ALL THE WOMEN IN THE GENEALOGY OF CHRIST
WERE RAGAMUFFINS IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER
TAMAR FASCINATES ME:
A YOUNG WIDOW
A VICTIM OF SOCIAL INJUSTICE
WHO USES SEXUAL ENTRAPMENT
TO GET JUSTICE.
As Tim Keller says, “the story of Judah and Tamar certainly illustrates that the Bible is not a series of moral stories about people that will inspire us to live godly lives.” No, the Bible is not about man but about God. This changes the way we read the Bible.
Up until the 1600’s scientists thought the sun revolved around the earth. That one mistaken belief led to thousands of other mistaken beliefs. When Copernicus discovered that the earth actually revolved around the sun, it righted so many misinterpretations.
In the same way, many misinterpret the Bible, seeing man at the center. They read the Bible as a book of heroic stories, and it leads to a multitude of wrong beliefs. The Bible is not about us, not about a series of heroes, but about God. God does not revolve around us, we revolve around Him. He is a merciful God who sees us as we are — sinful, manipulative, and selfish — and loves us. He wants to refine us and change us, and when we are victims of injustice, even though we are sinful, He fights for us. He is our Hero, our Rescuer, our Wonderful Merciful Savior.
Was Tamar wrong to use sexual entrapment? Absolutely. But it is fascinating when Judah says: “She is more righteous than I.” Perhaps you have heard it said that all sins are the same. While it is true that all sins result in the same guilty pronouncement that leads to death, Scripture confirms that not all sins are the same in God’s eyes. Last week you heard Gary Haugen say that the two worst sins according to Scripture are idolatry and injustice. We need to be most concerned about the sins that break God’s heart and tear us to pieces. It isn’t that we shouldn’t care about all sin, for all sin grieves God and hurts us, but so often we are like the Pharisees, swallowing camels and choking on gnats.
This is a story of how God hates injustice and fights for the widow, the orphan, the abused. This is a story of our merciful God breaking through to a man who was blind. God will bring fire into our lives to refine us, for He cares so much for us.
We’ve already looked at Leah, the girl nobody wanted, and how her heart finally turned from her idol of Jacob’s love to God. When Judah was born she named him Judah because it means “praise,” for she said, “This time I will praise the Lord.”
But Judah, like all of us, had a sin nature. He needed The Potter to put him over the fire.
It isn’t that God didn’t care about Judah’s unhappiness on earth — but He cared more about making him holy. It isn’t that God didn’t understand how Judah had been hurt — how his father had favored his brother Joseph. God knows that the sin of others often exacerbates sin in ourselves. But He still wanted Judah to become the man he designed him to be. Keller thinks Judah began “to go bad” the day that he and his brothers chose to throw their brother in the pit and deceive their father with a “kid.” They took the blood of a goat, smeared it on the coat of many colors, and brought it to Jacob.
Many years later, Judah himself would be deceived with a “kid.” This time Tamar would be the one doing the deceiving. Oh — this is a story!
Sunday/Monday
1. What stands out to you from the above and why?
Monday-Wednesday: Bible Study
2. What did Judah and his brothers do to Joseph? (Genesis 37:18-28)
3. In the Keller sermon he will trace a pattern with a Hebrew phrase “Haker Na,” which can be translated recognize, identify, or know. How is it used in Genesis 37:32?
4. When we sin, our soul becomes twisted. If we repent, it is untwisted. How was Judah’s soul twisted here?
5. Where is God asking you to keep short accounts and stay in the light so that your soul does not become twisted?
6. Read Genesis 38:1-11
A. What happened to Er and why?
B. What happened to Onan and why? (The Catholic church calls this the sin of birth control — do you see any validity to this or not? Explain — I’m looking for honest and thoughtful discussion here — not a put down to Catholic theology.)
C. What did Judah then tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why?
D. Blaming others
Two weeks ago our own Elizabeth shared how when things go wrong, she wants to blame someone. (Their car needed expensive repairs and she wanted to blame her husband — which she said, “makes no sense.” 🙂 Let’s consider this, for I think it is a common default of the soul.
1) Do you have this tendency to want to blame others when things go wrong? If so, why, do you think?
2) Why do you think Judah wanted to blame Tamar for the deaths of his sons?
3) When trouble comes into our lives, how do you think God would have us respond?
7. Read Genesis 38:12-23 and describe what Tamar did. Why do you think?
8. Read Genesis 38:24-26 (Very important)
A. How did Judah respond to the news of Tamar’s pregnancy? What darkness do you see in his soul?
B. How does God break through to Judah’s sin?
C. Comment on his statement in verse 26.
9. God is continually finding ways to break through to us and show us our sin. Name a way He has broken through to you recently.
10. Last week in the free message from Gary Haugen, he challenged us: “What are you doing with your lunch?” (Referring to the story of the feeding of the 5,000 — what came from one little boy’s lunch.) Keep praying and pondering about this and sharing.
Thursday-Friday:
HERE’S THE LINK TO THE SERMON ON TAMAR: LINK
Just listen to the Keller sermon called Tamar. We’ll go into it more next week. It is so rich, I want you to listen more than once. I’ll have questions next week, but post your comments here.
Saturday: What is your take-a-way and why?
306 comments
9. God is continually finding ways to break through to us and show us our sin. Name a way He has broken through to you recently.
I feel like He shows me things daily. One example is a pattern I tend towards with one of my children—seeing the hard part only, easily being critical. He continually softens me with this though, and recently another breakthrough. I am thankful that, at least at my kids’ young age, they are so gracious. I apologized for my nagging, and was met with a strong embrace…followed by a very colorful invitation for more time together. But this is one of my areas to keep a “short account”—it can so quickly snowball and become tense, repeating patterns of my past. There is a verse I love to cling to in this relationship, He says “See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.” I feel like He is saying-‘no, you do not have to repeat the patterns you lived, I am doing something new, beginning here, with you’! It’s funny–if this relationship didn’t have its struggles–I wouldn’t see how He is so powerfully with me in it, breaking old patterns–doing something NEW!
I’ve really been enjoying Scotty Smith’s daily prayers–this is part of today’s prayer, ‘A Prayer for seeing all things through the Lens of Grace’ (http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/scottysmith/2013/01/16/a-prayer-for-seeing-all-things-through-the-lens-of-grace/):
“Help me to see people with gospel eyes. Father, help me to see people’s dignity, brokenness and your image in them—not just the things that irritate or inconvenience me. When I’m tempted to view people primarily in terms of how they might harm or help me, expand my vision beyond my experience to your larger story of redemption and restoration. Help me to see what you see in my spouse, children, friends, even in total strangers.”
Oh yes — grace, grace. We can pray for one another to give more!
Wow, thank you Elizabeth, this dovetailed so well with my thoughts, I love it when things feel so certain, that you know He is speaking.
I hope you are still experiencing decreased pain?
Chris–thank you, yes, I have been doing much better, praise for that! I do ask prayer for my husband–this is notoriously the worst time of year for his bipolar and the depression has been fairly strong for him since after Christmas(he is pretty maxed on his meds). I think it helped me finally pull out of my fog and get perspective. It’ll be OK, I’ve stopped fearing the worst, but prayer is always appreciated in getting through these months until sunshine! 🙂
Praying for your husband, Elizabeth…love you
Elizabeth-so so love this prayer..and I need Him to help me see what He sees in other people..
This is excellent, Elizabeth…thanks much for sharing the link.
6. Read Genesis 38:1-11
A. What happened to Er and why? Died, wicked so The Lord took him.
B. What happened to Onan and why? (The Catholic church calls this the sin of birth control — do you see any validity to this or not? Explain — I’m looking for honest and thoughtful discussion here — not a put down to Catholic theology.) he spilled his semen instead of giving her an heir in the brothers name. I say this is so wicked because he was not looking out for the widow, his family, her honor. He intentionally avoided this honorable responsibility. So The Lord killed him too. I think this sin has all to do with the heart.
C. What did Judah then tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why? Go to her fathers house and wait for his youngest son to grow….any gage on his age here? Curious of the time frame.
D. Blaming others
Two weeks ago our own Elizabeth shared how when things go wrong, she wants to blame someone. (Their car needed expensive repairs and she wanted to blame her husband — which she said, “makes no sense.” 🙂 Let’s consider this, for I think it is a common default of the soul.
1) Do you have this tendency to want to blame others when things go wrong? If so, why, do you think? Yes for sure at times, probably most susceptible is my husband…guess not wanting to feel guilt and stem from pride.
2) Why do you think Judah wanted to blame Tamar for the deaths of his sons? Sometimes I have observed it hard for parents to see their children’s sin.
3) When trouble comes into our lives, how do you think God would have us respond? Go to Him.
7. Read Genesis 38:12-23 and describe what Tamar did. Why do you think? She took matters in her own hands. She dressed as a prostitute and tricked Judah. Probably because he refused what he promised in giving his son to her.
8. Read Genesis 38:24-26 (Very important)
A. How did Judah respond to the news of Tamar’s pregnancy? What darkness do you see in his soul? At first he was angry and wanted her burned yet did not see any problem with his own secret sin of promiscuity. Mentioned he did not want to be laughed at to his friend who tried to deliver the goat.
B. How does God break through to Judah’s sin? He has to identify who she slept with by seeing his signet and cloak, when he realizes it was him he softens.
C. Comment on his statement in verse 26. He sees she is more righteous because she took matters in her own hands because he would not do what is right. Though both are clearly sinners.
9. God is continually finding ways to break through to us and show us our sin. Name a way He has broken through to you recently. Again, I speak of this so often but just my attitudes about thinking I am better than little mans mom yet I could be in that position is things were different. God shows me depths of my heart in this and is changing it.
10. Last week in the free message from Gary Haugen, he challenged us: “What are you doing with your lunch?” (Referring to the story of the feeding of the 5,000 — what came from one little boy’s lunch.) Keep praying and pondering about this and sharing. I have been pondering this. I think one way is opening our home and taking in little man. In my heart I now can see us doing it again. Also just stepping in as I observe those who may need help. I can do many small things that seem huge to a person in need.
Small things? Taking in little man? I don’t think so, Sweetheart. That’s huge!!!!
But I do remember when my pastor (Greg Scharf) said that taking someone in was an easy way to make sure we are always practicing hospitality. It’s true.
Angela, your obedience with your “lunch”–truly inspires me, to see what God has been able to do through you because you were willing. And your answer to 9–your heart is beautiful.
What did Judah and his brothers do to Joseph?
They sold him to the Ishmaelites for twenty shekels of silver.
How is “Haker Na” used in Genesis 37:32?
They asked Jacob to identify the tunic he gave Joseph.
When we sin our soul becomes twisted. If we repent, it untwists. How was Judahs soul twisted here?
He decided to make a profit selling Joseph, meanwhile, he was deceiving his father. He was driven by jealousy.
Where is God asking you to keep short accounts and stay in light so that your soul does not become twisted?
I so struggle with having family living too close and have to really work to not let my heart harden, and become judgmental or critical. At times we feel suffocated. I’m sure for those of you that don’t have family living by, this would appear to be a blessing. I’m not saying I don’t appreciate them, I would just like to have more space. In the past I have confided in a friend, but with wanting to abide in Christ, I have recently been able to keep a lid on it. The good LORD knows I need help with that. To quote Joyce Meyer, “I have been going around that mountain way too long.”
What happened to Er and why?
He was wicked in the sight of the LORD and the LORD killed him.
What happened to Onan & why?
He emitted his semen on the ground so as to not impregnate Tamar. He didn’t want to give an heir to his brother, so the LORD killed him also.
What did Judah tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why?
He asked her to live as a widow in her fathers house till his youngest son, Shelah grew up. He intended to let her stay a widow because he feared losing Shelah as well.
Blaming others.
Do you have a tendency to want to blame others when things go wrong? If so, why do you think?
Blaming is the automatic easy way out. We all want to justify our thoughts and actions, and in our own minds we feel that we are right. God can only show us the truth once we get over the blame game. My mother used to tell us, when you’re pointing your finger at someone else, you are pointing three back at yourself.
Why do you think Judah wanted to blame Tamar for the deaths of his sons?
He was feeling the guilt from his past when he deceived his father, therefore he didn’t want to admit that his sons were wicked also.
When trouble comes into our lives, how do you think God would have us respond?
He would want us to reach out to Him.
Read Genesis 38:12-23 and describe what Tamar did. Why do you think?
Tamar saw that Judah had deceived her by not giving Shelah to her to carry on the family lineage. She felt cheated and deceived. Perhaps she wanted to bring shame upon Judah for not keeping his word.
Read Genesis 38:24-26
How did Judah respond to the news of Tamar’s pregnancy? What darkness do you see in his soul?
“Bring her out and let her be burned.” Absolutely no compassion or mercy. It was fine for him to use a harlot, but she shouldn’t be one. They both were wrong.
But does God break through to Judah’s sin?
Yes, he acknowledged that the signet and card, and staff were his.
Comment on his statement in verse 26.
He took responsibility for his sin by admitting that he did not keep his word.
Your mother was wise!
“My mother used to tell us, when you’re pointing your finger at someone else, you are pointing three back at yourself.”
VJ, I understand about family too close…my mother “smothered” me for years and years, from living too close. I was the only girl and the baby, so that made it worse. Mom is gone now and I miss her, but she never untied the apron strings:(
I will pray for you.
2. What did Judah and his brothers do to Joseph? (Genesis 37:18-28)
Initially the boys planned to kill Joseph, but ended up selling him to traders for 20 pieces of silver.
3. In the Keller sermon he will trace a pattern with a Hebrew phrase “Haker Na,” which can be translated recognize, identify, or know. How is it used in Genesis 37:32?
The boys had Joseph’s coat which was clearly reconizeable as his…they presented the coat to Jacob, stained with goat’s blood, to indicate Joseph’s probable death by a wild animal.
4. When we sin, our soul becomes twisted. If we repent, it is untwisted. How was Judah’s soul twisted here?
Judah was really only worried about himself…no guilty conscience for selling his brother, he foolishly allowed himself to think that he (they…the brothers minus Reuben) wasn’t (weren’t) “hurting” Joseph in selling him and condemning him to a life of slavery; he justified it all with the thought that at least they weren’t killing him. Judah’s comment that “after all, he (Joseph) is our brother” is foolishness…if this is how “a brother” treats another, all of the brothers should be looking over their shoulders for siblings prone to malicious acts done out of jealousy.
5. Where is God asking you to keep short accounts and stay in the light so that your soul does not become twisted?
To be forthright and not get caught in the middle of anything in a manner that could be construed as improper, deceptive, or gossipy.
So wise Nancy “To be forthright and not get caught in the middle of anything in a manner that could be construed as improper, deceptive, or gossipy.”–so easy to get “sucked in” and then regret it!
“Getting caught in the middle” has happened before and in hindsight is much more apparent than when it is occurring…I’m trying to vigilant and not allow myself to get “sucked in”.
Monday-Wednesday: Bible Study
2. What did Judah and his brothers do to Joseph? (Genesis 37:18-28) – They plotted to kill him, stripped him of his ornate robe, thru him in a cistern and then ended up selling him for 20 shekels of silver.
3. In the Keller sermon he will trace a pattern with a Hebrew phrase “Haker Na,” which can be translated recognize, identify, or know. How is it used in Genesis 37:32? – When they took Joseph’s robe back to their father they asked him to “examine” it and see if it was Joseph’s
4. When we sin, our soul becomes twisted. If we repent, it is untwisted. How was Judah’s soul twisted here? – He was first going to go along with this brothers and kill Joseph, but then had a change of heart because he realized they would gain nothing from killing him and because Joseph was their brother, “their own flesh & blood”. I think here he was hearing from God and realized what they were doing was very wrong and did not want to have God’s judgement on him.
5. Where is God asking you to keep short accounts and stay in the light so that your soul does not become twisted? – I think right now it is at work. Since Christmas while I was off on vacation a position was posted that I was not aware of and was somewhat what I was already doing for my boss but they approached a friend of mine to apply and was granted the position. Since then it has been very hard to come to work and do my job as unto The Lord and hold a grudge against anyone. I’m very happy for my friend and just keep telling myself God has something more in line for me. Something that He wants me to do over this position.
Will pray for your heart in this Julie — what you are telling your soul is good.
God is continually finding ways to break through to us and show us our sin. Name a way He has broken through to you recently.
I feel convicted and have for some time that I don’t love my neighbor as myself. I long for this to be so in me, I want to bear fruit in keeping with repentance. I pray for my heart to be made soft, to see others not as threats to my comfort or as something I need to feed my self image with approval.
I long to be more of a ‘here am I send me’ sort of Christ follower.
Last week in the free message from Gary Haugen, he challenged us: “What are you doing with your lunch?” (Referring to the story of the feeding of the 5,000 — what came from one little boy’s lunch.) Keep praying and pondering about this and sharing.
I keep thinking about his desire to life a fearless life, it is sticking with me as it did when Dee asked us what does it mean that if we fear God, we don’t need to fear anything else. What would it look like for me to leave my ‘nets’ the things I know and trust in, and be ready to really risk for Christ, believing that He knows what I need, that He has prepared work for me to do and that I can serve and leave the results up to him.
I want to be ready to give up my lunch and trust that God will provide, I am not sure what this would look like but I am pondering.
Chris–I like the way you worded this “I want to be ready to give up my lunch and trust that God will provide”–for some reason it opened my mind to broader thinking on this question…where am I holding back because I fear I can’t do it…or there won’t be provision…takes me back to Angela’s example–I can’t imagine doing it on my own…but trusting in His provision anything is possible!
Laura dancer how is your Mom doing?
Oh how I miss reading all your comments, but I’m trying to help Maurice and Kendra. It is influenza B, Dr said. It’s not as bad as A, but they could tell by a swab of the inside of her nose. He put her on Tamaflu, 75mg twice a day, so we gave her one capsule right away with her noon seizure pills with some choc. malt (for her throat) and got home and she vomited the malt for 2 hours on and off:( I feel so sorry for her. She crys and I just hold her…breaks my heart. You do have to take that with food, but she had breakfast and then the malt, so we thought she would be fine. By the way, it is very contagious Dr. said….hope I can stay well to take care of them and I pray no one else gets this nasty stuff out your way. Dr. gave me a scrip. for some too, cause he said I would probly get it. She threw up her seizure med’s also then, so I’m watching for seizures. Thank you all for your prayers…love you all.
Joyce,
I’m so sorry Maurice and Kendra are so sick, and I know it is hard on you, too, to be the caregiver. I may suggest what my kids’ doctor called the “BRAT” diet if Kendra continues to be sick to her stomach – bananas, rice, applesauce, toast – things that are easy to digest. Sometimes milk and other dairy products can be harder to digest. My mom always gave us gingerale and saltine crackers when we couldn’t eat much.
Lord, please help Kendra and Maurice to get well – help them to rest, and keep their food and medicine down, please watch over them and comfort them. I pray also that You will help Joyce to care for them and get rest herself, and please protect her from getting the flu.
Oh I agree with Susan’s prayer!
Oh sweet Joyce, how I wish I could help you. I will continue prayers for all of you–that they would recover quickly, that the tamiflu would work, that you would not get sick. So glad he gave you a scrip to–I will pray you don’t get it, but it’s good to have it in case!
Joyce, I am praying for you, Maurice and Kendra! (((hugs)))
Oh Joyce I’m so sorry to see this post. How is everyone doing? And how are you? Will be praying for all of you.
As I layed in bed, I relized I forggot Rebecca and Anne and Nancy and I prayed for all our new ladies too.
6. Read Genesis 38:1-11
A. What happened to Er and why?
God put Er to death because he was “wicked in the Lord’s sight.”
curious about this…..what does it mean Er was wicked? Aren’t we all wicked in the Lord’s sight every time we sin? We aren’t all put to death immediately. Does it mean he was out of control? Was he killing men everyday? Was his wickedness an idol or some injustice to others since those two sins are the worst? Do we know anything else about him from other accounts? Was he not physically put to death, but not seen in Gods eyes anymore as one of His children?
B. What happened to Onan and why? (The Catholic church calls this the sin of birth control — do you see any validity to this or not? Explain — I’m looking for honest and thoughtful discussion here — not a put down to Catholic theology.)
He was told to sleep with his brothers wife (?!) to have children and he did. I must be missing the historical nature of these verses. Did women HAVE to have children? I think it’s creepy that Judah would tell Onan to sleep with her! He must have thought so too because he protected her each time. God didn’t like this and put him to death too! Again, was fhis rhetorical or real death? I don’t get this either. I should have been put to death several times over then. I have never really taken man made birth control pills for a few reasons, and never liked the physical ways to prevent birth either. We DID prevent birth however, because we knew having a gazillion children would not be something we could handle in various ways; financially, physically, etc. We saw it as being responsible.
Regarding the CC, as stated above, I do think it is a form of birth control. I suppose if you don’t agree then you could leave that church? I admire Catholics for their stances on the death penalty and abortion; both are wrong according to Catholic doctrine. However, I know many Catholics who believe abortion is okay. I don’t get this at all. I left the Methodist church after 40+ years because I didn’t agree with their doctrine which was beginning to change with the modern society. They were changing it to fit what society was saying was ok. It didn’t make sense to me, so I left and found a church that actually followed the Bible! We do have free will, right?
I don’t understand why God would want me to be irresponsible by having child after child after child. Where in the bible does it say to NOT prevent births? Also, does this mean you would only make love to your spouse a couple of times as to not become pregnant? I believe God did tell us to enjoy each other in that way, right? Some would argue the earth can’t handle more people either, to sustain itself.
C. What did Judah then tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why?
He told her to live with him. For some reason he thought she could marry the youngest brother but then also seemed to wish death on him as well? As if he was ok that his sons were dying? Don’t get that at all. I don’t know what he planned to do other than make her leave after the young son died? Not given much info here. Did HE want to marry her? That’s totally GROSS if so…..
Oh Laura-dancer — You keep a teacher on her toes. How about you listen to the free sermon and see if any of this seems to make more sense — and then come back. How does that sound?
Hi Laura-dancer–you REALLY ask good questions! I love how you make me look twice (or 3 x…) and dig, dig–SO good. I haven’t listened to the sermon yet either, but it did help when I read that it was God’s law for the brother in law to help the childless widowed sister in law continue the lineage–so that is why it was disobedient of Onan to refuse. This is from Matthew Henry’s commentary:
“The next son, Onan, was, according to the ancient usage, married to the widow, to preserve the name of his deceased brother that died childless. Though God had taken away his life for his wickedness, yet they were solicitous to preserve his memory; and their disappointment therein, through Onan’s sin, was a further punishment of his wickedness. The custom of marrying the brother’s widow was afterwards made one of the laws of Moses, Deut. 25:5.”
Then, after Onan died. Joseph told Tamar she could later have Shelah, but he didn’t mean it–he was afraid he’d lose a 3rd son to her. You’re right-it doesn’t tell us (that I could find) what Er did against God–just “grievous”. I think it’s all pretty ick until the end when Joseph is softened!
Ha Elizabeth! You are funny…”…it was ick…!” thanks for explaining the brother thing..that helps. I don’t know anything about this story, sad to say. I listened to the sermon once, but need to again. I keep getting hung up on the passing the girl from one brother to the next as well as the whole death thing. They really DIED?
Laura Dancer, I just listened to the Tamar sermon this morning and it is so cool how God works this out-most if not all of your questions are addressed-and you have great questions!
you did it again….my answer for 6….a-c dito Elizabeth.
2. What did Judah and his brothers do to Joseph? (Genesis 37:18-28)
I noticed first that when they saw Joseph from a distance, they began to plot to put him to death. Their hatred must’ve been so intense that the very sight of him stirred these feelings up. They stripped him of his varicolored tunic – one symbol of their father’s favoritism. They threw him into a pit and their callousness is shown in that they sat down and ate a meal. Judah decided that they might as well profit from this – he suggested that they sell him to the Ishmaelites instead of killing him. So Joseph is sold into slavery.
3. In the Keller sermon he will trace a pattern with a Hebrew phrase “Haker Na”, which can be translated recognize, identify, or know. How is it used in Genesis 37:32?
Judah and his brothers dip Joseph’s tunic in the blood of a goat, take it to their father Jacob, and ask him if he recognizes the tunic as belonging to Joseph.
4. When we sin, our soul becomes twisted. If we repent, it is untwisted. How was Judah’s soul twisted here?
Judah’s hatred, jealousy, and resentment of Joseph led to murderous thoughts and actions; then it led to lying and deceit and wilfully breaking the heart of his father.
5. Where is God asking you to keep short accounts and stay in the light so that your soul does not become twisted?
I think in my marriage and particularly what goes on in my mind, for the battleground is in my mind – feelings of resentment, anger, and unforgiveness start to percolate, and it always leads to a downward spiral (twisting). A good example even is what Dee posted a couple weeks ago about the Christmas gift for my daughter involving my husband, his parents, and myself. I very much believe that if I let those inner thoughts and feelings take over, it will always come out in harsh words, criticism, or actions such as giving the “cold shoulder”.
Another area that I have felt a very heavy conviction in lately is telling a lie or deception. For example, to avoid an angry response (my rationalizing) I tell a lie. Or it could be to make it appear I’ve done what I’m supposed to have done. I know I have felt all twisted inside, because Jesus said that Satan is the father of lies, and I don’t want to be like him, a liar. I have asked God for forgiveness, yet I’ve still been very burdened by feelings of guilt and shame and it is hard to forgive myself.
oh Susan–your answer to 5 is so honest, and I relate. I will pray you feel His peace wash you of the feelings of guilt and shame.
Feeling myself sliding downward in spirit today as I realized the sermon has a fee. I am struggling with the fact that I can no longer make “unneccessary” purchases. With no income/no job I feel so much more responsible about every dime I spend. I am trying to focus on being in this moment and how grateful I am to have the necessities. If you have a moment to pray for me today I would be grateful -I am praying that once I do have income flowing again I truly remember how I can live without careless spending and devote more to serving those in need. I am trying to soak up this lesson and find joy in less. I know I could work as a server as I have 10+ years experience in that from my younger days but I have a strong conviction about not serving alcohol and it is almost impossible to work somewhere that is not necessary. I have an interview tomorrow for an office position (prn) and although I believe it’s not the right placement for me I am praying God opens and shuts doors so I may see clearly and follow His will for me.
oh Becca, praying for you now and for God to lead you, open doors…did want to tell you though that this week’s sermon is free. Go to http://sermons.redeemer.com/store/index.cfm?fuseaction=product.display&product_ID=18041&ParentCat=6,
the drop down menu that says “choose one”…the MP3 version is free–hope that helps!
sorry if I confused anyone-this IS dee’s same link, I was just trying to make sure you got the right one Becca!
Becca,
It looks like it costs but if you pick the mp3 it will say “0.00” so it is free. 🙂 Hope this works for you!
Will be praying for your job interview tomorrow..I so feel for you sister- I love how you are clinging to Him..
Lord thank you for Becca, for her heart you are molding and making new. Thank you that you love her and that you care so for her and about her needs that you went to the cross so you could carry her and walk with her. We ask that you would continue to give her wisdom as she makes choices and that you would direct her to your source of provision and would make it so clear that this is you moving in the middle of her circumstances to love her-to be her great provider and protector. To you be the glory God, in Jesus name, amen.
Elizabeth and Rebecca, Thank you for the help. I was able to download and listen for free. I think it was good for me to think it cost $ because it made me think deeply. I need to think & feel more! So often i just get in a routine and don’t absorb the things I need to process. God gives me so many gifts constantly to help me wake up and grow in Him! I loved when someone wrote earlier that their word for 2013 was “rest”. I see I need to rest and observe more and “do” less. If I hadn’t been disappointed about the sermon cost I would not have opened up asking for prayer.
Right now I feel so attacked and weary. All of my classes this semester are unappealing especially the biology class that is pushing darwin and evolution in every chapter. I love you ladies, the wisdom and faithfulness you share is inspiring to me.
Becca, I can relate to being weary and the Darwin thing-as my kids are public schooled..It can be heartbreaking indeed..Thanks for reminding me about the comment on “rest” in 2013..so encouraging to be reminded to rest, trust and wait on Him with every decision and the events of the day today-my encouragement from Him for today-thanks!
Becca, so sorry to hear of your troubles. I do know how that feels (being down about something you can’t control). I will pray for work for you. I applaud you standing on your principles also. Could you try an ihop or Denny’s or some breakfast place?
I feel so badly I didn’t know or make it clear that the sermon was free — but it is. As Rebecca said, it looks like you have to pay, but you don’t when you check out — if you choose the mp-3 version.
Also — above, Laura=dancer has many good questions and I’ve a full plate this morning — if any of you have time to help her, that would be great!
Dee – not a big deal at all- I am not technologicaly gifted and obviously not observant! I don’t even know what MP-3 means but it worked!
Becca,
I read your posts above and though you are in a difficult time right now, financially and with job searching, I do love your heart. I see you are thinking deeply about things and I see you having a thankful heart! Praying for your job situation…
6. Read Genesis 38:1-11
A. What happened to Er and why? The Lord put him to death because he was wicked in the Lords sight.
B. What happened to Onan and why? (The Catholic church calls this the sin of birth control — do you see any validity to this or not? Explain — I’m looking for honest and thoughtful discussion here — not a put down to Catholic theology.) – The Lord put him to death also because the act he did was wicked in God’s sight. I’m not sure that I see this as a sin overall, but I can see a form of birth control here. It would be like todays time of a man putting on a condom, (hope I can say that here). I hope I have not offended anyone. If the custom in those days was for a brother to sleep with his sister-in-law if her husband died then he was ignoring an order of the custom and from his farther. With all the talk about contraceptives being a form of killing unborn babies, this why of protecting the life of an unborn baby would not be killing in my eyes. I grew up Catholic and had to go to pre-canna classes and could never understand then how the couple instructing us could tell me not to use birth control in any form as they were not the ones going to have to pay for taking care of my child. There are so many unwanted pregnancies today that it saddens me so many to not think twice of what they are doing until it’s too late.
C. What did Judah then tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why? – He told Tamar to live as a widow in her father’s house until Shelah was old enough to be given to her as her husband. These verses don’t say how much time was in between the brothers births so its hard to know how old he was at the time this was all going on. I think that Judah was not planning to fulfill his promise to Tamar in fear that his only son left would also be put to death. I think he thought Tamar was not blessed by God because everyone that came near to her or touched her was put to death. Judah was afraid of the outcome.
D. Blaming others
Two weeks ago our own Elizabeth shared how when things go wrong, she wants to blame someone. (Their car needed expensive repairs and she wanted to blame her husband — which she said, “makes no sense.” 🙂 Let’s consider this, for I think it is a common default of the soul.
1) Do you have this tendency to want to blame others when things go wrong? If so, why, do you think? – I will really have to pay close attention to my heart and mind now when something goes wrong to see if deep down I am blaming others. I know I do hold back and start looking for a way to explain what I did that caused the problem before approaching the person. I plan out my response in a way to defend what I did. I eventually suck it up and go and say what happened and say I’m sorry for the error. Will be searching myself now to see what I do and work on correcting it.
2) Why do you think Judah wanted to blame Tamar for the deaths of his sons? – I think it’s so hard to admit that your children are not “angels” that you will find whoever you can to blame them for their faults. It’s so much easier to blame others then to correct our own faults. I remember how hard it was when Kyle did not learn his lesson on stealing and when got caught again was put in juvenile detention and how hard it was to see him come out in hand cuffs to come to court. Oh how I just wanted to hide and blame myself for not seeing the signs of his crying out. I really don’t think he blames me for what happened but it was so hard to think what others thought of me as a mother when they found out.
I appreciate what you’ve written about Tamar. I read Francine River’s book on Tamar and I realized that what I had learned about her during my growing up years was mistaken and truly she was a victim of grave injustices. Knowing she is part of Jesus’ genealogy makes me more and more appreciative of God’s grace in my life.
I thought Francine Rivers did her homework well for that series. Thanks for coming on the blog!
So glad you joined us Alice.
Kendra has kept everything down today and no seizures:) Maurice had his worst day today probly. I’m still not sick! It’s all your prayers! Thank you!
I’m praying for your husband, Elizabeth
And for a very good job for you Becca
Jackie, so glad jes is okay and praying for her schooling and car.
Chris, how is sweet little cosmo doing? Praying for you and her.
Chris already asked Laura Dancer, but how is your mom doing? ….Praying for much better care for her.
Susan, please forgive yourself…God has already forgived and forgotten…your heart is sweet play-doe:)
VJ praying about your problem of family too close..of how I identify
Julie…our new grandmother!…I’m sorry a friend took that position at work…praying it’s because something bigger and better will open up for you!
Angela, praying for funds to come in for little guy’s adoption.
Dawn, praying about your job and the problems there.
Cyndi, praying for your jobs and that your kids will really pitch in and help you.
Diane and Krista…your always in my prayers.
Dee, praying for you to be able to answer all of laura dancer’s questions!!!
How did I do? I’m starting to see a glimer of light from all this sickness here…Praise God! It’s because of your prayers.
Miss and love you all!
JOYCE YOU AMAZE ME (yes I meant to use all caps:) I so wish I could come and help you–SO thankful you have not gotten sick, I have really prayed you could be spared. Thankful Kendra hasn’t had seizures and has kept the meds down…poor Maurice–will continue to pray for you all. Update us as you can–I’ve heard this year’s flu is really wide-spread. Praying you’re able to rest and stay healthy! You are so loved Joyce!!
Oh the prayer for me made me smile. I hope it made Laura Dancer smile too!
You’re funny Dee! Really, it’s okay if you don’t. Sorry to be so slow, but I told you I have a alot to learn in a short time 🙂 listening to the sermon again today with all my questions in my head!
I came across this today from Martyn Lloyd-Jones and found it so good, I wanted to share:
“Avoid the mistake of concentrating overmuch on your feelings…Above all, avoid the terrible error of making them central. If you put them there you are of necessity doomed to be unhappy because you are not following the order that God himself has ordained…After all, what we have in the Bible is Truth; it is not an emotional stimulus, it is not something primarily concerned to give us a joyful experience. It is primarily Truth, and Truth is addressed to the mind, God’s supreme gift to man; and it is as we apprehend and submit ourselves to truth that the feelings follow…Put at the center the only One who has a right to be there, the Lord of Glory, Who so loved you that He went to the Cross and bore the punishment and the shame of your sins and died for you. Seek Him, seek His face, and all other things that be added unto you.”
That is so true, Elizabeth! I love the last part, especially; “Seek Him, seek His face, and all others things that be added unto you.”
6. A. What happened to Er and why?
Er was struck down by the Lord because of Er’s wickedness.
B. What happened to Onan and why?
Onan did not want to produce an heir in his brother’s name…he did not allow for Tamar to get pregnant with his method of withdrawing prior to ejaculation.
The Catholic church calls this the sin of birth control — do you see any validity to this or not?
I can see some validity and invalidity, dependent upon the form of birth control. Birth control that does not allow for conception I don’t see validity for sin; birth control that forces a spontaneous abortion of a zygote I would consider valid in being considered sin. Additionally, when one uses birth control without the knowledge of their spouse, I think this is sinful, but a different type of sin…not necessarily the “sin of birth control” but deception and dishonesty…birth control and pregnancy/children are decisions that should be mutually consented to by both spouses.
C. What did Judah then tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why?
Judah told Tamar that when Shelah was grown, Shelah would be her husband in keeping with his obligation as the father-in-law of a widow. Judah had no intention of Shelah marrying Tamar. In Judah having Tamar go to live at her father’s home after the death of her husbands, she was out of sight and out of mind.
D. 1) Do you have this tendency to want to blame others when things go wrong? If so, why, do you think?
I don’t think so…I really hate the “blame game”…it is much easier to admit when you make a mistake and move forward from there. People have much more understanding and grace for someone who admits their mistake rather one that tries to displace the blame from him/herself onto another.
2) Why do you think Judah wanted to blame Tamar for the deaths of his sons?
It was easier to blame Tamar as the common factor than to admit the shortcomings of his sons…blaming Tamar made it easier to deny the reality of the situation.
3) When trouble comes into our lives, how do you think God would have us respond?
God wants me to trust Him…He wants me to be a woman of love, faith, and integrity trusting that He is in control despite appearances that might suggest otherwise. God wants me to trust Him and not doubt His goodness, omnipresence, and omnipotence. He wants me to come to Him first with all my feelings, fears, and woes seeking His guidance, comfort, and direction.
1) Do you have this tendency to want to blame others when things go wrong? If so, why, do you think?
It is easier to blame others than to take it ourselves. It seems like we have to live up to some standard and if we mess up, we have failed to meet the bar as we like. So, blaming someone else takes it off our shoulders and we don’t fail.
2) Why do you think Judah wanted to blame Tamar for the deaths of his sons?
It was easy? He didn’t understand the situation and she was the link?
3) When trouble comes into our lives, how do you think God would have us respond?
We should ask Him first what to do and then wait for an answer.
7. Read Genesis 38:12-23 and describe what Tamar did. Why do you think?
Tamar tricked Judah by disguising herself as a prostitute. I guess she wanted to “pay him back” since he never sent for her to marry the youngest son.
I didn’t answer the first part of the first question. I used to blame others when things went wrong because I found it necessary to find a solution to the “problem.” this was even for small things. I would blame my husband or a child. I needed to find someone to blame so I could be off the hook if it was really my fault. It made me feel relieved. I try very hard to not do that anymore. It usually happens when I feel out of control of a situation. Now I try harder to talk to God. It’s hard to admit you made a mistake.
6D. this is what i feel like is on of by biggest faults. I love blaming anyone/anything but myself! This is one thing that came very clear in the idol study. my perfection and control issues make it so in order to protect myself from feeling “less then perfect” or out of control I blame anything but myself for my faults.
I have often prayed for my kids that if they lie it will feel like rocks in their mouths, that is they do something wrong they will be so tormented that a confession will be a relief, and also that they get caught.
this has been my prayer for myself over the last few years with this issue, that God will make it VERY clear to me when I am using blame to protect myself from having to run to God with my hurts and fears.
It has been a very long week and I feel my old protections coming up strong, I long to sit at the feet of my FATHER and have him fill me up, but everytime i try someone wants/needs me. the quietest most peaceful time of my week was filing at my new job 🙂 with still being a little sick I just cant get out of bed early enough. But God is here in the crazy too! while im writing this and trying to focus (6:30am) paul is trying to get my attention and I really just want to do this! so I will come back if i get a chance…..
Praying for you, cyndi. Keep running to Christ, even when you have a few seconds only.
God is here in the crazy too. 🙂
i edited this but it did not change it????
Interesting program yesterday on Chris Fabry Live:
http://www.moodyradio.org/brd_ProgramArchive.aspx?id=100727
Gospel Conversations: Luke and Human Trafficking // Gospel Conversations: Human Trafficking – Now What?
January 17, 2013
We have a gospel conversation in the Book of Luke. Michael Card helps us grapple with human trafficking. From a biblical perspective, why should a person get involved in an issue like this? Join us for the conversation. Then, we talk about the practical implications of getting involved, the how of the equation with Michael Card, Moody Bible Institute professor Pam MacRae, author and activist Mary Frances Bowley, licensed professional counselor Tracy Busse and singer/songwriter Sara Groves.
Nanci – I happened to hear the show while driving and there were so many great points Michael Card made about finding the ministry God has designed us for. I have to listen to it again and take notes! Thank you for posting.
Michael Card was on three different Moody radio shows yesterday…I listened to the Chris Fabry Live show this morning and will listen to the other podcasts (In the Market and Midday Connection) sometime today or tomorrow. I really enjoyed listening to his explanations of gospel texts from Luke…I’m thinking that he must be releasing his book on Matthew (his books on Luke and Mark were released in January 2011 and 2012)…oh, I hope so…I’ve added his books to my wish list…:)
Yes — loved this program! Thanks!
6. Read Genesis 38:1-11
A. What happened to Er and why?
Er was “evil in the sight of the Lord”, so God took his life.
B. What happened to Onan and why? (The Catholic church calls this the sin of birth control – do you see any validity to this or not? – Explain, I’m looking for honest and thoughtful discussion here – not a put down to Catholic theology.)
After Er died, Onan was to perform his duty as Tamar’s brother-in-law and sleep with her so that through Onan, Er would have offspring. But Onan knew that the children would not be considered his, so he spilled his seed on the ground, in order not to give offspring to his brother. This displeased the Lord, so He took Onan’s life.
I see this more as an act of disobedience to God by failing to give offspring – continue the family line of Judah’s firstborn son, than an issue of birth control.
I’ve pondered why God took the lives of Er and Onan. I see that Judah married a Caananite woman. I know that foreign women were grafted in to the lineage of Christ (Rahab, Tamar, Ruth) but what about men? Perhaps that’s why it worked out in the end that Tamar had a son through Judah, and not by men who were half Caananite?
C. What did Judah then tell Tamar to do, but what did he actually plan to do in his heart? Why?
Judah told Tamar to remain a widow until Shelah was old enough to marry her, but he really was afraid that Shelah would meet the same fate as his brothers, so he never intended to give Shelah to Tamar. He must’ve thought it was somehow Tamar’s fault that his other two sons had died.
That is a very interesting observation you made, Susan, that Judah married a Canaanite woman who most likely was not a believer in the Israelite God, and “Perhaps that’s why it worked out in the end that Tamar had a son through Judah, and not by men who were half Caananite”.
I also find it an indication of Judah’s sinfulness that he sent Tamar back to live with her own father rather than taking care of her himself. The husband’s responsibility is to protect and care for the wife and, by inference, the husband’s family should have cared for the widow, I think.
By the way — does anyone have a comment about the new banners on my homepage?
As my youngest would say: Be Brutal. Did you like the old ones better?
Dee I love them, honestly! I actually was just admiring them yesterday. 🙂
I forgot Rebecca, Anne and Nancy…but I prayed for you along with all our new ladies…your all very important to me.
Dee I do love the new front page, with the crocus coming up through the snow. That happens here in NE around March or so and it always makes me smile to think spring is coming. It’s very pretty…much better than the last one!
Thanks, Joyce…with all you have going on in your home…thank you. Please know that you and yours are in my prayers too.
The lavender is brighter, more eye catching in the ribbon…I love the crocuses and the Isaiah verse…very nice.
LOVE it–very “spring” …hope poking through…love the colors too
Dee, I really love the new banners with the lavender and crocuses. Very cheery!
Loved the new banner. Spring is on it’s way.
Thank you all for your thoughts and encouragement!
7. Read Genesis 38:12-23 and describe what Tamar did. Why do you think?
Tamar had sexual relations with Judah through deceptiveness…she posed as a prostitute. Why??…I think she had such a desire for a child from the family line of her husbands that she became desperate. She was aware that Judah had no intention in providing Shelah as her husband; she must have known of Judah’s penchant for prostitutes for sex…this was a possible scheme to accomplish her desire.
8. Read Genesis 38:24-26 (Very important)
A. How did Judah respond to the news of Tamar’s pregnancy?
Judah sentence Tamar to death for her indiscretion resulting in pregnancy.
What darkness do you see in his soul?
Judah was SO certain of Tamar’s sin and the need for HER punishment, yet he overlooked his own sins.
B. How does God break through to Judah’s sin?
Judah comes face-to-face with his sin through the evidence of his seal, cord, and walking stick…these items were evidence that he was in fact the man responsible for impregnating Tamar. He was as guilty as Tamar and even more so since he was the one that put Tamar in this predicament by withholding Shelah from marriage with her as he had promised.
C. Comment on his statement in verse 26.
Judah came to the full realization that this was the consequence of HIS actions…had he not withheld Shelah from Tamar, Tamar would not have had to go to such crazy lengths.
9. God is continually finding ways to break through to us and show us our sin. Name a way He has broken through to you recently.
God has shown me that I still harbor doubt…despite saying “all is possible with God”, marveling at His creation, my heart warming when thinking of Jesus’ love and compassion, truth and mercy, being so very thankful for His redeeming me, etc., do I go to the Lord FIRST in times of frustration, fear, or discontent, OR do I think about WHO I can go to for feedback, guidance, and direction?…all too often it seems to be the latter…do I doubt the Lord’s willingness to help me, doubt His ability to help me, doubt His love for me?…why else wouldn’t I go to Him FIRST…the creator of heaven and earth, my redeemer…I think I have unmasked some doubt in my heart and it really bums me out.
Don’t worry, Nancy. your not the only one bummed out at this…I sure am.
I plan to listen, finally, to the sermon tomorrow—but am giving this take-away now because tomorrow may get harried—husband wants to re-organize our closets (getting my chaos-relief-fix in a good way 😉
I think the story of Tamar is a very strong argument for the Bible being about GOD and not man. This isn’t a story of a role model for good character to me. But it IS a reminder of the incredible power of our God to take sinful people like us and fulfill His plans. That gives me more hope and peace than a story about seemingly perfect heroes. There is a calmness that comes to my soul when I remember that nothing can thwart God’s plans. He is bigger—than anyone or any sin.
I liked too re-reading this passage a few times—seeing this great climax, and then, finally, Judah is stopped in his tracks, his eyes are opened, he “recognizes” who he really is and it seems to me, he turns away from his sin. God doesn’t let him go-He pursues him and breaks him, humbles him.
Today was the best day I’ve had in a long time. My husband took off at lunch and just the 2 of us spent the day together—a way to rare treat. I had read this morning Prov 3. Verse 27 says “Don’t hold back good from those who are worthy of it. Don’t hold it back when you can help.” At first I was like, wow-how fitting for today because we were taking some things to the homeless shelter downtown. But then I felt God push it further, deeper. I thought of my children, times when I’m ‘too busy’ or ‘too tired’—do I withhold good? I thought of other relationships. It was really a breakthrough for me. I was ready to give loads of clothes and more to the needy, enjoying the ‘high’ of giving—but am I that generous, really, with my love, my ears, my hugs? I am with those it’s ‘easy’, but what about when it’s hard… “don’t hold back good…” It changed the way I acted the rest of the day-I pray it continues to transform my habits and reactions.
I’ve also been lingering on the ‘keeping short accounts’ question. I thought about today how I know, very well, what it feels like to keep LONG accounts—like waiting for the person to just apologize…I spent 15 years with that and all that it creates is a frozen area in my heart. I was thinking how keeping short accounts ties into what Keller says, that “it’s always your move”. It motivated me in some brave actions today, a bit scary, really, but trusting the outcome to Him 😉
This post encourages the socks off me.
Elizabeth, You brought out a great point about God pursuing Judah..He pursued him in order to break him-to humble him..This is the potter and the clay-yet He cares for our pain at the same time-He isn’t aloof. I think of being a mom and how I know I have to set boundaries-to jolt my boys awake but it is because I love them and I don’t want to see them eaten up by sin. I am learning to really hate sin in me and my kids and that is deepening my love for them because I see their issues as sin related rather than them trying to frustrate me. I think God is this way toward us.
love this Elizabeth 🙂 it is so easy to give more to those outside my home then in it. I struggle more with holding back from Paul then my kids but I get it!
Saturday takeaway:
The Sermon: There is so much here-I particularly liked the end, but I will comment on this part. Keller said that when Judah found out Tamar was guilty of prostitution, Judah said literally, “Take, burn”. No one was executed by burning. It was saved for the most heinous crimes. It was a horrible torturous way to die-so why was he so adamant and desiring not only to kill her but to have her tortured as well? Keller said: “He needed to believe bad things about her to hide his own failure as a father-to shield himself from the reality of his own sins. Now look what happens-murderous hatred spews out. He needs to believe something bad about her and now he has it-this is confirmation.”
This might be an extreme example but it is the same heart problem we all have. We need to justify what is in our hearts-laziness, stupidness, whatever it is.
God had to jolt Judah out of his blind slumber using Tamar’s sin. The weird part is that Judah was worse than Tamar in regard to his sin-as he said, ‘she is more righteous than me.’ -yet he behaved as if he were righteous and oh that horrible prostitute Tamar who killed my sons!
My takeaway:
There was so much this week-so rich. To put it short-Judah and Tamar are me..My takeaway is #1. I am thankful I am His and I have the Holy Spirit in me so that He can convict me when I am in denial like Judah-I am thankful for that unsettling feeling inside that I didn’t have before I knew Him for that comes from Him. 2. My part is to listen to Him-to heed the red flags inside and the jolts from the outside he brings, and to replace the lies with His Word and be willing to go through the pain of Him shaping me-but this is daily, weekly and when I ignore Him or don’t listen it grieves Him but it doesn’t change that I am His that He is still passionate for me and loves me-this makes me want to turn.
It is hard to look down on Judah or Tamar, or any messed up person in scripture-well in the world really-especially when I see how messed up I am yet He gave His life for me so He can have me in my mess-yet at the same time look at me and say, “righteous”.
I so see the gospel transforming your life, Rebecca.
Rebecca i really appreciate these words. What joy to know in our hearts that our Father is passionate for us regardless of our failures and mess ups! One thing I think this reading/sermon made me realize/ponder is that man will always dissapoint and judge. I must be patient and God will fulfill my desires if they are alligned in Him. I also love that because of Perez’s placement in the lineage and the meaning of his name we can witness God’s promise to us within this story.
8. Read Genesis 38:24-26 (Very important)
A. How did Judah respond to the news of Tamar’s pregnancy? What darkness do you see in his soul?
He said she should be put to death. He thought she had broken the widow/family pact? I guess that was a no-no? Yet, he really didn’t care about her because he would have sent for her for Selah if he really wanted her to be cared for. I suppose the darkness is looking after himself only.
B. How does God break through to Judah’s sin?
He uses Tamar to “entrap” him?
C. Comment on his statement in verse 26.
I guess he knows he didn’t fulfill his promise and she took care to remind him of what he was obligated to do regardless? I don’t get how being a prostitute makes you better than a liar!!!! They are both sins, right? To me, being a prostitute is WAY worse than lying. I suppose she wasn’t really a prostitute though, she was just deceiving him to get her way. That seems worse to me as well. It’s trickery, which is NOT NICE. This story is “wearing me out!” I don’t get how it has anything to do with anything especially Jesus!!! (except that Zerah her son wears the scarlet ribbon which, I think is a sign that represents Jesus). I don’t ever remember reading anything about him later in thr bible though, but that doesn’t mean anything 🙂
I guess his sin is really a sin of injustice which (now I learn) is worse than other sins? Seems weird to me.
I understand your confusion. Yes, prostitution is wrong. Tamar should not have used sexual entrapment even though Judah was wrong to keep her from having a son from their family.
But what gives me heart, Laura-dancer, is to see how deeply God cares about the widow — and about the woman who is treated like she is nothing. Judah’s sin was not only neglecting her and breaking his word to her — but blaming her for the wickedness of his sons and asking the men to bring her out and burn her to death. God was outraged at this injustice.
It is not that sexual entrapment is wrong. It was.
But doesn’t it give you heart that God cares so much about those who are so terribly abused?
Yes, it does Dee, it breaks God’s heart to see the abused and widowed and divorced and the fatherless and it breaks my heart too.
9. I kinda liked it better when i was blind to my sin, it was a lot easier! He slaps me in the face with my sin on a daily/hourly basis 🙁 I will be doing something kind for someone and this stupid little voice in my head will start in “you’re so good, your so nice, not many people would do what you do or give up what you have or put up with what you put up with” BLLAAAAAKKKK. I HATE that voice. it’s as if every time I am selfish or unkind im sinning and every time i do something “good” Im sinning.
My new mantra….GO AWAY STUPID PRIDE. the only voice I want to hear is “well done good and faithful servant, well done” and until then I want the voices in my head to be those of humility and confidence and joy and peace. the ones only HOLY SPIRIT brings and He is a gentleman and only comes if asked.
It is ALL HIM, I know that!!!! I mean, come on, I live in my flesh often enough to know I could never do half the things I do in my own strength, but boy does satan like to ruin even the moments that I am working in the Spirit by tainting them with his poisonous lies of pride….
Love you girl.
9. God is continually finding ways to break through to us and show us our sin. Name a way He has broken through to you recently.
Well, since I now know that there are sins and then there are SINS, I suppose I should focus on the ones that really count? I get idolatry, however the injustice one is one I don’t know if I can ever understand. I don’t feel (italicized) compelled to search out those to whom injustice is being imposed. I don’t feel (italicized) like moving to India or Mexico or any other place where the people are beaten down. It makes me sad for them, but there is nothing I can realistically do. Not trying to be a “Debbie downer” or anything, and probably shouldn’t admit it “outloud.” oh well, I AM LAURA THE SINNER 🙁 bums me out.
So then, if I can’t move to another country because the desire is not there, what should I do? Is there injustice in America? Interestingly enough, the first thing that comes to mind is my moms plight. Healthcare in our country is awful for the elderly who have nothing. Since someone asked, she is out of the terribly awful place and now in a sort of awful place. For example, the new place insists she is on a diabetic diet however I don’t see how mashed potatoes, a roll, and tangerines with cherries is a diabetic diet? So all the “normal” hospitally things that should help make you well are killing her. There is no real doctor at this facility so we want her to see a wounnd care doctor that she normally sees. Well the facility gets upset and takes offense that we want a real doctor to oversee this awful wound that the longterm facility let get out of hand. It’s that kind of “stuff” that is infuriating. Mom has trouble with talking on the phone and seems less “with it” when i call, so I don’t know how accurate the info is. The other problem is since she has been in bed for 2.5 months, she is weak and really struggling to bounce back to walking. I feel sad and hopeless. There’s nothing I can do but call her and pray.
So, injustice to the elderly is right now on my heart. But what do I do? How can I help? When is there time? I also feel mad that people in our country who aren’t even citizens get anything they want but my poor mom gets nearly killed in the hospital! It’s not right.
The Lord cares so much about the injustice committed toward your mother. His heart is for the elderly, the oppressed, the forgotten. When you pray for her, when you love her, when you visit her, when you ask diplomatically for better care, you are His voice, His hands, His heart. You are doing that Laura-dancer.
And you don’t have to move to India. God will put people in your path, as He has your mother.
And again — it isn’t that we shouldn’t be concerned about sins like going over the speed limit, it’s just that He longs for our hearts to be broken with the things that break His heart.
Laura-dancer–wow, the Lord really uses you here. As I read this I thought how personal He is with each of us. Yes, some feel led to go to other countries…Dee has been led to go into prisons…and then you, a heart for the elderly who are mistreated is HUGE. I know He brought you to this through your own mom’s suffering which has been terrible. But I love that you are allowing Him to use your anger at her injustice to ignite a desire to help others in similar situations. When you said ‘what can I do?’-I thought-you are doing so much.Your heart has been broken for your mom’s pain, for others like her–you are caring about the things Jesus cares about, like Dee has led us to pray. When you ask here for prayer for your mom-and we all do pray–that is big. You have SUCH strength, Laura–I hear it in you all through your posts. You are a powerful teacher with strong convictions. Sorry I spieled–just got excited by your “spark”–I am going to pray He will show what He wants you to do and how to find the time, the way…
Laura, when my sister-in-law (my age)died a year ago now of dementia (the worst kind…like forgetting how to swallow)…she was in the nursing home a year and my brother (his wife) and I fought all the time for better care! I reported the nursing home and they even had to get rid of the director and some nurses, but they needed to go, because they just didn’t care! They are there to put the time in and to do as little as possible. Not all where like that…some really did care and you can tell, but most don’t care.
Finally we put her on Hospice and she started getting better care and attention because of Hospice. Hospice works with the patient right there in the nursing home and oversee’s her care and needs. And even if you don’t think she needs Hospice yet…she probly does, if she is going down hill. I’m sorry to tell you this because Hospice usually means they are dying and that is a very hard one to swallow. It devistated my brother and he ended up bringing her home to their home and she died there. But your mom can have Hospice right there in the nursing home. And when they (Hospice) come in to see how the patient is doing every day, those people taking care of her will straighten right up and do what they are suppose to be doing anyway. So I would suggest talking to someone about it, if you haven’t already. It doesn’t cost any extra, and they will get extra care, from them like doing her nail, a back rub, helping her with her meals, getting extra bath’s a week, making sure they get her up for exercise or therapy, going to the Doctor with her and making sure things get done that the Doctor orders, reading to her or looking at photos of family to refresh her memory, if that is a problem, putting music on for her, having a weekly visit from a pastor…whatever! It is wonderful.
I didn’t mean to go on and on about this, but I guess it is a real real concern of mine too, since we had to go through all your going through, Laura. Praying for your mom!
doing her nail? nails I mean!!
That’s great advice, JOyce. Thanks so much for sharing.
Saturday: What is your take-a-way and why?
Just as Laura dancer has been given a heart for the elderly who are suffering neglect in the health care system, my daughter’s marriage breakup and her separation from her children has given me new eyes for women who suffer from abusive or abandoning husbands. Although the situation might not be as dire as Tamar’s was in her culture, still unless a woman has a job outside the home or family to support them, it is very hard for them to get the help they need get justice and to be rescued from their situation. I remember Joyce talking about how hard a time she had it when her first husband abandoned her. I don’t know how God will use my new knowledge and empathy, but I am sure he has a purpose.
As I ponder about God’s heart for those suffering because of injustice, I discovered a verse that shows God’s “DELIGHTS” in those who practice justice, steadfast love and righteousness. Thought it was a neat verse. I want to “delight” God.
Jeremiah 9:24
English Standard Version (ESV)
24 but let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord.”
Diane–love your faith “I don’t know how God will use my new knowledge and empathy, but I am sure he has a purpose.” And the verse from Jeremiah just spoke to me with something I am facing right now-thank you.To remember that He DELIGHTS in steadfast love, justice and righteousness…I love how in this verse, He says those things define Him, it is Who He is. So good.
Diane, thank you for that verse. Don’t get me started in that too! I hate that women get less pay than a man and get abused by them and left holding the bag, to start from scratch without them and must raise the kids to their best ability and then get put down by society and the church sometimes too! That is why I am so concerned about Krista and her three little boys. INJUSTICE!!
Thanks everyone for your sympathy,Joyce. You speak from the voice of experience. I have so many fears for Krista and the boys. It’s hard to trust God, to keep my eyes fully on Him and not fear all the potential pain in their future. So hard!
Diane — that’s great. Often our hearts are enlarged when our own suffer. I know my nephew being in prison was huge for me.
My take-a-way is although I have not taken the time to post or truly participate this week, I was reading the posts throughout the week and pondering many things.
For me it has been a busy and hectic week, but Elizabeth’s unprocessed words of last week still resonated with me and one day I was wondering how to “properly” praise God and the Doxology came to mind and for the past few days I have been singing (in my head, cause I have such a great voice that I got kicked out of the choir as a child for singing too loud) Praise God from whom all blessings flow, Praise Him all creatures here below, Praise Him above yee heavenly hosts, Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost (and I was singing loud in my head, but I could sense a smile on God’s face).
Even from a distance, the honesty, openness, questions of everyone made me think, ponder, see myself doing the same things: Elizabeth…It’s not usually others I tend to blame–I typically blame myself and Becca.. if I intentionally skip over a tiny detail or adjust the story just a tweek to make him think better of me. If I look at myself honestly then I have to confess that I agree with Laura-dancer…Do I really want to admit this? and the answer is no I don’t want to admit it, but in order to truly break through those barriers that are between me and God that I really do need to admit to them, yes I do these things myself.
I really appreciated Becca placing peoples names in Psalm 91, it made it more personal and it was like God speaking and sharing with me.
Elizabeth…and so few are willing to push the envelope. This was something I needed to hear, as it made me realize that I can get complacent and just continue on in the day to day and think I am okay moving slowly but still moving…but this made me think that even in the here and now that I need to do more pushing.
Tamar took a huge risk doing what she did, she did go about it the wrong way, but it was the only way she felt at that time to get the attention to her plight from Judah that was needed. She had to step outside her comfort zone…big time. It is really hard for me to step outside of my comfort zone as I usually get knocked down when I do…but now I wonder if in those times, it wasn’t God showing me that it’s okay to get knocked down, cause He helps me back up. I suspect I will be stepping outside of my comfort zone again as I kinda feel Him subtly preparing me for it. So far, I really haven’t “enjoyed” it when I take that step as it generally involves something painful, but I have gotten to the point where I wince, tilt my head to the side, bring my shoulder up, look up and say I guess I am ready…am I? and then sigh and step out gingerly. One of these days He will get me to the point where I can eliminate the wincing and sighing part and just step out and say okay here we go.
I pondered this week on many of the questions and thoughts and then it occurred to me that when God was putting together His human family tree the “big names” in that list were women who had been treated poorly, abused, abandon, unloved, rejected, used,…Leah, Tamar, Rahab, Ruth, Bathsheba. I am sure there were other women in Christ’s genealogy that weren’t treated as well as they should have been, but it stood out to me that God took great care to point out how unjustly these women were treated by men but were so acceptable and loved by God that Christ deliberately and lovingly placed them His family tree. From mankind’s point of view they were damaged goods, from God’s point of view they were treasured goods.
That was my long distance take-a-way this week. Oh and Dee thanks for the “God is here in the crazy too. :-)” I was in the crazy at the moment I read that and totally made me laugh…thanks, and I also like the new banner too.
Mary I love how you have taken notes on the comments and used them to help you in your own way and how you praise God now! And I laughed when you said you were kicked out of choir?! I can’t sing very well either, but never kicked out! I love your heart!
Thanks…I sing very quietly in church, but when I am singing in my head, I am that little girl singing loudly and off key to my Lord. Actually that incident as a child recently allowed me some compassion for another little girl who was probably about 4-5 and was dancing in the isle at church during worship. Her mom was trying to quiet her and at then end of the service I turned around and told the little girl that I thought that Jesus loves dancing for Him just as much as He likes singing to Him…and is she was dancing for Jesus, He would love that. Well the mom looked at me a little odd, but that little girl’s face beamed. Mom said thanks and the little girl skipped out of the church very content. If I hadn’t had my singing crushed when I was small, I probably would have been annoyed at the “disruption” around me and crushed another little girl. It was an example to me that God uses our experiences, even from when we were small to mold and shape who He wants us to be.
Great ponderings, Mary.
Thanks for participating with your takeaway, Mary. You have obviously been pondering and I appreciate it. Loved your last sentence, “From mankind’s point of view they were damaged goods, from God’s point of view they were treasured goods.” May we always see ourselves as treasured goods.
Now that I have come down from my podium, I would like prayers for my husband, as Kendra is getting better everyday and I am fine yet…but, Maurice (pronounced Morris)is bad and I’m worried if he gets any worse, he will be in the hospital. He always has had worse colds than we would for some reason (maybe it’s because he is diabetic?), plus he didn’t get the flu shot, like we did. He coughs so much his head and chest hurts and can hardly talk (which isn’t all bad…sorry!) But seriously, I am worried about him. His son and I are keeping tabs on him very closly. His son says that some people get phemonia or broncitis or have even died from this influenza. So it’s no picnic! Thank you so much for your prayers!
Will pray for Maurice! I hope it doesn’t get that bad!
Father, we lift up Maurice to you and ask for your mercy.
In Jesus Name I pray
Good morning, Joyce…glad to hear that Kendra is getting better. Regarding Maurice…my brother has had “the cold” for a bit; yesterday he finally went to urgent care…he was coughing so badly that his ribs hurt and he couldn’t control the coughing. The doctors gave him some antibiotics…apparently he didn’t have bronchitis, but some bacterial infection that his immune system needed help in combating. Has Maurice gone to the doctor yet?…might be a good idea, especially with the complication of diabetes.
Amen to Dee’s prayer.
Joyce,
When my son gets sick, he also gets it worse, but that is because he has Asthma. I wonder if having a condition like being diabetic, asthma,etc means the immune system is already weakened and that they have to pay extra attention. I have recently been told (the flu is going around our office) that extra Vitamin D will help boost the immune system greatly. Apparently its up to 4-5000 IU of Vitamin D3 while one is sick. Both my parents were very ill in the last couple of weeks (we almost took both to the hospital) and my dad (also diabetic) said the extra D3 really helped him get over it faster. Although they are still tired, they are both better now.
I will be praying that Maurice gets better and not have to go to the hospital, and I also Amen to Dee’s prayer.
Let us know how he is doing.
Praying for Maurice, Joyce. This is such a serious flu for many!