both as a family and within our church. Can you email it to me?
Diane–I asked for it too and it looks so good–I’ll send it on to you:)
Thanks, Lizzy. I got your email with the attachment.
Dee, I would like to have access to the study on forgiveness, too. I am not sure I am processing forgiveness really well. I have a tendency to force myself to forget about the hurts thinking God will take care of it for me.
Dee, maybe we need to do this study on forgiveness here?! I’m going to ask Elizabeth to email it to me, too…I struggle to just “let it go”, too.
Ditto on all these posts about doing the forgiveness study!
Dawn–I always so appreciate the honesty of your posts. Forgiveness is such a hard area for me, so I can imagine how difficult, especially to be in their constant presence! You reminded me of what our pastor shared this morning– I don’t know if you all have heard about the shootings in Charleston, but, being in SC, it’s all over the place–so (in full tears)–my pastor talked of how the victims’ families (Christians) have publicly offered forgiveness to the murderer, and that some have criticized & said they probably will feel the hatred and anger later…but our pastor said that one of the hardest parts of forgiveness is that we have to continue to do it, over and over,–sometimes for the same person, the same offense–“70 x 7”. I see that here in you–you have forgiven, but because of the work setting, you are forced to re-visit the pain, re-forgive, over and over. That is HARD. I am humbled by your example and will pray for you in this.
Thanks for that Lizzy. I will keep forgiving and not looking at it as a one time thing.
Dawn, my thoughts as I read your post above were similar to what Elizabeth expressed here. When you said, “just writing about it makes me wonder if I’ve truly forgiven them though, it’s making me kind of angry…” I could so relate to this! Just recently I had a situation where I was hurt at being left out of something and I was feeling hurt, angry, and resentful. I confessed it to God, and even as I was telling Him about it, I could feel those emotions being stirred up again. They can still come back when I revisit the hurt in my mind, so I agree that there are times when forgiveness is not a once and done thing, but a conscious decision again and again. The thing I struggle with the most is re-playing the offense over and over in my mind, and that, too, is where the enemy, I believe, does his dirty work – in our minds, he attacks us. That, too, is a decision I need to make – to stop the re-play tape in my mind and take that thought captive to Jesus.
Lizzy (I just realized under your picture it’s “Lizzy” and not “Elizabeth”:)) if you are able, I would like for you to email me the study on forgiveness that you emailed to Diane!
I couldn’t reply under Susan’s post, but I wanted to say that I, too, have had an incident recently where I felt like I was disrespected by my boss and a colleague. I, too, keep trying to not replay the event over and over AND I will have to go through a full semester next year knowing that I felt this way this year and will potentially feel the same way next year. Thank you for the forgiving 70×7 quote. That really puts it into perspective for me.
What excellent advice and how very true…”re-forgive, over and over.” How often I leave it at the cross, but then go back and pick it up again…re-forgive, over, and over, and over….as many times as it takes. Lizzy, (feels a bit odd 🙂 ), can you forward me the forgiveness study too?
Dawn, I am truly sorry for the way your co-workers treated you in your grief…sad, very sad…
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
I can’t imagine you, Dee, not giving grace to others, but I have definitely “been there and done that.” It’s hard to not be the “judge” for me; to make sure others get what they deserve for their actions. So sad of me and I am trying to change. It is really hard when it comes to my children. As you know Dee, we are struggling with a hard road with our daughter, and now it’s my youngest, who has been manipulated by our evil, secular world. I am having to remember that God wants me to just LOVE them and let Him take care of the rest, and that is difficult. I have faith in Him when just a few years ago I relied on myself to solve all the challenges our family was going through. WHAT A RELIEF TO GIVE IT TO GOD!!!! I no longer worry, or am afraid, because He holds the keys. “My hope is in you, Lord, all the day long….” Aaron Shust
Laura, thank you for your post. I am going through a similar struggle with our only child and daughter. Yes, forgive and forgive and forgive. That is what I need to do.
Oh, Laura, many tough things on “your plate”…thank you for your witness of trust, giving it to God and leaving it with Him. May God’s will be done..and stomp on the snake! 🙂
Laura — what a beautiful testimony, and yes — it takes a lot of work to rule the world! 🙂
1. The daughter’s dream. I feel exactly the same way.
2. The real life stories in Idol Lies. I pray for the kind of victory those ladies have had….still in the trenches, struggling to believe what I know.
Hmmm. The daughter’s dream. You have experienced this kind of pain.
I have not yet completed this weeks lesson, however, reading through the comments so far what is standing out to me already (perhaps still from last week’s look at the prodigal son story) is that “I am the Man”. As I mulled over Tim Keller’s prodigal sermon clip last week it hit me, I was very convicted, that I am becoming the older brother. Early in my walk (almost 30 years ago) I was truly the prodigal son, having wasted my youth on what I thought was “the good life” of partying, doing my own thing. Somewhere over the past ten years, and I’m not sure when this subtle change happened, I realized what a critical, harsh, judgmental spirit I have developed. I often have an attitude that I know the answers, that if only “they” would do what they should things would be OK. I have been repenting of this and asking God to give me a heart of flesh in place of this heart of stone that has developed. I don’t want to be “the man”…. I want to always remember the undeserved grace extended to me by my Lord and Savior, and likewise extend that to others. It is hard when God deals with you, when you see yourself without blinders, and yet I am so thankful that God is dealing with me. I am thankful too, for this study. What a blessing it has been already and I’m only two weeks in !
I surely see a tender heart now!
Beth Ann, this is a golden post, and thank you for your honesty, “Somewhere over the past ten years, and I’m not sure when this subtle change happened, I realized what a critical, harsh, judgmental spirit I have developed. I often have an attitude that I know the answers, that if only “they” would do what they should things would be OK.” I, too, have been given rude awakenings to see my own sin, and you are so right that the slide downward is often so subtle that we don’t notice it.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
In Luke 9, Jesus asks “Who do you say I am?”. My answer to Jesus’ identity, defines my own as well. To the degree that I see and know Him as Savior, I recognize myself as His sinful yet forgiven, broken yet beloved, daughter. Thinking on that lately has helped me see (again) how I spend so much time and effort defining myself as a good wife, mother, friend–working for my identity, apart from Him. I had thought that since I was no longer trying to perfect my family, they were not an idol. Yet I see that in my obsessing, worrying, constant circulation of parenting books beside my bed…I am still running on the treadmill of “try harder, try this now, more of this…”
Rest. Release. Trust. Breathe. These are words He is speaking to me now. I am His and nothing compares. Even if I “get” all the good things I seek so earnestly–better health, better relationships…I will still ache, I will still feel the holes that drain the fulfillment from my life. To seek after Him, His Word, with that passion that I have sought all these “good but lessor” things–that is where I want to be. I was telling a friend about our Mary today. She doesn’t have a husband or kids, the things I work so hard at–but she has Him, and He seems to FILL her. I want that. That peace, that rest, that filling up–so the other things are just whipped cream, but He is IT. Sorry–got a little past “brief” and I don’t even think I made sense–He understands me! ;0
Lizzy, I “get” your post…you did make sense! I love this, “Rest. Release. Trust. Breathe.” And this, “Even if I “get” all the good things I seek so earnestly…I will still ache, I will still feel the holes that drain the fulfillment from my life.” I think that’s what moved me so when I watched Ragamuffin, about Rich Mullins. He always seemed to have that ache and it was sad, yet I recognized the ache in myself, too. And I agree about Mary, that He seems to FILL her…I want that, too.
susan–you have always been so good at “getting me” 🙂 Ragamuffin had a big impact on me as well–such a reminder that the struggle here is real and life-long…but our true Home awaits! Just emailed you the forgiveness study from Dee. (and yes, after 4+ years here, I decided to give up my “cover” as elizabeth! Actually it was by accident at first, but I’m too old to remember to swicth back & forth…and my whole “in person” world calls me lizzy, so I decided to be brave 😉
Hmmm…I wondered why people were calling you that these days. I guess I missed something in my very busy last few months. Love “Lizzy!”
I get it too. But Lizzy, He definitely gets you! 🙂
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
I love the story of Dee and Beth. As a recovering controller and approval addict, I can see how it might be difficult for Beth to relax around Dee. It is wonderful that Beth relaxed and entered into the pickle ball game with enthusiasm, especially considering how difficult it is to play with one arm.
I also need to ponder anew how easy it is to be drawn into sin, like David was. We allow ourselves to be blinded and “walk on hot coals.” I sin and then wonder how I could be so weak. What lie am I believing?
1. What stood out to you from the above and why? Your story of you and Beth, the hope of change, the light flooding into the darkness, that things can change…that we can learn to be grace dispensers. I’ve been feeling so blue today. This opening brought a flood of tears. The Language of Love book I read years ago and it was huge for me. I am so grateful for how learning to use word pictures has helped me communicate, it is a sweet thing to see it as part of the lesson today.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
1 Corinthians 13 1-7
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
These verses brought me to the end of myself.
We had taken guardianship of two of Bills siblings and had Bill’s son from an affair come to live with our family. I had been so naive, thinking it would be simple and that these additions to the family would love and appreciate ME, we would all be happy together. But they had come out of homes where there was turmoil and dysfunction, and it was HARD.
I began to grow bitter and resentful.
I read 1 Corinthians and wept. I was trying so hard and utterly failing to love them.
I prayed, confessing my sin and inability. I felt such a peace melt over me as I surrendered all my lousy effort. I asked God to do a work of love in me. I was so convicted that I lacked real love, that all my doing was about me. I began to serve those kids as unto Christ instead of expecting them to honor me.
It has never turned into the fairytale I imagined, but there has been good, real, fruit. I still lack love, I long to be more truly broken, to have a more tender heart. But I know that I am in process. He will bring me to completion. I can rest in that… at least sometimes I can 🙂
Chris, what a story you have. Thank you for sharing.
Chris, this is such a powerful story, and oh, how I see in myself also that “all my doing was about me.” I love the turn here, “I began to serve those kids as unto Christ instead of expecting them to honor me.”
Chris — this is golden. Such raw real truth.
Chris,
Your raw sharing here today brings much hope and encouragement to me as I visit two of our children in Omaha. Thank you, Chris.
Hi Chris, I have not been on here in a long time. I have been silently following during this study, as life has been busy as usual…but I just wanted to say I really needed to hear this today. As I was trying to get into the study and spend time with God this morning, I kept having flashes of people in my mind that I hold grudges against. All the while as Im trying to focus on the study, I just kept seeing the grudges pop up and me thinking in my head, well so and so isn’t so nice….and Im not going to acknowledge them anymore, they do not appear to be who they claim to be in real light….etc….and I just kept thinking I’ll get around to pray for them, as that is what God tells us to do. Pray for those that offend us…and then it hit me….wow…its ME that needs prayer and to ask for forgiveness. These people have done nothing to me,yet I have found myself holding a grudge because these ‘offenders’ did not act or react the way I thought they should towards ME…God kept showing me had become ME…all about ME, MY feelings, MY self-righteousness, MY pride, MY ways, NOT HIS ways…..ouch….Thank you for this post. I knew something was going on when I had read an earlier post on ‘forgiveness’ and I kept feeling the Lord probe me saying that I Needed to really stop and read on forgiveness in my heart towards others. I have been really seeking and searching a lot this past week and God has been showing up….and this was the big….forgiving those that I have held grudges against….not even realizing and justifying in my heart and mind I was right, they were wrong. After all, I am a christian….how can I not be right….yikes! Pride cometh before the fall, thank God, He loves us enough to wake us up to our own sin in our hearts, if we will listen and seek him with all our heart. Something I thought I was doing, but I wasn’t. I was giving God all of me except those grudges, because I had justified my unforgiveness not even realizing it. God is really using scripture to show me too…thank you so much for this!
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
Thank you for this truth…
Staci, Thank you for this, sometimes after confessing my faults publicly like this I have a moment of …oh no…what have I done! Sort of like a dream where you are back in school and realize you are naked 😮
I am blessed to know you were convicted and I hope encouraged…I prayed for you when I read this 🙂
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
The picture of the green snake startled me and as I looked longer, I saw how deceiving looks can be. And because the snake was green, I think of how the enemy camouflages and blends in with the “scenery”. I can be easily duped with blending in also-the subtle works of the enemy. And he often goes for my “achilles heel’. I need to stay close to the Lord as “any of us is capable of being deceived and justifying anything”. I have been there, done that. And I thought I was doing this particular person a favor until somebody confronted me lovingly of the sin in my life.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
I read the book The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen and also the book Prodigal God by Tim Keller. I saw myself in the younger brother but more so in the older brother. All these many years, I have sought God’s approval through works and it has translated to my relationships. Dee, thank your for the transparent sharing of your relationship with Beth. I, too have not shown grace to my daughter, Ruth Ann. The enemy had me fooled by allowing me to think that I expected this and that from my daughter because I just wanted the best for her. Through providential circumstances (including finding this blog), I am learning to see the grace God has lavished on me and am wanting to desire deeply in my heart to extend that grace to others also especially to my own daughter. How I want my heart to experience what I know in my head! I thank God for all of you here on this blog.
Ernema–love your response in #2, I relate so well. love this “I am learning to see the grace God has lavished on me and am wanting to desire deeply in my heart to extend that grace to others”
Ernema — thank you. We fight the fight of letting go and giving grace together!
1. What stood out to you from the above and why?
When I first opened this week’s lesson, I saw what I thought was an unusual but pretty “green thing”…thought maybe it was some kind of tropical flower or plant…I was deceived! I had to look closely to see it was really a snake. But that is how the enemy often deceives me, by appearing as something good, or making something I want seem so right, so normal and okay to want that. ANYONE OF US IS CAPABLE OF BEING DECEIVED AND JUSTIFYING ANYTHING. So true, and I can’t blame it all on Satan. The Bible tells me that my OWN HEART is deceitful and exceedingly wicked, and I believe it, yet I am so often deceived into not seeing it! May my eyes be opened even more this week.
Dee, your story of you and Beth is very moving and thank you for your transparency (you do that a lot here, be transparent, and it makes you real, human, and encourages us to get honest with ourselves). I love how she relaxed as she felt grace. Isn’t that what God wants from us? To believe, really believe, that He loves us, forgives us, has lavishly poured out His grace on us, and to relax in His arms; and when He opens His arms, we can run and skip and feel free because we are relaxed in His grace and love. I know what it is to feel uptight around certain people; but sometimes it’s ME who is the problem because I am not giving THEM grace. Being the elder brother means I’m not relaxed and it transfers to others around me. It has to start with me being relaxed in His grace and then I give that grace to others and they relax. Reminds me, Dee, of what you’ve said that Steve often told you, about if there’s a problem in a horizontal relationship, there’s a problem in the vertical one, too.
susan: love this whole paragraph:
I love how she relaxed as she felt grace. Isn’t that what God wants from us? To believe, really believe, that He loves us, forgives us, has lavishly poured out His grace on us, and to relax in His arms; and when He opens His arms, we can run and skip and feel free because we are relaxed in His grace and love. I know what it is to feel uptight around certain people; but sometimes it’s ME who is the problem because I am not giving THEM grace. Being the elder brother means I’m not relaxed and it transfers to others around me. It has to start with me being relaxed in His grace and then I give that grace to others and they relax. Reminds me, Dee, of what you’ve said that Steve often told you, about if there’s a problem in a horizontal relationship, there’s a problem in the vertical one, too.
Susan, Yes..I love this paragraph too. SO true! The more we believe, really believe He loves us and has lavishly poured His Grace on us the more we enjoy the moment, the people we are with-just to be with them and enjoy them. The more we freely give His Love to them. The less self centered we are.
I woke up and realized yesterday how self centered I am! I tend to deeply desire time alone to contemplate. To think and to just be in awe of God in communion yet can I not be in awe of God also when i am around His body and when I am around others who may not know Him but made in His image? When I am in groups of people I tend to think on when it will be over so I can have time by myself or with a close friend or two. 🙁 BUT He has opened my eyes and is going to change me..Glory to Him.
Susan, this was my experience as well…looking at the kind of lovely “green thing” wondering what exactly it was and then realizing it was a snake…yuck! It brought “home” the ease in being deceived…how things at first glance can appear one way and the reality of the situation can be so different.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly. God used Hope’s story in Idol Lies by Dee Brestin to unveil my idolatrous heart and turn me to Him. God used the movie Camelot to depict His pursuing of me because He loves me not just because He “has to.” God used Ann Voskamp’s story to show me how my own fear paralyzes me in certain situations. Many others. Ever since God revealed to me my true heart (idolatrous but loved) I see a bit of me, Him, Gospel, in every story.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11:15-19. How did they risk their lives for David? They broke through enemy lines, risking their lives to get water from the well of Bethlehem. They risked their lives to give a gift to David, something he desired they must have loved David. I have never been able to decide how I feel about David’s response but this morning I can see perhaps he wasn’t allowing himself to become spoiled. To consider himself so above the lives of his warriors that he would drink water that put them at risk? He was not allowing himself to get all “high and mighty.” Maybe.
I’ve had the same feelings about that incident, Jill. But yes, I think you are right.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
I have struggled with this question for a couple of days now. I think I have figured out that Job’s faithfulness to God, even when he didn’t understand (he never knew “why?”) has made the most impact on me in my life. His story has made me understand that it’s not about me at all….it’s about Him, and showing others through me, who He is. So, my idol was me, now it is Him.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11:15-19. How did they risk their lives for David?
The mighty men went into the camp of the Philistines at Bethlehem to get their water for David.
1. What stood out to you?
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
Yes. On one hand, I have been touched many times by stories, testimonies, sermon illustrations and such, but on the other hand, I have been blown away, broken and crushed in such a way that lead to being healed and changed immensely by a story or two that have revealed a “darkness” I was hiding in my heart. A bit too personal to share here, sorry. But I get it! Thank God for his tender, careful, creative ways of reaching into our darkness and rescuing us from our self-imposed misery.
My experience has been that when a story hits home in such a way, it’s like Psalm 18:16-19:
He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me. They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the Lord was my support. He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.
Thank you for sharing that verse! I’m going to copy it down to think on today.
Jody, I love that passage in Psalm 18…such a powerful word picture of His rescue. I imagine being in the water, not even able to reach my arms up, and He took hold of me.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
For me, most recently. He started earlier with last week’s blog and then while I was reading Dee’s new manuscript for her new book.OH-it is penetrating my heart! So I have slown down. Then God came in during our pastor’s sermon yesterday in 1 Corinthians 16.
There are two stories in Dee’s book that have impacted me so far but I will pick one. The story about her dear friend who left her husband due to his pornography addiction-she couldn’t abandon herself to him but this time what struck me was how she was responding to her new godly husband-with wild abandonment. Being naked and unashamed-enjoying him fully and he her. This is how God wants me to respond to him with wild abandonment but I am holding back justifying why we can’t give more generously of our time and finances than we are-we are raising four teenage boys which can be costly, and take up most of our time. Yet the question I posed to myself was this, “Rebecca, why can’t you fully abandon yourself to him? Like Dee’s friend to her husband.” The answer was that my comfort idol makes me a hoarder of my time and finances. I want to hold on to the things that bring me security-comfort. Our comfort idols are deceptive!!
Then when my pastor said Jesus hung on a cross-the ultimate generous act-He gave Himself, everything He was so He could lavish me with His beauty-intervene in my mess and make me Royalty-His Princess wrapped in His royal robes. That melted me yesterday!! Then he read a story of a single mom that our church bought groceries for. She experienced God’s love. That was a light bulb moment for me! My heart broke and He brought me to my knees in repentance.
So when I got home, I went over our budget, my comfort idol was saying, “but what if?” God is saying, “My love I have your ‘what if’s'”. I just started at 10% just as a place to start-not legalistically for I DON’T want that to be my heart’s motive for it is all his anyway!!
I hope this isn’t scattered for was interrupted the whole morning by my boys and husband-which is pretty much true every morning. I am taking the boys and their friends to a water park for the day today..will catch up on some reading and have more time with Him!! :))))
I identify Rebecca with your angst, the tension between being prudent & being generous. Money has been an area of fear for me. There are ways that I do not submit and trust but want to control…I sometimes fear these things more than I fear God. We began to tithe years ago, when to my surprise Bill agreed to it. God has been so good to us, providing great deals on cars, preventing financial missteps, blessing Bill with favor in his job. I know it is all Him. I still have my narrow eyed moments, but I do see more quickly the enemy is pushing those thoughts.I want to encourage you, in your desire for trust, generosity and freedom in this area, I will pray for you, you can pray for me too if you feel led to.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11:15-19. How did they risk their lives for David? That story always makes me feel bad, like a child doing something they feel sure will please a parent only to find that they’ve offended them. It reminds me of Cal in East of Eden. I never loved reading it.
It is clear in scripture that the mighty men were devoted to David, sticking loyal with him though thick and thin.
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom.
He didn’t go out to battle
he arose from his couch in the late afternoon
he asked about the woman
he sent for her though he knew she was married
he involved his servants and Joab in the intrigue to cover up his sin
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom.
The whole story is pretty shady if you ask me! Watching her bathe, calling for her, sleeping with her, calling for Uriah to get him to come home and sleep with her, and ordering him killed when he didn’t.
Laura, you make me smile…”The whole story is pretty shady if you ask me!”…:) Yup, I agree.
PLEASE INCLUDE IN PRAYERS THIS WEEK…..
Bing asked us to pray for marriage on FB, as the SC of the U.S. is ruling this week on “marriage.” I put marriage in quotes because, to me, marriage is biblical; a gift of God to us, and is clear that it is between a man and a woman.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11:15-19. How did they risk their lives for David?
They went behind enemy lines to get David water. David was parched and HAD to have water..Like an itch that needed to be scratched, a human need and most of us would have gulped down the water yet He poured it out as an offering before God. Perhaps he was repenting of the how he put these men in harms way to meet his need? It seems to me He had a tender heart here and he loved God more. God was better than satisfying his physical need.
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom.
1. David saw Bathsheba and instead of turning away, he looked and went a step further and inquired and then had them get her and bring her to his house, and then he laid with her. Basically he had an itch and HAD to scratch it instead of refraining and offering it to God like he did with the water in question #3. In those moments he was like a camel in heat trying to satisfy his soul with Bathsheba rather than God. Perhaps he had a comfort idol operating?
2. Then when David found out Bathsheba was pregnant His approval idol tempted him to action to cover it up, and then his control idol jumped in when Uriah didn’t go home to lay with his wife. David hatched a plan to have Uriah put on the front line by himself so he would be killed by the enemy.
3. Then he waited until Bathsheba was done lamenting over Uriah’s death and took her in to be his wife and she had their son. It is interesting how he didn’t care how this would hurt Bathsheba or how this would displease God.
5. Apply the above word picture to your own heart. Where are you trying to walk on hot coals because you are so reluctant to let go of an idol? Identify the lie.
My comfort idol again. The lie is, “Surely God doesn’t love you enough to meet you there, so you must scratch your itch.” Like David, sadly I HAVE scratched the itch many times, BUT lately God is helping me as I am growing more confident of His tender Love for me. I am answering more often with “Yes God YOU DO Love me enough to meet me there regardless of how I think I have to have this to comfort me for I am Your Beloved. You love me more than I ever dared hope or dream and You are stronger and more ominous than any nuclear bomb, more beautiful than the most majestic mountains. You have me, and you are my satisfaction. You got this! Yet, I say this trembling for my heart is wickedly deceptive and I know I will stumble and fail miserably again. My hope and my prayer is that I will make this a discipline-to replace the lie with the truth and as I taste Him more I will desire Him more than the things my idol tempts me with.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11: 15-19. How did they risk their lives for David? The RESPONSIVENESS of these men to David’s felt need simply astonishes me no matter how often I read this account! At great peril and risk to their lives they immediately broke through the Philistines’ camp (wouldn’t THAT make a movie clip??) and brought water back to David. I think they would have seen David’s response as greatly honoring to their efforts. In pouring it out as an offering to the Lord, David also made note of their amazing sacrifice – how fortifying it HAD to be to them to see David, this one they had already given so much to, honoring and glorifying God. What confidence and faith and hope it had to inspire yet again to see how intimately the God of the universe was in charge of their endeavors!
It struck me in a new way that Uriah the Hittite may well have been viewing David’s pouring out of the water. We surely can know that David the King, and presumably his God, had won Uriah’s heart. This would become SO obvious in the tragic story to follow…..2 Samuel 11:6-13 is an eternal testimony to the faithful heart of Uriah. No matter how persuasive David tried to be, Uriah simply would NOT sleep with his wife while the ark of God dwelt in a booth….and his comrades, the warriors, were in a camped in a field. How amazing that it may well have been David himself who had nurtured Uriah’s faith in the living God. And that steadfast faithfulness sealed his death warrant. Oh, but WHAT a life! Indeed…..a mighty man of God.
I’ve had a hard time focusing this week. Honestly, the Charleston tragedy has gut-wrenched me,racism so deeply hurts my heart–and every time I look at these passages, I just keep going back to wickedness of the enemy and the sinfulness of man. But Jackie, your post so encouraged me--“What confidence and faith and hope it had to inspire yet again to see how intimately the God of the universe was in charge of their endeavors!” How important it is, in the face of evil, of pain–to remind ourselves He reigns, He is victorious, He is in charge!
Oh Lizzy – I don’t know how you could NOT be rocked back on your heels by the visitation of evil so near geographically to where you dwell. We simply MUST pray and ponder and let our hearts be broken for such wickedness. Such a HARD reminder of the “already, not yet” of the Kingdom of God. But we do look forward in incredible hope….”Behold I am coming soon, bringing my recompense with me, to repay each one for what he has done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last, the beginning and the end.” Rev. 22:12&13. For all of the horror there in S.C. just now….there are also those who look to this hope, just as you do! 🙂 There are those who can go and face the murderer and say “I forgive you”…..while their hearts are absolutely shattered. Amazing love, how can it be?
Lizzy, it is understandable how distracted you have been with the events of the last week. Evil is present for sure. I pray that those not involved (news media and activists), who are side-liners will stop perpetrating the lie that many or even all Caucasians are racists. That is a lie, and just because one person commits a horrific act, it is not acceptable to assume others agree or would ever do the same. I have been disturbed at what has come out of this incident. I spent 40 years of my life in the south and lived in harmony with most people I encountered. It didn’t matter your race, your economic status, or anything else. I take offense, that we, are being branded as racists because of our skin color. It goes two ways, and if we don’t stand up and defend ourselves then the gossip will become truth. My mom used to say that the majority of people are good, and I believe she was right. I will keep you in prayer, along with the families of the victims.
Great parallel with Uriah — and isn’t that ironical?
Dee – the “fire in his bosom” reference is Proverbs 6:27, rather than Proverbs 5:27! Maybe that’s been noted already….haven’t had a chance yet to read comments closely…..
Thanks!
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom. He repeatedly tries to cover his sin. I get the sense that there is an attitude of invincibility. He doesn’t see the red flags in his actions and decisions, he keeps marching on, ‘solving’ the problem, never acknowledging the people he is hurting. verse 25 gets me when David seems to be brushing off the death of a loyal warrior, a friend?, and he is brushing off Joab’s sin, too (or perhaps it was natural for Uriah to be ‘reassigned’ probably not though because of the instructions given to the messenger in verse 21).
5. Apply the above word picture to your own heart. Where are you trying to walk on hot coals because you are so reluctant to let go of an idol? Identify the lie. I do not know how often David went with his soldiers into battle, but I can’t help but wonder if this was an issue of “I know I should but, just this once, I am going to stay home.” Had he taken his duties and gone with the he soldiers, or checked on them, his sin would have been prevented. But we cannot underestimate the importance of this in his own life and in his walk with the Lord. In my life, I tend to have “just this once” moments. And of course, the lie there is, it’s ok, I’m mature, I can handle it. This is self-sufficiency, this is self-salvation. I must always be aware of the serpent prowling. Staying away from the “just this once” moments is not about winning God’s approval with my good behavior, but instead never letting down the shield that is about me, Christ, to always be in the battle, for indeed I always am in the battle whether I admit it or not! I recently admitted out loud that I am not good at a certain job given to me. I keep trying to carry the coals by not trying my best at it. I know I could be good at it, but it’s so … inconvenient. I need to see what David did not, that there are others (as well as me) who are effected by my sin. Comfort is the idol in this situation, the lie is that it cannot be done, but He has put me in this place with this job and so, as much as He enables me, it can be done Or at least I need to work at it as if it could and trust the path He has put me on.
Jill so encouraged by your ability to walk in faith and trust.
1. I see how unaware of our sin we can be. Reminds me to ask for the Lord to open my eyes and heart to become humble.
2. A song by third day refers to scripture that one day we will stand before the lord and be judged for every word we’ve spoken. wow. I try to remember this to help me control my mouth and mind and change my heart I desire to be more and more like jesus.
3. They risked their lives to get him some water.
4. I think it’s fine he noticed the beautiful women but he should have left it at that. He started lusting then sending messages to her then it led to the betrayal of Uriah.
5. I have an idol of fear and control. I avoid things that scare me. really, I’m not totally trusting God to protect me. This keeps me from being used by God to the fullest.
I am beginning to see David’s trouble more clearly. In the earlier story, David appears humbled by his warriors, unwilling that a drink for himself would be equal to their life, so he gives it to the Lord. In the latter story David has no humility. He is not fighting with his men, he does not see his mistake in sleeping with another man’s wife. Probably would have just let it go except that she conceived. Pride must hold itself up or all crumbles, so he does one thing and then another to keep himself ‘uncracked’ …
Humility. Proverbs is all about humility. David lost that humility and therefore, for a time, lost wisdom. And it was his destruction until he humbled himself and repented and turned back to God in his rightful place (Psalm 51).
Jill, so strange to me that David would be able to “live with himself” after all he had done. God still blessed David, after all he had done, which is even stranger to me. He knew he was wrong but still knew God was merciful.
“Then David said to Gad, “I am in great distress. Let us fall into the hand of the Lord, for his mercy is great; but let me not fall into the hand of man.”” (2 Samuel 24:14 ESV)
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
It’s so often a Max Lucado book that helps me “get” something. In one of his books, he describes the sinful woman who crashed the dinner party at the Pharisee’s home and cried on Jesus’ feet and wiped them with her hair. Lucado uses a rich word picture to describe how she had accepted God’s forgiveness and been changed by it. He pictures God’s forgiveness as a large cup of wine offered to her. She doesn’t just take a sip; she drinks deeply, guzzling it, letting the liquid spill onto her chin and run down her chest onto her clothes. That word picture has always stuck with me. On one hand, perhaps I only take a small sip because I’m in denial about the seriousness of my sin and I think I only need a little sip. On the other hand, perhaps I don’t fully believe that God really longs and wants to forgive me, so I don’t take hold of that cup and drink deeply, letting it spill over me. That woman drank the cup of forgiveness with abandon…almost greedily, in the word picture. When I’m not sure I can do the same, it shows me something not right is going on in my heart.
Wow, your comments here are really thought-provoking. Thank you for sharing this picture. Max Lucado has such a gift for bringing stories and pictures to life.
I read this earlier this morning Susan, I find myself dwelling in the word picture of drinking in grace. It reminds my of something Alasdair Groves said, about this verse Romans 1 :16 For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek
He said we read that verse and understand that Paul meant that he wasn’t ashamed to proclaim the gospel which is right, but that he believes Paul also meant he wasn’t ashamed of his need for the gospel. That has really stuck with me.
3. One of the incidents of the mighty men is described in 1 Chronicles 11:15-19. How did they risk their lives for David?
David is at the cave of Adullum, and three of the mighty men come to him. He is thirsty, and says, “Oh that someone would get me a drink of water from the well near the gate of Bethlehem!” The text says that the Philistines were at Bethlehem. These three men broke through the enemy lines, got water from the well near the gate, and brought it back to David. I wonder if he was instantly ashamed of his careless remark? He realizes these three took his request seriously and risked their lives to get him that water. He feels he cannot drink it and instead pours it out before the Lord. Perhaps his focusing on himself and his wants (asking for the water) changed in that moment to being more concerned with the welfare of his men.
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom.
It is spring, the time when kings go off to war. But David sends Joab out with his army while he stays in Jerusalem. Perhaps David thoughts were, I just don’t feel like going this time…it won’t hurt just this once to not go…Joab is capable to lead them.
One evening, David walked on his rooftop and saw a woman bathing, and she was beautiful. Noticing her wasn’t a sin, but I get the idea that he then watched her for a long time.
Instead of putting her out of his mind, he continued to think about her. “But each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and sin, when it is full grown, gives birth to death.” James 1:14-15 This was the time when “desire was conceiving” in David’s mind.
David sends someone to find out who she is. He learns that it is Bathsheba, wife of Uriah and daughter of Eliam, who were both among David’s Thirty Men. That should have stopped him right there…Oh. But he disregards thoughts of betraying these two loyal men and sends for her and sleeps with her.
When she gets pregnant, David attempts to cover his tracks by bringing Uriah back home and tempting him to sleep with his wife. From there, the whole thing spirals out of control and David is trying every trick he knows-getting Uriah drunk, but Uriah remains loyal. David instructs Joab to set Uriah up in battle so he will be killed. It turns out that many good men also lose their lives that day. David, after waiting for Bathsheba to mourn properly, marries her.
I meant to reply to this but my comment ended up down below. Nicely done, Susan.
2. Can you think of a story or picture, either from Scripture or a sermon or a book that penetrated your heart and helped you develop a new compassion or to see a darkness or idol in your heart? If so, share briefly.
An experience that helped me develop a new compassion was the death of my father-in-law. I had been working at the parish for a few of years, and part of my job was to help in the planning and practical matters of visitations/funerals. Over time, I had kind of fallen into a “job” type attitude/mentality. When my father-in-law died, it snapped me back…it was not “just” a job to be done, my job certainly entailed planning and practical matters, but also providing for those in grief. From that moment forward, I approached visitation/funeral planning and days differently. My goal was to provide all that I could to give those grieving any bit of comfort I could; my motivation was compassion for those grieving.
Great example, Nanci — how pain at home awakens us.
“Instead of putting her out of his mind, he continues to think about her.” Seems harmless enough, right? You nailed it, Susan. Perfect verse from James to connect with this passage and show the path toward destruction that occurs when he carries fire in his bosom.
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom. The stage that is set in the first few verses is hard to comprehend. This does not look at ALL like the David that the Scriptures have previously shown us…..a warrior king, a servant leader, a man after God’s own heart…..this man David looks oh so BORED with it all! Complacent….maybe even a little of the spirit of entitlement has crept into his thinking? Previous chapters in 2 Samuel have let us see the “David made a name for himself” – a very DANGEROUS place for any mortal!! This David has let down his guard. He’s decided to coast….to take it easy….to remove himself from the circle of his fellow warriors. I find it interesting that we are shown that when he first glimpses Bathsheba, that it happened “late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch….”. Now I think a good Sunday afternoon nap can be a tremendously restorative and restful part of a Sabbath …..but that is NOT the picture painted here! Rather, it seems that David is all about David’s pleasure long before he begins down the path toward Bathsheba.
5. Apply the above word picture to your own heart. Where are you trying to walk on hot coals because you are so reluctant to let go of an idol? Identify the lie. I was really enriched and helped in my thinking on this by reading a couple of the comments above – both Rebecca and Jill shared words I could strongly identify with! Rebecca mentioned the discipline needed – to more and more consistently replace the lie with the truth! And Jill talked about “just this once” moments….which essentially would be caving to the lie rather than speaking God’s truth to my soul in those “just this once” moments. So good. Thanks to both of you. My idol is clearly comfort as well. As a recovering alcoholic, I’m beginning to think that I’m going to have to treat ice cream in my life just as I do alcohol…..it may need to become a thing of the past, with God’s sustaining perseverance!! 🙂 It sounds so ridiculous – but it is beginning to look like a little fox in my vineyard. In Idol Lies, when Rebecca shared about how her pie eating exhibited her comfort idol and took on a life of it’s own, I was smitten. For I was following exactly the same path with my evening ice cream ritual…. I know that I shared here quite some time ago that the Lord helped me to walk away from that habit – praise His Name! HOWEVER…..recently I’ve noticed a different pattern. Just as real. A little more sneaky. I’ve noticed that when I’m disappointed or tired or whatever…..I’ll “treat” myself to an ice cream cone from the nearby Baskin Robbins. Now, I’ve been justifying this as ever so much better than my previous “eating the whole pint” habit. Not so. That is a lie. For the sin beneath the sin is that “I need, I need, I need!” (anyone seen the movie “What About BIll?”). And I would much RATHER run to ice cream than to His Word, to fellowship with a friend, to prayer, to a walk in the field…..you get the picture. It is bleak indeed. It seems so “little”. It seems so much “better” than my previous path. It seems to be not harming anyone else at all. All lies. I say with my mouth that He is enough. My life bleeds the lie that He isn’t. Help me Jesus.
Jackie every thing you said is so true! It applies to me also, not with ice cream, but with the t.v. It seems so stupid yet I do it day after day and tell myself that I deserve to relax after a long day at work then complain or make the excuse that I don’t have enough time to do the things that I should be doing. I have had our cable shut off for about a month now to force myself into doing other thing, but there’s still so much you can watch over the computer.
Dawn, I have had the cable turned off for about 2 years now. I thought it would be hard, but I have managed. I only watch a few things online now. I do want to be informed however, in the next 6 months, due to the extremely important upcoming election, so I will most likely go back to cable for a time. Isn’t it funny how things can take over our lives and we lose perspective of eternity? I am trying to eat less these days. It can be so hard to not just go grab a snack instead of cooking a nice, healthy meal. When I have those urges, I try to remove myself from the situation and focus on bible study, or listen to a NLD podcast, or Keller sermon while I crochet. It usually works!
I love this jackie…”My life bleeds the lie that He isn’t.”
This is such a good post, Jackie. I think any one of us here could take what you’ve said, “I would much RATHER run to______than to His Word, to fellowship with a friend, to prayer, to a walk in the field…” I have gotten into the habit of saving a little dessert…a cookie, a pastry, to eat in the evening and how it’s something I’ve come to look forward to. Last night it was a very large iced pumpkin cookie. This is so good, “I say with my mouth that He is enough. My life bleeds the lie that He isn’t. Help me Jesus.”
5. Apply the above word picture to your own heart. Where are you trying to walk on hot coals because you are so reluctant to let go of an idol? Identify the lie.
I struggle with issues of self worth & appearance, so approval is at the root of it all. I sometimes allow fear and really self obsession to rule my thoughts. I can spiral downward with frightening rapidity. The lie is that what people think of me and how I appear to them or what I have achieved or haven’t achieved determines my worth.
This study has made me take a hard look at some of the internal dialogue I prop myself up with that is dangerous. I don’t want to process this as just a list of things I need to stop doing or thinking. I need to be transformed by the renewing of my mind, putting off the old and putting on the new. I need to be a person of action in these things. David fell in to temptation in part because he was idle. When I am feeling low I want to cocoon myself away. I need to be careful and vigilant, determined to feed on the Word, the Bread of Life daily.
I can see my self in the sleeping virgins without enough oil in their lamps. The fear of God… the knowledge that I need abundant grace and that the God of the universe longs to cover me in it needs to saturate me.
Chris, what a good reminder that this isn’t just about a list of things we need to stop doing or thinking, but rather it’s a total transformation.
Chris — when I’m feeling low I want to cocoon myself away. Such a good warning about how we desperately need to stay in fellowship.
8. Read Proverbs 5 and find a picture that is meaningful to you and explain why.
“For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.”(Proverbs 5:3-4 ESV)
I can just see the honey dripping from her lips, and her “talking him into it.” She is sly as a fox. He is tempted but knows that she is evil to him. Wormwood is a small shrub with a bitter taste. The reference to the two edged sword is that she feels good in the present, but will bring doom to him in the end. Makes me want to stay away (It can go two ways for sure)!
3. How did they risk their lives for David?David expressed his desire for water from the well of Bethlehem; the Philistine garrison was encamped around Bethlehem. The three mighty men went to Bethlehem, risking their lives, to bring back the Bethlehem well water to David.
4. Read 2 Samuel 11 and find examples of David trying to carry fire in his bosom.
David saw a woman bathing; rather than looking away, he looked long enough to notice her loveliness and fire his desire for her. He inquired of others who the lovely woman was and sent his messengers to get her and bring her to him. After Bathesheba became pregnant with his child, David looked for a way to cover what had occurred between them. Uriah’s commitment to David and his allegiance to his fellow military men foiled David’s numerous attempts for Uriah and Bathesheba’s intimacy so that the pregnancy could be construed from Uriah and Bathesheba’s union. When these attempts failed, David intentionally put Uriah in harm’s way so he would be killed in battle. After Uriah’s death and Bathesheba’s required mourning time, David took Bathesheba to be his own thinking none would be the wiser.
sermon notes:
“the seeds of the worst possible live in every human heart” – this is terrifying and definitly not comforting for someone with ocd/always scared to make a mistake. But this truth is clear when he reminds us even the “good guys ” in the bible sin. he says we must be killing sin or it kills us. Anyone have examples or ideas on what it looks like to kill our sin?
Love the good news of Jesus at the end and loved how he pointed out that God goes for conviction and conversion not condemnation. Reminds me of how he approached the people who were about to stone the woman and told them to throw if they had not ever sinned. So very clever considering they were trying to trap him. I hope to share truth in love like Jesus does time and time again.
It IS a great question Natalie. I’ll take a stab ;0 When I read your question, I thought of Chalmers’ “the expulsive power of a new affection” (thanks to Dee I’ve even heard of that and read it!). But I think we have to identify the sin, and replace it it with something greater–something that brings us back to Him. Like Rebecca replacing her “pie and politics” with reading edifying, spiritual books. One example for me– I have struggled with fear most of my life. A few years ago I went through the Bible, and found all the commands “not to fear” and then specific places where God tells us He will never leave us…I have that saved on my computer (and actually just pulled it up a few days ago, to share with my son). I have to continually “kill” the sin of fear, by replacing the LIE with TRUTH.
But you have me looking at where I am NOT doing that in my life today–the “little” areas, those seeds that need squashing–and praying for wisdom on how to squash!
Natalie, Only the Spirit can kill our sin. Our part in it is to prayerfully ask the Lord to shine a light into our darkness, to reveal to us the sinful things that we are doing, but are hidden. The only “weapon” in the armor of God is the sword of the Spirit (which is the word of God). Weapons are meant to kill. The word of God is the only thing that can kill your sin. Read, study and meditate on scripture, then apply it.
Lizzy’s advice is a wonderful real life application!
Good points Dawn (I knew I shouldn’t have been the first to answer!) I guess I read more as how do we, in repentance, replace the idols, the sinful habits…? But you’re totally right, we cannot do anything to kill the sin ourselves. Think I need to re-look at Extravagant Grace! So thankful for His POWER and grace!
Actually we were answering at the same time. After I read your answer I thought they went well together so I added the last sentence because you showed how to study and apply God’s word.
Natalie, I caught a bit of a radio program that aired yesterday on Chris Fabry Live and I immediately thought of it as you posed your question. The guest was Dr. Rosalie deRosset, a professor at Moody Bible Institute. What I heard was GOLDEN…she even mentions what we’re talking about this week with David and Bathsheba. She talked about the sin of “acedia”, or sloth. People called in and asked about how do you take steps to replace the sinful things with the good. One thing she said was, “As you take the things away, you put in the good things until you love them…until your tastes change.” You can find it on http://www.chrisfabrylive.org and go to Past Programs (air date June 24). I know I plan to go back and listen very carefully.
Susan – thanks for sharing this – can’t wait to listen!! It’s hard for me to explain, but in our summer fellowship Bible study last night at church, our pastor led us through a look at BEING A SERVANT vs. SERVING in Matthew 20:20-28. He made a specific connection to our sloth leading us into undisciplined habits that erode into sinful behavior – and indeed mark our lifestyle! RATHER than…..becoming a true servant by following in the footsteps of Jesus….and how the initial DISCIPLINE in this lifestyle leads to humility being built into our characters, etc. WE explored the cross, submission, the discipline of small, daily sacrifices and so much more. Love the new word too – “acedia”!!
I like the analogy of weeds in the garden… sometimes I grow sin in me, tending it carefully, thinking it is a good thing that I need. The first sin I think I realized this about was related to speaking ill of my husband. Women can get into this game of telling stories about how lame their husbands are. I am beyond grateful to acknowledge that Christ has done a work in my husband, the old is gone, he really is a new creation, but at the time I was convicted about this, I could win those bad husband competitions. God spoke to my heart that talking about him in a demeaning was wrong, that only God and my husband could change those things and I shouldn’t be demeaning him others who had no power to change anything. I had to stop it. When those conversations among women began, I had to be intentional about not participating, it was such a habit, it took time and prayer and faith, to overcome it.
Another for me is self-pity. During the time that we had 6 teens in the house, I often felt quite sorry for myself. I would feed fantasy in my mind of running off and leaving the ingrates to fend for themselves. I was tired and one of my favorite daydreams was of stopping at a motel on the way home from work and sleeping, no one would know where I was, no one could bother me. God lifted my eyes off of me, I began to see the destructive nature of my thoughts. I realized while I was focused on me I was useless to Him. I began to pray that I could be a useful tool for the kingdom.
One more! Cynicism….This is a BIG one. Cynicism runs deep in my family. Really we were steeped in it growing up. I took a class on counseling others where we read a book by Larry Crabb. He asked us to listen for how people tell their stories. When it came to the Cynic…. I was like oh my!…that is my sister! I felt the Lord speak to me saying wait just a minute…who else is it? It was a ‘you are the man’ moment for me. This was really hard, I realized I liked being a slightly superior skeptic. Feeling like I was a step higher on the ladder than most, like I had things a little more figured out than the peons around me.
Isaiah 5:21 Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes, and shrewd in their own sight!
Proverbs 26:12
Do you see a man who is wise in his own eyes?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.
Realizing that my habit of thinking that I was slightly superior was SIN left me a wreck, all my righteousness as filthy rags. I prayed a lot and still do to see it when I am doing it. There has been a lot of repentance in me about this. I kill it and it comes back to life. I need the gospel every day, to remind me I am a wicked sinner and a forgiven child.
Great examples, Chris. Thanks so much for your honest sharing.
Thanks Jody, sharing is always a bit scary!
Chris, I could write exactly the same things! Running away from the family, being convicted about how I talked about my husband, feeling just a pinch (lol) more knowledgeable than those around me. These are all things that I have been and continue to work on.
I was convicted to take it a step further and not even think negative things about my husband. Even though no one around me knew what I was thinking, God did. I try to replace those thoughts with how blessed I am to have him in my life. Things are no where near perfect, but they are a lot better!
You make me smile Dawn..there we go again 🙂
Natalie,
I agree it is a great question! I think Lizzy and Dawn’s answers were spot on, and I agree with both of them. This TOTALLY got me thinking and convicting me in a helpful way! All I know is that daily I can either drown in my sins or let His waves wash over me. I am SUCH a sinner with millions of seeds inside-some sprouting and some I am not aware of yet that have become plants!! I think of Genesis when God said, “sin is crouching at your door, it desires to have you but you must master it.” Daily when I choose to let sin have me the seed grows and it puts a brick up beginning to build a wall marring intimacy between God and me-and it will have me if I don’t pay attention and do the things Elizabeth said to do and trusting in His spirit to help me turn as Dawn said, and CRY out to Him.
What is helping me lately as I DAILY, second by second struggle with sin is who do I want to ‘have me’, sin and my idols, or God? Do I want Him or do I want them? Do I want to hurt God who tenderly loves me and calls me His beloved-who knew no sin yet became sin for me so that He could ravish me with His love? Or do I want to continue in this sin-to let it consume and ruin me by taking me further away in fellowship from the One who died for me and loves me over the moon and back.
I have been struggling lately with this question-Do I REALLY love you God?? I mean, do I? I think I do and want to-OH OH OH I want to fully with nothing holding me back-yet daily I struggle with my sin-my flesh. I told him, if I truly loved you then I wouldn’t be holding this place inside back from you. I wouldn’t be afraid to trust you in this area or that area. When I am hesitant to be generous..when I don’t forgive..when I hold myself back from you and pridefully refuse to listen to wise counsel or someone lovingly telling me of my sin. When I pridefully tell God no i don’t want to hear you-I am telling God I don’t love him in those moments-that these things are more worthy to hold onto than Him. YET, YET YET!! I am SO glad for His Grace and Mercy!! I am so glad I am His beloved and that I need not fear him giving up on me-that this burning desire inside to completely abandon myself to Him comes from Him-He has me, and so I can let go of my idols.
Great question from Natalie above — I want to hear some examples and ideas!
When trying to kill the sin of eating too much I am trying to replace it with listening to a biblical podcast or sermon from (Keller) someone and crocheting to keep my hands busy. I’m not saying it happens all the time, but I am trying. I guess this would be killing the sin?
David and Bathsheba Sermon (and thoughts below)
1. The Power of Sin
The seeds of the most terrible, worst possible deeds, live in every human heart…even Christians, including me. We tend to want to say circumstances “make” someone do certain things, that evil is caused by something that happened to the person (I am so guilty of thinking this way!)—but no. We are all capable.
Abraham’s lies, Moses’ disobedience, and David. As soon as I say “I could never do that”, I’m closer to doing it. The worst thing to think is that I’m incapable of certain sin.
From a small acorn comes a huge oak tree. Looking at my own life I DO see self-pity, resentment, even at times envy and jealousy. Definitely pride and selfishness.
John Owen: “Be killing sin, or sin will be killing you.”
“Look for those seeds, see those things that you’re tolerating, and squash them.” Root them out of my life while they are small.
The Bible is not about how to live life to get God’s blessing and go to heaven. The point is that God uses, and gives grace to people like me–who don’t deserve it. I cannot overcome my sin and self-centeredness, but if I cling to the grace of God to the end of my life, I will truly LIVE.
2. The Shrewdness of Grace
“God goes for conviction and conversion over condemnation.”
Be a Nathan–willing to call friends on their sin—but don’t monologue or beat them up. Have the courage, the love and graciousness to speak the truth in love. I know when I do not speak the truth with equal grace and love, and the response is defensive, defeated, and healing is not likely.
I need Nathans. (Hebrews 3:13) I ask my husband and prayer partners to be this for me. I’ve realized it helps to regularly ask them what sins they are seeing in me, rather than just wait for them. It’s HARD to hear things from my husband, but I know it is truth and it is because he loves me, and ultimately I want to hear it and be refined.
3. The Assurance of Pardon
God assures us pardon no matter how bad our sins. When I repent, I receive forgiveness, because Jesus was condemned for me. He died, so I live. Repentance does not earn salvation and forgiveness Jesus earned it.
Westminster Confession: “As there is no sin so small but it deserves damnation; so there is no sin so great that it can bring damnation upon those who truly repent.”
**
What a timely, powerful, and sobering sermon! I’ve heard it before, but need to re-visit it often, especially with how easily I fall into pridefulness and thinking my sin isn’t “so bad”.
The professor in my Romans class last spring gave a great illustration of the inevitable growing nature of sin that leads to death. He told a (true) story of a man who had a “pet” baby tiger. Everyone told him they were too dangerous to have as pets, but he thought it was so cute and fell in love with it. As it grew, it got harder and harder to get rid of, because he was attached to it. One day they found the man dead in his apartment—the tiger had taken his life. The point was that we so easily try to make our sins seem “small”, no big deal, and tell ourselves we can “handle” them. But as they grow, we grow more attached…and one day, if we never get rid of them, they will take our life.
“It’s HARD to hear things from my husband, but I know it is truth and it is because he loves me, and ultimately I want to hear it and be refined. ” Wow! What trust. I’ve been married 30 years and I’m not brave enough to ask my husband what sins he is seeing in me. I may need to give it a try…
Great notes, Lizzy. Yes, I agree that this is a sobering, awakening sermon. This was the first time I heard it and I listened twice yesterday and took lots of notes. It is one I will put on my mp3 player for future listening.
Oh those “seeds” that have the capacity to grow into enormous evil and are too often tolerated (e.g., self pity, envy, jealousy, pride, self-centered, self-righteous, self-absorption in how one looks)…ouch! I was thinking of Natalie’s question of how to kill sin and this morning spent some time searching online…I need to kill some sin that has been tolerated for far too long and from time to time has been allowed to sprout and grow (in addition to other sins that are there too, just waiting and watching for vulnerability to sprout and grow).
Additionally, when Keller is talking about Nathan telling the truth in such a way to allow David to accept it, not condemning, haranging, or putting the person on the defense, and the need for us to be Nathans. Oh, another direct hit. How true and convicting, that most of our biggest flaws we cannot see.
one way to kill sin is to bring it out into the light, confessing it to the Nathans in your life. There is something about baring yourself to others whose opinion matters to you that helps make returninag to the sin more repugnant.
Great answers to Natalie’s good question from Lizzy and Dawn. Love to hear more because this is CRUCIAL.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR LIZZY! I can’t begin to say what you bring to our fellowship here…a tenderness of spirit/heart, honesty and frankness, sensitivity to others, rock solid theology, and love for the Lord that is so evident. I hope you have a wonderful day dear friend!
5. Apply the above word picture to your own heart. Where are you trying to walk on hot coals because you are so reluctant to let go of an idol? Identify the lie.
I struggle with procrastination-putting things off, and complacency. There are things that God puts on my heart that I should do, convictions of sin that I know I should deal with right away, practical ways to apply the truth that I know to everyday situations, old habits that need to be replaced with good ones, and I put them off. The idol may be comfort/security, or even power/control. Old habits and patterns are comforting and secure in their own way, though not in a good way. Or, I want to have the decision to do things when I want to do them. The lie is that I have all the time I need to address these things, that I have control over situations. When it comes to sharing Jesus with someone I know doesn’t know Him, I have good intentions and plans, but often am too busy to make the time to just do it. I think I’ll never run out of opportunity. That ‘s a lie. The truth is, that person may die first.
I know there are practical things I can do to work on making my marriage better, but I never seem to get around to making the real effort to put them into practice. The lie…you can always start tomorrow…next week…